Do I Reach You?
by iluvorangetulips
Summary: HIATUS Hinata doesn't talk, Naruto can tell a lie from the truth, Sasuke is just there to help Hinata. How can Hinata communicate how she feels without words? Will her feelings reach someone?
1. Listen

_So, I shouldn't be doing a new story but I can't help myself! _

_I came up with this idea today and really wanted to write it but instead of writing it down I decided to type it out in Word and now you have the first chapter._

_Don't expect quick updates after all I'm currently writing for _Gossip is never true_ and I have to type up _Rebels_ and _The way WE live_ and _a King an Oracle and 12 Knights_, so many and then there's still the new _Captain Hinata and Friends_ and _I'll always find you_…why do I write so many stories…_

_Not sure if you guys are interested but this idea came to me because I was wondering how easy it is communicating to someone how you feel by the expressions on your face and without having to say a word especially to those close to you. And so I thought what if Hinata for some reason or another stopped talking what would become of her? How would she make friends? You know stuff like that and next thing I knew I came up with the first sentence of the story…_

* * *

**Chapter 1: Listen**

I don't talk.

I think you should know this before anything else, I don't talk at all, I used to about ten years ago but now I don't…

No, I have no physiological trauma or anything…I just don't want to be heard…

"Hinata," I look up at the sensei he's new so he doesn't know yet, "can you give me the answer to number two of the homework from last night?" he asks me politely and I just stare up at him keeping my eyes blank and my mouth tightly shut.

"Sensei," I hear Sakura speak up, I don't look at her and keep my eyes on the new sensei, "Hinata is a mute, she won't talk for anything," she says snickering. I look down at my book, she should know. One day she tested that theory on me as she and her friends cornered me in the bathroom and beat me, I didn't tell on them or scream out as they hit me and pulled my hair, I just let them and didn't fight back.

"Its fine she'll talk, I'll get her to talk to me," he says it with such confidence. That's how it is with all the sensei's they think they'll get me to be different with them, but they soon learn the harsh reality and give up on me in just a few weeks, it's always the same. I don't care though I don't.

He continues on with his lecture and I look down at my open book, I feel someone's eyes on me but I don't look up at the person, I don't care who it is that's staring at me.

I'm not…I guess I' am a little scared to talk, because I wonder: would I be heard? Would anyone hear me or even care what I have to say?

I mean I've…I haven't talked in so long so would I still be heard? Would I?

Can you tell me if you hear me would you listen with your heart open to me?

I look up at the clock the bell is going to ring; I look around and find everyone starting to get their stuff together even though the sensei hasn't said anything. I do the same and begin to put my stuff away, the sensei grabs a hold of my arm as I walk past him after the bell to dismiss us rings. I look over at him and he smiles.

"Can you stay for a minute? I'll give your next teacher a pass explaining that I held you back," he tells me in a pleasant voice, he isn't thinking about anything pleasant…

"Don't you know that sensei's shouldn't touch a student, it's considered sexual harassment," I look over at the back of the class and find a fellow loner Sasuke there looking angrily at the sensei, right away he removes his hand.

"What are you saying Sasuke, I just wanted to have a word with Hinata," I step away from him and walk closer to the door, "so if you should leave because it's private." He orders, my eyes look over at Sasuke I know I'm looking at him with pleading eyes.

"Look, just because Hinata doesn't talk doesn't mean I won't," he says standing and slowly gathering his things. "You may not know this but Hinata she can communicate fine without words, hell she can write," he says as he closes his shoulder bag. He walks towards me and rests his hand on my head. "She has people to defend her and speak for her." Sasuke says as he pushes me out of the door.

I look up at Sasuke and wipe the tears that were about to fall out of my eyes, he shakes his head in disbelief.

"Seriously Hinata," he murmurs, I look over at him and find his red face. He isn't having pleasant thoughts either. "You should start to talk if you don't I'll forget how your voice sounds…" he tells me before leaving me behind. I stop to watch his back, he still remembers it?

Because suddenly I've forgotten it…

I've tried you know, I've tried talking but it's almost as if my throat doesn't work anymore. It doesn't make a sound, I can mouth the words but no sound comes out…

What should I do?

He disappears around the corner, he's ditching again so I get to eat alone at lunch. Sasuke isn't a friend as much as a loner, we don't hang out outside of school, and the two of us eat lunch together and have a few classes with one another. I walk again dragging my feet to my next class which is biology, I still don't get why I chose biology over life sciences, which is way easier.

I walk down the empty hall, its funny how quickly the halls become empty, I hear someone run behind me and next thing I know my shoulder bag is taken off of my shoulder and falls to the ground, in the process all my books fly out. I look over at the running figures and they laugh like crazy, before if this happened I'd hide in the bathroom to cry; now I don't care…

I just look at my stuff I keep my eyes down, it looks so weird, you know? My belongings that were in my bag are now on the ground, I notice a pencil broken and my pens and post-its scattered on the ground ,my notebooks are open and my binder is half open with some of my loose papers flying away as the wind lightly blows by.

I'm tired…just so tired…

"Those guys are assholes," I look over to find a handsome blonde haired boy. He doesn't have our uniform on; instead he's just in jeans and a t-shirt. "Should I run after those bastards?" he asks me, I look up at him. I study his angry expression, why is he mad? I tilt my head, I've never seen him before, he looks ahead then he turns his head to me and smiles. I feel my heart beat faster as that striking smile is directed at me, no one has ever smiled at me like that, he chuckles and scratches the back of his head. "I guess that's a no?" he questions me; I shrug my shoulders and go down to pick up my books and the rest of my belongings. "I'm new; my name is Uzumaki Naruto, what's yours?"

I look up at him and he bends down to help me pick up my stuff, I look at my notebook and point at my name with my finger, I hear the bell ring and I sigh.

"Hyuga Hinata," he whispers, I nod and zip up my bag, "Oi, can you tell me where class room fifty-four is at?" he asks me as he too stands. I look over my shoulder at him and his smile is small and weary, I'm freaking him out because I'm not talking at all, he lets out a small insecure laugh. "I arrived way-y late and don't know my way around this school," he tells me softly, I nod and lead him forward. "You know I haven't heard you say a word," he comments and I nod, I look back at him and mouth the words.

Don't talk…

He looks at me his expression turns funny. "What?" he shouts, I glare at him and mouth the words again.

Don't talk.

"I can't hear you!" I give him my back and walk faster, he's laughing at me! The jerk is making fun of me! "Hey, wait up!" I walk to my classroom and pull the door open and bow at Hatake-sensei, he nods.

"Glad you made it Hyuga-san," he tells me, then he looks at the new student, "Ah, you brought Naruto with you!" he says in a happy voice, I ignore him and walk to the back where Sasuke and I share our desk. "Class this is a new transfer student who's named Uzumaki Naruto," I can feel those cerulean eyes on me as I look down at my empty desk. "Since you seem to know Hyuga-san how about you go sit next to her?" I look up and shake my head and throw my bag over the empty desk, Naruto smirks and walks over to me. He has an evil grin on his mouth as he pulls out the chair and throws himself in it. He pushes my backpack to me and I glare over at him.

"What is wrong with you?" he asks me in a whisper as Hatake-sensei begins class. I ignore him and open my bag and take out my biology notebook and a pen, I start to take notes. "I'm talking to you!" he says in a louder tone. I continue to ignore him and I can feel him grow angrier. "Don't you know it's customary to answer when someone is talking to you?" he shouts pulling my notebook away.

I open my mouth to shout back but nothing comes out. I look around to find everyone in the class watch us and don't pay attention to our sensei. I feel the tears prickle in my eyes, I look down at the desk, they saw…

The whole class saw me try to talk…

I feel so stupid!

"She doesn't talk," I hear Kiba speak up, he sits in front of me, I can feel his curious eyes on my down bent face. "Hinata doesn't talk anymore," he whispers. I'm pissed off, I lunge for my notebook and take it from Naruto and grab my bag, and I stand and walk out of the class room. I don't need this!

I run as soon as I get out the door, I…my face is burning red with embarrassment, I'm such an idiot. Why did the boy get me so angry that I tried to talk as the whole class watched? Shit I've never felt this way before.

"Hinata, are we ditching class?" I look back at our school principal. "You know you shouldn't get caught especially not by the principal," he tells me with a small grin on his mouth. "Sasuke is in the office right now too because he got caught. Now come with me so that I can write you up a week's worth of detention including Saturday." Mr. Sarutobi is a kind man but most of all one that follows the rules.

He walks ahead of me knowing I wouldn't run away from him I follow after him slowly and keep my head down.

I do that a lot too, my head is always down, and sometimes I forget what color the sky is because all I see is gray…

* * *

"Eh? Who was that?" Kakashi-sensei asks as he looks at the class room door that just slammed, she's quick.

"Hinata just walked out of your class room sensei," some girl says with a laugh. He looks back to the empty seat next to me.

"What did you do Naruto?" why does he have to accuse me?

"Nothing, I barely know the girl to piss her off," I say leaning back in my chair.

I hear him sigh, "Here I thought you made a friend…" he murmurs thinking I don't hear him. That girl…she just pissed me off for no reason, I was harsh though, I shouldn't have shouted at her like that. Especially because I could tell that she was the shy kind of girl, yeah. I'm an asshole just like those jerks who threw her bag, except I didn't help her this time. I was the cause of it…

But whatever, I don't care about her; I'm here to make new friends, to live a different life.

But I think back to the tears that formed in her eyes, and how she moved her mouth and no sound came out. This guilt I feel at the expression on her beautiful face is eating at me…

I have to apologize; I couldn't live with myself if I don't.

"So where do you come from?" I hear someone whisper to me I look up and a pink haired girl smiles at me. "I'm Sakura by the way," she says, I nod.

"Naruto," I respond, "I'm from the…" where am I from? "The land of fire," I say after I paused, she stares at me a bit longer.

"You're kind of cute," she says with a blush. I can tell she's acting, that blush is fake, and so is her "innocent" act. I don't know how or why but for some reason I can tell when people lie about anything. I knew that mute girl wasn't lying but I still pushed her into a corner.

"Thanks, I get that a lot, especially from my girlfriend," but I can lie better than anyone. Maybe that's why I can tell when people lie because I always lie…

"Oh?" she whispers then she faces forward and I hear the blonde girl next to her giggle.

This is going to be very hard for me. I can feel it already…


	2. Woof

**

* * *

**

Hinata6

: Thank you!! I'm glad you like it!!! Ah, that's a first! No one's ever said that! Thanks!

Yup, he does although sometimes he forgets his purpose and leaves. True you will.

I will! Thank you very much!

**rosa1817**: Thanks I'm happy you think it's interesting!! I try but it's hard to do so! Ah, sadly I won't spoil it for you, if you want to know you'll have to keep reading the story. And thank you very much for the review!

**So Happily Unsatisfied**: Ah! I'm excited the very first person to review, thank you!!!! She totally did!! Thank you I love the word interesting I hope I don't disappoint you!!! I really hope you do stay with me until the end!

* * *

_**So as you guys can notice I re-did the second chapter. The original chapter didn't work for me because I thought the progress in the story was happening too quickly and I wouldn't be able to write a lot for this story so I decided to change the chapter, so I hope you like the new chapter. Hopefully the 3**__**rd**__** chapter is added soon, I'm working on it and I like it. But then again I did write so I have to like it…**_

_**I left the start kind of similar…**_

_**By the way turquoise pens are wonderful. **_

_**I plan to update my other stories soon…**_

_**Since college starts in August…**_

* * *

**Chapter 2: Woof**

Have you ever felt the need to stop talking altogether?

Like you just want to shut up and not say anything, not in fear or anything like that but it's just that you feel you're better off not talking at all?

"Hinata!" I look over at Sasuke who stands next to me, I shake my head, and what was I thinking? "Now where did you go?" he asks me in a bored tone, I shrug my shoulders. We stand at the counter of the main office as we wait for the principal Sarutobi to hand us our detentions.

I look over at the four secretaries they all have their own desks and they all sit in front of their computers, the phone rings at one of their desks and that secretary answers the phone. Why does he need so many?

But then I look over at the doorways I see that the vice-principal's offices are in these offices too, oh, I get it.

Sasuke, I look over at him and find him looking down at a red paper that's taped to the counter, I look at it and find nothing interesting.

"Why did you want to ditch today?" I hear Sasuke whisper, I look over at him and find him looking down at me, and I shrug one shoulder and look down. "Did something happen in biology?" he whispers, I shake my head quickly.

"Here," I look up and see Mr. Sarutobi, "sign here and initial here," he says pointing down at some lines. "This is the first time Hinata has to go to detention, right?" I look up and nod. "Sasuke might actually attend the detention now that you're going to be there," Sarutobi tells me with a chuckle. I tilt my head wondering what he's trying to say.

"Don't listen to this old senile man," I look over at Sasuke and find his face red again.

"Ha ha!" Mr. Sarutobi laughs happily and tears the top of the detention slips and gives us the top page. "I'll be going to the detentions to make sure that the two of you attend," he tells us as he leaves laughing.

"Shit! And I was almost across the street too!" Sasuke informs me. The policy of the school is that once you are across the street from the school then no one can force you back to school grounds. I look up at him and find his expression showing his irritation I look back down at my slip. I won't be getting home early now will I?

I guess that makes me happy, I then feel Sasuke put his hand on top of my head and brings my face down on his shoulder.

"You should show that you are glad," he tells me, I try to look up at him but he doesn't let me, "Hinata you tire me out sometimes you know."

Where is this coming from? I want to see his expression because then I'll get a clue as to what he's feeling.

"Is your dad still acting as if you don't exist?" he asks me as we walk out of the office, I stop and he tightens his hold on my head, without thinking I nod.

I don't tell him that I was kicked out of the house and now I'm living alone. He'll worry more, and Sasuke has enough problems to deal with.

Plus there's no real way how to tell him…

"He's an asshole for treating you like this," he says I nod and shrug my shoulders. I already almost cried today, I don't want to cry, not now…so I pull away from Sasuke and walk ahead. I can't always rely on Sasuke, I have to move forward if I want to be strong.

* * *

"What is that around your neck?" the short brown haired boy who talked to me in bio asks me as we walk out the door.

"Oh, I'm an amateur photographer," I say holding my 'baby.'

"You like to take pictures?" he asks, I nod. I ignore the stares that are directed at me from everyone who slowly walks behind us trying to listen to our conversation.

"That chick really doesn't talk?" I ask him still curious about the girl.

"Yup! It's been about ten years or so that I haven't heard her."

"I think she's doing it for sympathy," I look back to find a guy come between us. "I'm Shikamaru."

"You're just mad that you asked her out and she shook her head so fast that she got whiplash!" the guy who was talking to me earlier says laughing.

"I still believe that there's a story behind it. I'm Chouji by the way," he says coming to my other side.

"What do you mean?" I ask confused.

"No normal girl would just stop talking for no reason. There has to be a hidden trauma behind it," he insists.

"Nah, she's just like that to continue to cling onto Sasuke-sama. If she talked he'd leave her in a second!" some blonde girl says from behind. "Ino, that's my name."

"Sasuke, pfft! He's just clinging onto her," Shikamaru mutters.

"Shut up you liar!" Ino (_I think_) shouts.

"I'm just telling you guys now I'm bad at names and faces, so tomorrow I might forget all your names," I confess to them.

"So why did you move to Konoha?" the big dude asks me.

"Oh, no reason," I answer with a slight smile.

"Your parent's right? That's why I hate mine, they just make decisions for you without discussion it," the pineapple haired guy comments. My fake smile disappears and I look over at him.

"You're lucky to have parents to nag you," I say in a low voice. "Because both of my parents are dead, so you are a lucky guy."

"Oh, man sorry, I didn't know." The guy quickly apologizes.

"It's all right," I force out my laugh, "do any of you have library aide for fifth?" I ask.

"Right, now is lunch, why don't you sit with us?" the one guy that talked to me in bio asks me. I don't know anyone else and I don't want to eat alone.

"Sure thanks!" I say with a smile and laugh.

I soon find out that this group of kids is the popular crowd. It feels like the jokes on me for some reason…

Well this is certainly a surprise…I eat my rice balls as I look around the lunch area. I've found out that the first years are stuck in the cramped cafeteria while the upper classmen eat outside under the shade of trees.

I look back up at the group of students who offered me a spot in their little group. I watch as the blonde girl tries to flirt with the lazy guy, the fat dude watches as he devours his huge lunch. I feel the pink haired girl's eyes on my back, the boy with the short brown hair glances to the side at me.

"So does that mean you live by yourself?" he questions me.

"Yeah," I answer. I look away again trying to locate the girl.

"She doesn't eat here," he says. I look back at him and find him looking down at his lunch. "Hinata and Sasuke eat over on the football field that's in the middle of the track. Vice principal Orochimaru has given them permission to eat over there. Rumor has it that Orochimaru is in love with Sasuke which is why Sasuke can do whatever he wants," he whispers to me as he glances around making sure no one listens.

"Sasuke..." I say his name, it seems so familiar.

"Shut up!" I hear the pink haired chick shout as she slaps the guy behind his head. "Kiba's lying," she proclaims. I figured as much…after all I can tell a lie from the truth. "It's because the Uchiha's have donated lots of money to the school that's why Sasuke-sama is allowed to do many things that we aren't. Vice principal Orochimaru doesn't feel that way for him."

"She's only saying that because Sakura is the President of the: _I love Sasuke Uchiha fan club_, they even hold meetings and exchange pictures of him that they take in secret, write poems and shit like that!" the loud liar (_he isn't lying about this, how lame are they_?) shouts laughing. He gets slapped behind the head again.

"So what?" the pink haired girl cries out. I look over at her red embarrassed face. Wow, this chick is a psycho…

"Yeah, leave the big forehead President alone!" the blond girl says snickering.

"What was that pig?" the psycho shouts walking over to her, I ignore them as I keep eating. I vaguely hear as they argue.

How are they friends? No, the question is: why are they friends?

"By watching them act like this you wouldn't think they aren't close right?" the sleepy eyed dude asks me.

"Are they?" I question before I can think.

"Oh yeah." He re-affirms me. "They are just really similar which is why they always clash," he tells me as he takes a sip of his soda. "It may not look it but we've been together since elementary school."

"So all of you are close?" I ask just to keep talking. I'm not even really paying attention.

"Yes and no," he admits sitting up on the table which he was laying on top of. "All of us and some others who went on a field trip are. But there are two that believe they are better than us, thus they prefer to eat alone away from everyone else."

"That's not the reason Shikamaru," the fat dude speaks up.

"See, my best friend Chouji is a nice guy, which means that he can't see anything bad in anyone," the now angry guy says.

"It's nice though," I say for some reason.

"It's not," the angry guy retorts, I look at him, the expression on his face tells me that I have no reason to argue, it's his way or else. "Chouji is naive."

I look up at him wondering why he's getting offended.

"Okay…" I whisper as I nod. "I agree with you," even though I don't, at all.

It's a good thing to see only good in people I mean sure the person will get hurt a lot but still. It's better to give fellow humans the benefit of the doubt…

I mean I wish I saw only the good in people but I can't because of all the times I've been hurt have left me scarred and resentful; which is why I always have my guard up against everyone.

"I think that Hinata and Sasuke eat alone because if they ate here everyone would be watching them every day. They wouldn't be able to eat with the school population watching their every move." The fat one says as he points his chop sticks at me.

"I call bullshit," Shikamaru says lying back down.

"He's a doubter and a jerk," Chouji says with a smirk.

"What can I say only that I hate everyone and everything. I hate the world and the world feels the exact same way," he says with a shrug of the shoulder.

Wow…he's not lying…

"Shikamaru is such a kidder!" Chouji says with a forced laugh and fake smile.

"Sure…" I say in a sarcastic tone and a roll of my eyes.

"Personally I think he'd change his tune if Hinata would date him," Chouji admits in a loud whisper.

"Really? Then make it happen," I say as I bring my last rice ball to my lips.

"I can't, Hinata ignores everyone that isn't Sasuke. If you talk to her all she'll do is look at you with those nightmarish blank eyes! I get freaked out man!" he admits with a shudder.

How weird she looked at me with angry eyes and not blank ones. Plus she tried to talk but nothing came out…

Hmm…I hope no one else noticed but then I feel a pair of eyes on me. I turn my head to the side and find the guy with short brown hair watch me, his eyes squinting at me.

Oh, shit he just remembered…I cough and look away as I pass the back of my hand over my mouth.

If she's going to be trouble I don't want to see the girl again…I just want a peaceful school life one without trouble or problems.

I'm a bastard who thinks of himself before anyone else. I don't want to be friends with anyone; I do not want to care about anyone else but myself. And above all else I do not want to help some mute girl nor do I want to fall in love with such a girl.

It's final I'll only think about myself just like always.

Only me and maybe my camera…

* * *

"Hinata," Sasuke calls out to me, and I look over at him, "why do you look like you are about to cry?" Sasuke asks me in a funny voice. "Don't," he orders me in a bossy tone.

I glare at him and he sticks his hands up in surrender, I slit my eyes as I keep glaring at him.

He is such a guy! I look away from him and throw myself back to stare up at the cloudless sky. Today has been a weird day; well I guess it's fairly normal in my own way.

I look over at Sasuke, he is the only person I can call my friend, he is always here for me…even when I don't want him.

"So what are you finally falling in love with me?" he asks me as he doesn't turn to look at me. He keeps his gaze forward and I see a small smirk on his lips.

I look away from him and look back up. If I was a normal girl that could easily fall in love I would with him. But I'm not normal; I'm a weird one that can't fall in love.

There's something about me that doesn't allow for me to love.

I'm incapable of it.

This is the first time Sasuke mentioned love to me; I look to the side again.

What I don't get is why he stayed being my friend when everyone else left me. Why? What makes him stay with me through my silence? All of a sudden his intense and inquisitive onyx eyes look into my lavender ones. He doesn't say anything as he keeps looking. I hope he can read my gaze because I can't ask him anything.

"I'm drawn to you, Hinata is a broken girl and I'm the only one who knows of all the pieces that are missing. You make me want to be the good guy that protects you from all the evils of the world. Especially from me," I keep staring at him.

I hide my reaction from him; he shouldn't see how his words have shaken me. What does he mean? Which pieces is he talking about? He doesn't look away and he is searching in my eyes to see if he can get anything more from me.

"Everyone in this world has secrets that they have sworn to protect above all else. Let me tell you that this secret I'm keeping from you is for your own good. Just trust me Hinata." He tells me in such a tone that it's not hard to place my trust in him.

After all Sasuke is the only person who has never betrayed me and he's been with me and continues to stay with me through my silence. He's never given me his back. And to me that's all that matters.

I smile at him and nod. His expression changes and he looks away but I saw the sadness and guilt reflect on his striking face. Why would he…I shake my head. It doesn't matter. I believe in Sasuke.

I have to…

"By the way awesome lunch Hinata, I'll give you more money on Friday," he tells me.

I make our lunch and Sasuke gives me money to pay for the ingredients of our lunch every week. There are times he gives me more then he has to but won't take the money back. So I buy better ingredients for our lunch.

"Did something interesting happen while I tried to ditch?" I look back up keeping my eyes empty. I don't want him to know that I tried to talk. It's too embarrassing.

I opened my mouth and tried to talk but nothing came out. Just like how I try at home. Nothing…

Sasuke acts as if he doesn't worry but I know he does. Sasuke talks to me like this hoping that one day I'll answer him, he keeps the hope alive for the both of us. If I could I'd tell him he's stupid but I can't.

Instead I sigh and put up my hand to the sky. I'm not traumatized so why did I stop speaking. What could've happened to me ten years ago that made me stop using my voice?

"Come on we got two minutes until the bell rings." He says as he stands and offers me his hand. I look at it, why does he always offer me his hand when he knows I can get up on my own? I keep my gaze on his pale palm.

"It's easier to accept help then having to do everything alone," Sasuke admits. I shake my head and stand on my own without his help. I'm fine on my own. Sure my world is quiet but I like it just the way it is. Sasuke may be my friend but it doesn't mean I always need his help on everything. "Hinata must you be so difficult?" he asks in a semi-angry tone.

I nod looking at the grass. I can't find myself relying on people if I do I'll become weaker, I need all my strength to keep living.

"Today go by yourself to your next class," he says walking ahead of me. I stand here and watch his rigid back, if he knows I won't accept his hand then why does he always offer it?

Sasuke knows I won't take it yet he always gives it to me. Some days he'll get angry but other times he'll laugh about it and still walk me to the library.

My next class is library aide. I usually like being an aide because of Shiho-sensei is nice to me except that today there's a class coming in during fifth period. I drag my feet as I slowly make my way to the other side of campus. I move at a sloth's pace because I won't get in trouble if I get there late.

As I walk past Sasuke who is waiting for his teacher to come he is surrounded by guys and the girls are off the sides watching him with adoring eyes.

I look on and tilt my head in his direction he'd be the king of the school if he hung out with the popular crowd. Doesn't he want that?

Because I wasn't paying attention to where I was going I didn't notice that Sakura and Ino were in front of me and I didn't feel Sakura's foot in front of my slow moving feet. And so I fall on my knees and palms. I wince at the pain and I feel a few tears gather in my eyes.

"Opps! Sorry, I didn't hear you!" she then laughs at her own stupid joke. Ino snorts like the pig she is, I feel everyone's eyes on me as I stay on all fours. I silently shake in anger.

Instead of confronting her I just look up and glare at her.

"Oh! I'm scared!" she says in a sing song voice. "You know what would be perfect if her first words would be woof! Imagine and especially in that position. It would be wonderful!" she exclaims in a too loud voice and she claps. Everyone that hears laughs really loud as if she just gave the joke of the century.

"Oh, Miss President that would be classic!" Ino admits between laughs. Sakura smiles evilly as she bends a bit forward to me.

"Come on mute, say that one little word," she pouts her lips and does a small circle with her lips forming the silent word.

I look down feeling the tears gather in my eyes.

_Just one more year, just hold on until one more year_…

That's my very own mantra, I then feel the rest of the crowd circle around me, and they begin to shout out "woof" down at me. I grind my teeth together.

I want to shout our something, anything, but my throat just feels dry, no sound will come out, nothing.

God, it's so frustrating! Right now would be the perfect time to shout out something. To use the voice I've lost to say something to this crowd, anything! They yell out "woof" louder, some idiots even howl. I can feel Sakura's evil eyes stare down at me.

I stand and don't bother to wipe away the small rocks that are inside my scrapes. I grab my backpack and stand in the middle of the crowd. I glare at the underclassmen in front of me. They avoid my empty eyes and move aside. I feel someone grab my hair to keep me in place but I ignore them and take my first step away.

"Stay!" I hear Sakura's shrill voice above everyone else's but I ignore it. I continue to glare at everyone who's blocking my way and just like the Red Sea parted for that one guy, this crowd of clones does the same.

All the first years and some of the second years believe that I'm a witch. That I summoned the devil or something like that, it was the devil who took away my "tongue" so now I can't talk. So to get it back I have to collect souls and that if anyone looks into my eyes I'll take their soul away. They think that with one look into my empty eyes it will ensure that I take away their souls. Its bullshit but I still use it to my advantage. Kids these days are so gullible that it's amazing they are still alive. They believe anything they're told.

As soon as the person who grabbed my hair let's go I turn to look back and find strands of my hair in Ino's hand. She quickly lets them go and hides behind Sakura. She is one of the stupid kids who think I'm a witch.

The idiot Ino probably thinks she won't wake up tomorrow, I smirk at the thought.

I walk away with scrapes but proud of the outcome.

Usually I'm invisible except when I'm with Sasuke or when Sakura wants to pick on me, which is every day. Kids at school know who I' am but usually make it a point to avoid me. I hate any attention that's given to me. I just want to graduate in peace, I don't want any attention. None at all, can't I just be invisible?

I hate this…I let out another sigh. I walk up the outside stairs that lead up to the counselors offices outside of the main building and walk up to the side doors of the main building of the school. I hear the second bell ring as I pass the girls bathroom to my right which is located under the stairs that lead up to the second floor. I look to my right into the main hall where the principal's and vice principal's offices are located in the middle of the long corridor. I look forward to one of the four double doors' in the front of the main building that is both exits and entrances. The farthest one next to the library is hidden behind a corridor and if I'm correct it should be unlocked. If only I can walk out without being noticed…

"Ho ho! Hinata aren't we late to fifth period?" I hear the principal behind me, I look back to find a wooden pipe in the side of his mouth. He grins then blows into it and bubbles come out. "Ah, could another detention be in your future?" he asks raising both his eyebrows in question. I quickly shake my head, he grins and I hurry to the entrance of the library. I wave to the librarian and she smiles.

"Hello Hinata! It's good of you to join us!" I raise my eyebrow.

"Bullshit!" I hear a guy shout. I look to where the word came from and I see the same boy from bio standing off to the side of Shioh-sensei's desk. A thin smile comes onto her lips as she looks at me.

"We have a new student to help us," she manages to say in a low un-happy voice. "Hinata meet your new trainee," she stretches her hand out to the blonde haired boy. "Naruto Uzumaki."

I stop my jaw from hanging open as I keep my eyes empty and look at him. I then give him my back and walk to one end of the long wooden counter.

I won't react to him, I'm going to be the girl I always am; the empty shell of a teenage girl.

"Hinata," I look over at sensei's desk, "teach him the ropes okay?" I nod and sit down on the stool by the computer. I get comfortable making sure he understands that this cushioned stool belongs to me; since I have seniority because I've been library aide longer. "Go and join Hinata, Uzumaki-san, she doesn't bite."

"Or talk so how am I supposed to learn?" he questions sensei. I watch as an angry look comes onto sensei's usually happy face. She pushes up her glasses from down her nose.

"Uzumaki-san, Hinata may not talk but you sure as hell can understand her instructions!" she shouts as she stands from her chair. "If you don't like this class then I suggest you meet with your counselor to change this class for another."

"I would but that Pervert said I wasn't allowed to change not even one class since he chose them for me," he says in an angry tone.

"Pervert?" sensei asks perplexed.

"Ah, I mean vice principal Jiraiya," he corrects himself.

Shiho-sensei coughs and hits her chest with her open palm.

"I see, sorry," she mumbles sitting back down. I look over at the guy after a second he looks up to meet my empty lavender eyes with his lively cerulean eyes.

I hate him.

It doesn't matter to me that helped me before, right here right now I find myself hating him.

There's no reason other than I hate that look in his eyes.


	3. Demoralize

_**Just in case be sure to re-read Chapter 2!!!**_

_**I changed it!!!! Sorry!**_

* * *

**So Happily Unsatisfied**: Sadly, I changed the second chapter so the lunch won't come up until later, so sorry!!! I'm sorry! Thanks! I really wanted to show that Hinata is a different person that just because she doesn't talk doesn't mean she's shy…that she has no problems seeing through people and just "speaks" her mind; I plan to keep her like that.

Thanks, but I'm the one who should thank you! Because you are kind enough to take the time to leave a review there are so many people who read stories but never leave reviews, you my friend are one of the few that do, so I thank you very much!!!! And I really hope you do keep reading, thanks!

**imatwilightfan**: Thanks, I like to be funny, I should tell you though that I changed the chapter, I messed up and re-did it, I hope you like it! Actually in this story it isn't because she's shy that she closed off, it's because of something else…I can't explain further because then I'll ruin it for you, just keep reading and I'll slowly explain what is going on. True, she does! Yup, there will be a love triangle!!! Ah, there are three vice principal's it's: Tsunade, Jiraiya and Orochimaru, with Sarutobi as principal. I explain a bit in this chapter why he went away, Sasuke knows why Naruto left but Sasuke isn't the kind of boy who would give away Naruto's secret…although he did kind of blurt some of it out…I could tell you what he was doing, nothing just running away…do not worry, I love questions!!! So ask but there are times I won't be able to answer them because I could give away the story so I have to make sure not to give away too many secrets!!! Thanks for understanding, you are so great! Not to worry you are making total sense! Sorry I updated so late! I was kind of lost…hate to admit it but its true! I hope you approve of the newer version of chapter two and this one!! Thank you!

**rosa1817**: It makes me so happy! Thank you! Oh, thank you!!! You are very nice!!!

Ah, I' am truly glad that you want to read more!

Her father…that's always a tough person to write for but I promise you that you will find out why and who knows if you really want Neji to appear I can make it happen! But should he be the good guy or the bad?

Thanks, I hope you continue to want to read more and don't tire of this story, thanks!!!!!

**Hinata6**: So much thanks!!!! Actually only Sasuke knows Naruto, before Hinata never hung out with either boys it was only after she stopped talking that Sasuke came to her.

Yup, there will be a triangle!! So much fun…oh, I can't wait…

You sure know how to make me happy! And I'm not a great writer all though I do believe you are!!! Thanks for the awesome words though if you write that I'm a good writer then I feel I have to believe it!

So sorry I made you wait so long, just wanted to make sure you know though that I re-did the second chapter so you should probably read it first before this one.

* * *

**Chapter 3: Demoralize**

Somehow the side where the mute girl sits suddenly turned angry. I can sense it all the way over here. Her eyes and everything about her shows nothing but I can "smell" something in the air. Almost as if a storm is heading in her direction and is looming over her. I watch her and the girl doesn't look away.

The little hairs on the back of my neck go up in warning as I slowly make my way to Hinata. How could she avoid showing what she feels but I still sense it around her?

As I walk to her the atmosphere feels thicker than before. I feel as if I'm going to choke on the air.

"I'm sorry!" I blurt out, her eyes widen and her mouth opens a bit. "I'm sorry about what happened in bio, I was a jerk." I admit to her. The air becomes normal but I notice the weariness reflect in her eyes.

She gives me one curt nod to acknowledge that she has forgiven me. She points to the other door of the library where there's a slot on the other side but a box on the inside of the library. I walk to it and peer over it and see some books there, I look back at her and she nods. I grab them and bring them over to her.

The whole time her animosity filled eyes stay on me I back, I can feel them. She looks up into my eyes and something passes in them but it just as quickly disappears. I leave the books on the counter away from her, I hide my smile as she stays on the stool and she stretches her arms out, leaning towards the pile. Her arms don't reach; she sits up straight she looks down at the stool under her, then at the books, then at me. She does it again and I hide my smirk.

Either she's:

a) lazy

b) she's scared I'll take her stool or

c) She expects me to slide the books closer.

"So are you going to teach me the ropes or are you going to keep sitting there?" I ask irritated, she looks up at me then points at the books and taps down at the counter next to her. "Surely you aren't that lazy that I have to put the books right next to you?" I ask mildly amused. I expect her to blush and stand on her own to grab the books but instead she nods her answer. "So aside from the not talking, you're lazy too?" she nods proudly.

Seriously? She then brightens up and faces the computer she opens Microsoft Word and types quickly. I slide the books next to her as I walk up behind her. I lean forward and I feel the warmth of her back on my chest.

"'And I'm as slow as a turtle on top of being clumsy. I'm a failure at everything especially life,'" I read out loud.

How peculiar, I can't tell if she's lying or telling the truth.

I'm the guy who never admits there's something wrong. Ask me how I' am I'll always answer "fine, thanks." I'll never admit that my day was shitty or that life sucks, I don't have the luxury to complain.

Also if you tell me something I won't care. Tell me your gay and my response will be: "And I give a shit because…" or if you confess that you're going to commit suicide I'll respond: "I don't care leave me alone."

I mean if you want someone to sympathize with you then search somewhere else. Because you won't get it from me; I don't give a shit about anyone but me. Everyone else can go to hell.

So my usual responds of "and I give a shit because…" is forming on my lips but then I suddenly blurt out.

"I don't think so." Her back straightens even more and she types fast.

"'I know myself better, so I'm positive,"' I read out loud again.

"You aren't a failure." I suddenly say in an irritated tone. She turns slightly to the side to glance back at me and looks into my pissed off gaze. I feel her warm breath on my neck and I hold in my gasp. It surprised me.

I don't understand my reactions to her. First I ask for forgiveness which I never, ever say! That's because I'm never sorry about what I say or do. Then I'm trying to tell her that she isn't a failure. Who the hell am I?

"You know what?" I suddenly spit out. My pulse is racing and I feel my face getting hot. Her eyes don't change she keeps them devoid of any emotion. She's living but is dead on the inside. I want to grab her and shake her until she realizes how lucky she is to be alive. She makes me care about her even before myself. And that in its self scares the shit out of me. "I don't give a shit," I finally say what I should've said before I talked to her. I step away from her and walk to the librarian's desk. "May I go to the bathroom?" I force my voice to come out normal.

"Yes, of course, here," she hands me a wooden name plate that has _bathroom pass_ written on it.

"No thank you," I say stepping away from the disgusting thing. It's painted in all bright neon green if the lights were off I'm positive it would glow, that's how bright it is.

"You have to take it or else you will get in trouble." She stretches her arm out further to me. I grab it and give her my back. I don't look over at the Hinata as I walk out the door.

There are certain people I don't associate with; I make it a point to avoid them, such as:

a) Troubled teens

b) People with problems

c) Family troubles

d) Suffering kids

e) Anything with the words: suffering, trouble, problems, parents, hurt, etc.

My problems are my own I don't ask for help and don't want it. So I expect anyone else to keep their problems to themselves.

This chick screams out all of those…

Maybe the old me would help her out but…things happened that hurt me and now I only care about myself. I don't want to continue to be disappointed.

"Naruto!" I look around me wondering who called out to me. I then see a laughing Jiraiya standing in the open door. "Hey kid! So how have you liked your first day of school Naruto?" He questions me with a smile.

"Fuck off you perv!" I shout. "You don't give a shit you just want me to tell you if there are any hot chicks in this school!" his eyes go big and reflect the surprise at being discovered by me. "You can't get with any of them, it's against the law!"

"Look dork, I just want to watch them that's all maybe an ass grab or a boob check, or watching as they run track, maybe even a game of volleyball while they wear no bra's, or I peep in on them as they take a shower…" he's day dreaming, I can tell, "but that's all!" he is honestly disgusting.

"What is this vice principal Jiraiya?" I hear granny's voice from behind him. He starts to shake in horror and his eyes look into mine they reflect how terrified he is and they beg me to save him from granny's evil clutch. "Hello Naruto, how has it been?" she asks me ignoring the perv but her hand grabs his shoulder and he shrieks like a girl.

"Uneventful," I lie, she nods. "I should go, the bathroom is calling." I hide my smirk as I side step Jiraiya's shaky hand as he reaches out to me.

"Naruto you traitor!" Jiraiya cries out, I just wave him off. This is the least he could suffer for putting me in the same freaking period as that chick. The only fucking class with just two students; in a place so boring that all you can do to make the time pass sooner is talk. And the one student who doesn't talk…shit if it wasn't me I'd laugh my ass off…

Shit! Now it's going to be harder to stay away from her.

* * *

"So as much as I'd like to tell him to drop this class I can't," I look at Shioh-sensei. "Hinata don't say that! I can't ask him that! Want to know why? Because Naruto is vice principal Jiraiya's chosen student, just like you are vice principal Tsunade's and Uchiha-san is vice principal's Orochimaru's." I smile at sensei. She is one of the few that treat me like a normal student that speaks. All the V.P.'s (vice principal's really it's easier to call them V.P.'s then the whole thing) and a few sensei's don't pressure me into talking.

That's why I like it here well the students could be better but other than that I like this school.

I look at the library door just as it opens and fellow students walk into the library. I look back at the computer screen and start doing the books that have been returned. I feel the student's eyes on me as they pass me.

I look up as I feel Sasuke's eyes on me; I look into them and see the uncertainty in them. I do what always puts him at ease and smile at Sasuke I watch him take in a breath and a small smirk comes onto his attractive face. My eyes look away sensing those eyes that I hate and sure enough I see the blonde haired boy there watching me. My smile fades as a cynical look comes onto his face. I hold my breath wondering why he's looking at me like this.

He looks like the type of guy who confronts people, not holding anything back so I keep holding my breath waiting. But when he just passes by me and avoids my gaze I gasp finally breathing.

Even as I look down at my cold trembling fingertips I become aware of Sasuke's all-seeing eyes on me. What does he see on my face? I always hide what I feel but because of the blonde haired boy I'm not sure what my face is expressing.

"Hinata!" I jump up and the stool tips to the side and next thing I know I fall to my side on the hard carpet floor. My face feels hot as I grow embarrassed. I hear the students laugh. Some even snort but none ask how I'm doing. I should get used to it but it still hurts, you know? I blink back the tears that threaten to fall.

I'm the kind of girl that hides everything, there are days that I feel like shit yet I act like I always do, I don't react to anything. Other days I'm bold and I defend girls that are being bullied, they never thank me but there are times some will whisper their thanks then run off. Those days are the best. I'm an insignificant human being, I'm not meant for greatness I know it yet, I still…wish for it…

I get that it's ridiculous, a girl like me isn't meant to be someone, and I'm just me. I'm a quiet girl who wants to blend in. I want to be asked after, I want people to understand that just because I act as if I don't care doesn't necessarily mean it's true.

I'm a paradox, I know it…but I still want someone to care about my well-being…someone who would stand up for me, to urge me to ask for help, just someone who doesn't give up on me…it's stupid of me to think of this now.

I'm fine, just one more year to go, I'm fine. The wind was knocked out of me, I stay here and take deep breathes.

"Hinata," I hear Shiho-sensei call out to me. The floor softly vibrates under me as she walks to me, "honey are you all right?" she whispers in a concerned voice. My eyes close again the tears threaten to fall once more because Shiho-sensei cares about me. She kneels down at my head. "Oh, honey its okay."

_Don't worry everything is okay._

The hot tears slide out of my tightly shut eyes, I couldn't hold them in any longer. My lips tremble as I begin to sob.

I never cry in front of people. I feel I must hide my weak side from these cruel kids that tease me for not being able to talk.

So I hate myself more for doing this in front of them. I haven't even cried in front of Sasuke. But a lot of things have added up and I couldn't hold it in any longer. Shioh-sensei stands suddenly and offers me her hand, I don't need help.

If I fall I get back up by myself. But as I look up at her blurry outstretched hand in front of me, I see a lifesaver that's been thrown at me as I fight to survive in the violent and crashing waves of the ocean.

So I take it and before I can be viewed by the pathetic students she hides my face in her chest and turns around giving my back to all the students. She leads me to the back of the library away from the laughing crowd.

"Shh, everything's fine, it's alright," sensei whispers as she slides her hand down my hair.

Sensei hugs me tightly to her she doesn't let go of me even after she sits me down on the chair that's back here where all the school issued textbooks are stored.

"Shh, everything's fine, shh," sensei softly repeats as she continues to move her hand up and down my long hair.

_Shh, everything's fine just promise me you won't tell the truth._

What…

"Hinata?" I don't look up at Sasuke I keep my face buried in sensei's flat chest.

"Uchiha-san please wait outside," sensei softly orders him.

"I can't," he admits, I open my mouth to yell at Sasuke to leave me alone but no noise comes out.

I would think that at least whimpers or some kind of noise would escape my mouth but zilch. I mean even when I sigh no sound is heard.

I want to scratch up my throat, I want to be heard, and I'm so frustrated.

This is the first time ever that I've really desired to talk or scream anything would be fine. I mean even a squeak would be better than nothing.

So because I'm a failure I just shake my head quickly.

"Hinata doesn't want you here," sensei speaks for me. "Just understand and leave."

"Hinata…" he whispers to me.

"Uchiha-san get out!" sensei shouts surprising me. I can imagine the look of shock on his face, I could even laugh.

I don't sense him so I'm sure he's left already.

My arms slowly go around senseis back as I return her hug. After a long time of me just crying and hugging sensei I let o of her and my hand goes to my back to grab her hand and I squeeze her wrist.

She lets go of me and I wipe away the tears the keep falling.

"Are you sure?" she asks me, I nod and try to give her a reassuring smile but it crumbles as my lips tremble, I bite down on my lower lip. I look into her thick glasses and nod. "Okay," she says after I keep eye contact for a long time. "Take the time you need." She says then squeeze's my right shoulder as she walks away. I hear as she stops at the doorway to look back at me and she stays a bit before leaving.

Something has been bothering me, what is it about Shiho-sensei's comforting words that has me remembering someone's voice but not the actual guy?

Why does my heart feel so weak as I try to recall the man?

I have no trauma that would cause me to stop talking but I feel as I'm forgetting someone and something that was really important…not sure what's making me feel this…could it be my intuition?

Nothing psychological occurred to me, nothing.

* * *

I look up at the librarian as she comes back into the library. She doesn't look up and she seems to be deep in thought as she absently walks to her desk and sits down.

"Hey Naruto!" I look behind me and find the blonde haired girl with the grinning pink haired girl behind her. "How great was that?!" she asks visibly excited as she smiles. "So Sakura after eight years of bullying Hinata it looks like the 'robot' is finally breaking down! Her fake strength could only keep her going for so long." She says with her back to me then whirls around with a huge happy smile. "See Sakura's life has been spent on breaking Hinata's will, never once has she cried, or showed anger, she hasn't even tried to retaliated. Nothing! Even before this class, she tripped Hinata and Hinata just blankly stared up at Sakura. You would think Hinata would show how angry she is or cry but nope! No reaction at all! If it wasn't so annoying I'd find it kind of admirable you know? After years of torture from our part she would never react. Only those freaky-looking-dead-fish-eyes would look back. And now finally she started to cry! Oh what a great day!" she says as she high fives the pink haired chick that tried to come on to me.

"Oh, Ino, such praise! Thank you, thank you!" she says with a small pageant like wave. Students around softly applaud Sakura and congratulate her.

Fuck, this is disgusting, I look away unable to hide how sick I feel. I then glance at the guy Hinata smiled at. I find him glaring at us.

What the hell is his problem? He walks to us and pushes both girls, the blonde one loses her balance and falls while the other seems like she's used to it.

"You fucking whores! How dare you act as if-" he stops suddenly, he looks back over his shoulder at me. "I see you haven't changed at all asshole."

I stare at him wondering who the hell he is. I glare at him then walk away not wanting to cause attention to myself. He's crazy.

"Yeah, like always you come before anyone else right? Are you proud that you came out so much like your mother? Just walk away like she did!" I stop mid-step. I feel every single pairs of eyes on my frozen body.

"Shut the fuck up!" I scream out, I whirl around to face this dark haired and black eyed guy. "Who the fuck are you?" I ask in a low threatening voice as I walk back to him. His eyes widen surprised but then an evil smirk comes onto his color-less lips.

"Now you don't remember me?" he asks my eyebrows go up rising in question. "But you prefer to exploit people's own secrets before your own. How does it feel to have someone you don't even remember know your deepest secrets?" I was going to say something but suddenly he walks away and goes towards something.

I look back and my eyes lock on with Hinata's, that dead look is still present. But something has changed and I suddenly realize what it is. Her blank eyes are showing something…pity…

This chick, the one who doesn't speak pities me?!

I can't fucken believe it; I call bullshit, her of all people. I won't accept it!

"God why are you so cruel? It hurts! Sasuke-sama hates us!" the pink haired girl cries out.

"Is that new?" I hear a lazy reply, I look over and sure enough I see the pineapple haired guy. "Sasuke's never liked either of you." He says in a matter-of-fact tone. They sob in each other's arms.

"We know!" they cry out.

"I think they are crazy," he says to no one in particular.

I look around us and just notice the rest of the class is circled around the four of us, they start to wander away but some decide to stay close, just in case.

This whole school is disgusting.

Even now as I lay in my futon in my one room apartment at night, I still feel that icky-ness. It's almost as if I have this thin layer of trash on me and it doesn't matter how much I scrub myself, it won't go away.

I turn to my side to look at my empty apartment.

How could that guy know me?

I don't remember him at all. Should I?

My stomach acid feels like it's going up in my throat.

Fuck, I don't want to go to school tomorrow.

How could they bully the girl like that? And why doesn't she just give in instead of always acting as if nothing bothers her? Does she have that much pride?

How does she do it? Because I can't have pride in myself; how could I after I watched my father kill himself?


	4. Different

**Adelaide 'Adell' Peirce**: Thanks!!! I know don't worry though she'll appear later and will be understanding of Hinata. They'll be close. Here you go!!! Thanks for the review!!!

**rosa1817**: Ah, I feel evil for bursting your bubble but that was Naruto's narration, so he was the one who saw his father die not Hinata. Her dad appears in upcoming chapters. So sorry, I thought it was kind of clear.

Hanabi is in the story and she will be close to Hinata. Yeah, I decided that Neji will appear in the story later on.

Sasuke doesn't really have any problems he's the "normal" one in this story, kind of ironic considering. Itachi…well I can't give too much away you'll kind of get a little look in on him so to say…

Yup, they totally are, I feel they're too mean though maybe I should tone it down a bit…

Yeah I think I'll do a few flashbacks for Sasuke and Hinata.

Lots of things happened to poor Naruto.

Don't worry I love questions!!! But sorry I couldn't really answer them!!! Thanks, I love it when you guys are patient and understanding!!! Thanks! I'm glad you find it good, I need tons of work on my writing!!! I totally really do thank you for taking the time to review, mostly no one reviews anymore. So much thanks on my part!

**weecheese5**: That could totally happen if you really want it, if she did kick their asses maybe they'll become silent and won't say anything like Hinata!

Thanks for thinking that!!!! I hope I didn't make you wait too long! I really appreciate that you took the time to leave me a review, thank you!

**imatwilightfan**: Hello again!!! No problem! I mean if you take your time to leave me a review the least I can do is reply and give my thanks!

Was it really! You are too nice!!! Much thanks, the way you worded it made me totally feel like I was smart or something! Now because you made me feel smart I think of you as a friend!!! Thanks!!!! Yeah, in this chapter I write a bit about Naruto and Sasuke's connection, Tsunade mentions a bit about his past but I mentioned a bit in chapter 3 but I won't fully tell Naruto's story until…well I can't tell you now I'd ruin it for you!

I hope this was soon enough!!! Thanks! You take care too and I really do appreciate all the reviews you leave me for my stories, thank you!

**kigome ibaki**: First I would like to thank you for reviewing every chapter of this story, I totally and I mean totally appreciate and thank you for that! You so rule!!!! Thanks!!!!!!!!!!!!! Now I love when my friends use caps like that!!! Ah, I'm excited and want to make the story sadder to get you to continue to use the caps!!!!! Don't worry I'll continue to write the chapters!!! I have about two more and I'm working on chapter seven just for you!

* * *

_**Sadly this may be my last update for awhile…I have up to chapter six written out…but hopefully my classes at college won't be too time consuming…**_

_**Hope you guys like it!!!**_

* * *

**Chapter 4: Different**

School life isn't what I expected, I mean as a new student I predicted that everyone would ignore me after a week but that isn't the case.

Instead I have been "allowed" to be a part of the in-crowd that's an "honor" in itself.

The thing about school is that…I'll put it simple: I hate it.

I hate how these guys think they can do anything without getting in trouble. And the disgusting thing is that they do. No teachers tell them anything, the V.P.'s and the damn principal are busy in "meetings" but I know the truth.

They drink sake all morning so in the afternoon they are holed up in their offices sleeping it off.

Right now I stand off to the side of the wall where Sakura and Ino are ganging up on some first year. I look away from them as I glance at the table where I sit during lunch.

The usual people are there; Shikamaru who sits next to Chouji, Gaara sits on the table next to ours alone as he glares at anyone who comes close. Temari sits in front of Shikamaru with TenTen who's always on her cell phone with her boyfriend who's at some university. Kankuro is talking to Kiba as he does motions with his hands as he tells a story. Kiba eats his lunch as he listens intently to Kankuro. It turns out that there was another guy but because he told Sakura off she got the rest of them to go against him. Gaara and he are still friends though. I've wondered about what happened but I haven't asked anyone. Temari gets up and glares at the two girls.

"God you two bitches need a fucken life," she says. "Are you seriously that lame that you have to pick on that child? What did Hinata do this time?" she questions them. Finally I can escape. I don't even know why I come with these two when they ask if I want to walk with them.

Everyone else is pretty cool but those two. Even Ino isn't that bad when she's alone. But it's practically never.

Sakura is the fucken cancer of the school. Everyone seems to hate her but no one does anything to stop her.

I just want a peaceful life without complications but it seems I can't get that.

Fifth period was my most dreaded class but now it isn't. It's the one class I can relax in. Hinata and I have come to an understanding; we don't "talk" to one another. She works the computer and checks out the books, I handle putting the books back in the shelves and anything that requires physical labor.

I sit next to Gaara, he stops his glaring to look at me, I glance at him and he turns away.

"Gaara," I say his name and he doesn't look over at me. "Why don't you sit with everyone else?" I ask him as I look over at Sakura who is talking to Ino. It's been a month since I got here and I haven't talked to Gaara in all that time.

"I don't like them," he bluntly tells me, I choke back my laughter.

"But you still sit next to them," I point out after I clear my throat.

"No, I don't." he leaves no room for arguing. I pause wondering if I should ask him. He looks down at his lunch. "Ask," he orders me, I look at him and he stares up ahead.

"The other guy who used to hang out with you-"

"Shino," he cuts me off as he turns his head to look at me. "His name is Shino Aburame." I nod slowly.

"Shino," I repeat slowly, "what did Shino do that caused everyone to kick him out of here?"

"You know Sakura gets mad when people ask about the incident," he tells me; I shrug my shoulders a small smile comes on to his lips. "Well he couldn't take it any longer. Shino stood up to Sakura calling her out on her bullying of Hinata. As kids both Shino and Hinata were close. But when she turned to Sasuke instead of him it hurt Shino so before as kids Sakura would pick on Hinata he would defend her but after that he stopped trying with Hinata, he just gave his back to the bullying. But last year he was passing a crowd, and it got his attention so he went to the front of the crowd and saw Sakura hitting Hinata there in front of a class room. Even the teacher of the class stood inside watching through the window. Shino watched for a bit and he noticed Sasuke was busy talking to someone and his back was to the fight.

Shino looked back and noticed Hinata's eyes directed at him. Even if they hadn't talked to one another, he knew the look. She was asking for his help. So he stepped forward and grabbed Sakura and threw her to the ground. Sakura told him off…long story short: she told him that because of his action he wouldn't be allowed to hang out with us. He didn't care and Shino just walked away with Hinata." Gaara finishes as he takes a sip of his chocolate milk.

I keep to myself at first, having some questions I'd like to ask but decide against them. There aren't many people who would defend someone with the risk of becoming an outcast.

"You should be careful," Gaara suddenly says I look over at him. "Think before you decide to help Hinata. If you defend her against Sakura you'll have the whole school against you. The favorite past time of all the idiots from this school is making Hinata suffer. That peaceful life you were planning on could come to a screeching halt."

"But that one loser is with her," I blurt out before I could stop myself.

"Sasuke is different though," he tells me before leaving. I watch him walk away from here with such ease. Will it be like that for me?

Should I decide to give up on my peaceful life to help some girl who can't even thank me?

Fuck I shouldn't think this shit! I don't want to help anyone, because when I needed help I found myself alone and no one lending a hand.

I hear the bell ring and I grab my stuff saying bye to everyone and making my way to the library. I walk into the library and find it empty, I put my backpack under the long wooden counter and notice the pink post-it on the computer screen I go to it and read it.

"H & N: I had something to do, V.P. Tsunade will come in for me, I expect the two of you to do what you normally do."

I sigh and walk to one of the six rectangle tables, there are six round tables around too. Each table sits four. I throw myself in the chair and rest my forehead on the table.

It turns out that Hinata and I have all six classes together. Four of those are with the idiot.

I don't understand whose sick joke this belongs to but I'm unhappy about it.

I mean I can and do resist any girl but there's something about Hinata that's different…

I won't think more about it.

Even if my back is to the library entrance, I can still sense when Hinata walks in. My skin tingles and my heartbeat quickens realizing that she's here. I don't understand my reactions to her.

But it always happens whenever Hinata walks in to a room, and when those emotionless eyes look at my back I know it. I don't understand how but I know when she's looking at me even though she always sits all the way in the back and I find myself in the front.

I now become aware of her gaze on my back, my skin on the spot where her eyes are on starts to feel funny. She removes her eyes off of my back.

I've learned a few things about Hinata as I've observed her. One is that she never reacts to anything. Just yesterday Shiho-sensei asked her to walk across campus to a classroom to collect some books, she was given a cart. She made no face as she took the cart and slowly left the library. When the bell rang she still hadn't returned. I said bye and left and I saw her in the middle of a crowd and they pushed her, she didn't react. Even when someone made the cart fall over she kept her face emotionless. I passed by her and she didn't look up at me as she slowly picked up the large textbooks.

The second thing about her is that she only smiles when she's with that one guy. Thirdly she's made fun of by the teachers too. There are about four teachers that don't but the other two find her game.

And lastly she's the fucken priest of the school. I saw this one girl who earlier said something that caused the group of girls that was with her watch Hinata. Then as I was putting away some books the very same girl is talking to Hinata about some secret, I could tell by the way the girl would glance at me making sure I didn't hear anything she said. Other kids come in to talk to Hinata. She pretends to listen but I can tell that she isn't paying attention.

I could be wrong but when she doesn't look at the person who is talking it means she isn't paying attention. I've caught her doing that to everyone well except with Sasuke that is when she looks at him.

Even now I can hear someone mumbling to her. I lift my head to look back at them. Some guy is talking to her as she faces the computer. She nods as she keeps her eyes on the screen.

She then turns to look over at me, her head tilts to the right just a bit to watch me, and then I give her my back once more.

"Student!" I look back at the open door and see granny Tsunade there, "what the heck are you doing here? Are you harassing Hinata?" the boy becomes pale and steps away from the counter. He shakes his head; he can't seem to form words…kind of ironic if you ask me. "Get out then," she says stepping in and he runs out, I grin.

"He was confessing his sins to the priest," I speak up.

"Naruto? What the hell are you doing here?" granny yells at me.

"I'm in this class," I respond giving her my back.

"Bullshit!" she yells. I turn my head back as Hinata sighs and slowly nods. "Really? That's a shock; I thought for sure Naruto would never step in here." Hinata smiles and I sigh; today will be a long day… "What does that brat mean by the kids confessing to you?"

I hear as she types something and granny goes to her to read.

"What did she write?" I ask.

"That you are an asshole and she wishes you'd die," I grin to myself.

"Liar," I announce. "I wonder what the Board of Directors would think if they heard you speak to me like this."

"They would award me a medal of honor," Tsunade responds. "Hinata said: 'people in school tell me their secrets because I can't talk so I won't spill their secrets to other students. They want to let their secrets out and decide that I'm their best choice.'"

"Also because you relax them," I speak up. "There's something about you that causes everyone to trust you."

Tsunade and Hinata don't respond as they watch me.

"What?" I shout out defensively, I feel my face heat up, "it's obvious!" But neither says anything as they just stare at me.

I get up and walk behind a bookcase and hide behind it. Shit! Why did I even open my stupid mouth?

* * *

"Did you know Naruto is a jerk?" V.P. Tsunade whispers, I nod as I direct my gaze over at the bookcase where he's hiding behind. "He wasn't like that before…he used be a wonderful kid before…" she pauses, I turn to look at her and the expression she had on changes showing her sorrow and pain. "Stuff that I shouldn't talk about, he ran away as a kid and no one could find him. That is until Jiraiya heard of it and searched for him like crazy. Naruto has huge problems; I mean the size of a mountain. But I thought the kid I knew was gone but it seems that stubborn boy still exists. This is going to be fun!" Now she looks happy, I type my question.

"'What does that have to do with me?'" she reads out loud. She then turns her light blue eyes at me and I quickly notice that mischievous gleam in them.

"That has yet to be seen," something about the tone she uses makes me feel a bit scared. "Don't worry just continue being you," she says smiling.

"Sorry vice principal Tsunade! I'm back!" I hear Shiho-sensei say out of breath I look over at her as she pushes her glasses up her nose.

"That wasn't long," Tsunade says. "Well Hinata I'll see you around. Later Naruto!" she says. He ignores her and she laughs. I get off of my stool to walk to the return box. I start to check the books into the computer then I sense him standing next to me.

"I don't get you," he tells me softly, I keep doing my work. "I mean everyone treats you like shit yet you still sit there as they tell you their secrets. How do you do it without getting angry?" he asks me.

Today is the first day that he's talking to me since his first day coming here. I just look at him a bit longer. His eyes don't give anything away like mine. It's almost as if he guards his emotions just as much as me.

I suddenly understand why he did it, the ignoring me for a month, and the truth is that it terrifies me. I don't comprehend why but it does. I should do the same thing he did to me; I should give him my back and ignore him.

But I can't, he came to me…he made the effort and I should do something so that he won't give me his back again.

I thought I could live with Sasuke alone but for some reason I think…

_They don't know any better,_ I type. _Sakura is a bully who hates me and so they all think they should hate me too. Plus I don't even listen to them._ I honestly answer him.

"Why does she hate you?" he asks me.

_There are several factors would you like them all or a summary?_ I type quickly.

"All," he responds quickly.

_Okay! Here's the list of why:_

_1. I'm prettier than her without all the make-up she uses._

_2. Everyone secretly likes me more than her_

_3. My breasts are totally bigger than hers._

_4. An accident in elementary school which involved: frogs, worms, glue, poison ivy, a jack-in-the-box and her peeing her pants…_

_5. Sasuke is always with me._

_6. Because I don't give into her bullying. I always manage to keep my head held high even when she does her worst._

_7. But above all else I ruined her favorite shoes when I pushed her in a puddle_

_I think the last one is the real reason that she hates me so much._

"Totally weird that you can be funny…" he mutters. "Number four has me truly curious," he admits, I look back and sure enough he has a smile on his mouth. "It's your pride isn't it?" he suddenly asks me. My mouth opens as I take in a breath of surprise.

How does he know me so well? My hands slightly tremble.

_Sasuke_, I start off, _tells me that I have too much pride and that I should just give into Sakura at least once and she'll leave me alone. But I just can't…_

"Don't," Naruto orders me, "and above all else never give into her. That would be the worst. You can never have too much pride, remember that." The voice he uses has me wondering where this is coming from. "Are these ready to be put back?" he asks me, I nod slowly. He grabs them and walks away from me.

I keep my eyes on his back. He's hiding something I don't understand what or how I know but I do…

The thing Sasuke said has me curious about Naruto.

I think back to what he told me during lunch the day after I cried.

"Stay away from Naruto," Sasuke tells me as we walk to the football field behind the gym. I turn to look up at his angry face. "The jerk doesn't remember me but I do. He's the bad guy, Hinata. The kind dad's warn their daughters about. Don't trust him with anything because the next thing you know he'll use it to his advantage. That guy is ruthless and only thinks of himself. Trust me and don't get close to him."

Sasuke only has bad things to say about Sakura so for him to speak ill of Naruto has me with unanswered questions. It seems Sasuke knows Naruto but Naruto doesn't.

"Hinata?" I look up and see Sasuke, I smile at him and he grins back. It's a habit of mine to smile at him. "Is the book I asked for here already?" I nod and jump off my stool to go get it.

* * *

I stretch my head out from behind a large bookcase.

Why is he so familiar? I feel like I know him…

My life before…I used to spend summers with a family that my dad knew.

I start to make my way over to him, he's just so…

"Uchiha?" I call out to him, "that's your last name right?" he looks over his shoulder back at me.

"What now you remember you ass?" he questions me his voice holds a slight edge but he doesn't look mad.

"Oh shit! You were that bratty-bossy kid who refused to be nice to me! You were such a jerk when we were younger!" I say loudly.

"You weren't so nice either," he says turning his body fully to me and he crosses his arms over his chest, a smug look comes onto his face.

"I was nice! You could've reminded me, you know my memory is awful!" I admit.

Sasuke Uchiha was my first and only friend. He knows my past and never thought less of me because of it. He was there for me when everything went down and he was the only person I told that I was running away. He didn't stop me and he understood I needed to get away.

"It took you longer than I anticipated. Honestly you are slower then Hinata," he says with a smile.

"How's your family?" he suddenly looks away from me to the single door that leads to the storage room for the library.

"Not here," he says tersely. His cool and calm expression cracks and he shows that he's grown worried, afraid, and agitated. Suddenly Hinata comes back holding a book; she looks up at Sasuke and notices his expression. She turns to look at me and the anger she feels reflects in her eyes.

"I did nothing!" I say suddenly throwing up my arms.

"Hinata, did I tell you that this idiot and I go way back? And that we were friends as kids?" she looks from Sasuke to me and back again. She doesn't understand what went on.

"I used to spend my summers with Sasuke," I begin to explain to a bewildered Hinata. She looks away from Sasuke and keeps her gaze on me. "This guy was my…I admired him as a child. Sasuke was a bastard to me but then from one day to another we became friends, crazy times…" I admit with a fond smile.

Her expression suddenly changes and she happily smiles at me. I reach for my camera but it doesn't hang around my neck anymore.

I forgot that I don't bring it with me anymore. I don't feel inspired to take pictures anymore but right now I wished I had it to capture this magical face in front of me. I start to memorize every emotion that's being expressed in her eyes, how wide her smile is everything. I'll memorize every single detail.

She looks away from me to look over at Sasuke whose face and eyes show nothing. Sasuke directs his eyes to me then to Hinata.

"What's the matter?" I ask.

"Your popular right?" he asks out of nowhere, I raise my eyebrow at him.

"Yes," I answer slowly.

"Do all those idiots like you?" he continues to question me.

"I'm generally liked," I answer.

"Are you willing to test that theory out?" he asks me with a smirk. I suddenly take a step back growing a bit scared. It's the same look he had when we were kids, that look caused me to got lost in the woods for a day, and that time I lost my eyebrows because of the "experiment" he wanted to test on me, or that one day where all the cats in the alley's followed us home…it's the "scary" expression that I was afraid of…

"What do you have in mind?" I question him in a low voice.

"You'll find out tomorrow," Sasuke says with another smirk, and then he grabs the book from Hinata. "Thanks!" he walks away from us and leaves through the only entrance.

Both of us stand here watching as the door slams close.

I turn my head to look at Hinata, her head is tilted and a thoughtful look comes onto her face.

"Do you know what he has in mind?" she turns to look at me in the eyes and she shakes her head. "Well I'll guess I'll find out tomorrow." I say growing a bit worried.

There are times when Sasuke can be unpredictable and does things he shouldn't. I have a feeling this is what is happening now or tomorrow to be exact...


	5. Tears

**imatwilightfan**: See before when I read "Ohayo" I was all like what's that? But now I know! So now I say: Konnichiwa, hajimemashite.

No need to say thanks, it's the least I can do for you guys, no you haven't mentioned it but other people have told me this. I've read stories so I notice how other authors list the people who review sometimes as thanks. But I feel that I should take my time and reply to what you have to say, cuz sometimes the questions you ask or the things you guys say make me want to reply!!! Plus, I like to talk to my readers; I'm very vain and need to hear how much you guys enjoy my stories!!! So yup, it's kind of personal interest, so to say. To me it isn't so simple I like to talk and write so I make everything longer so that I can take more time responding to you, but then if I get like 15 or like for Just a Betrayal I would always lag it because I was too lazy but when I have a few reviews then I tend to make my replies longer…see I'm doing it now…yup you'd have to consider me a friend because it would just make you look bad if you said no!

Yup, they are now! No wink wink!!!! At least not yet!!! Or I wonder are you thinking about…_you know wink wink_…or like? See now I'm befuddled… For Naruto he now feels when she watches him and is realizing things about her as he watches her. Ah you'll have to wait to find out! Ah, but Hinata totally mentioned them!! In the list she made for Naruto. But I'll enlighten you further in later chapters.

Thanks you take care too!! Hopefully I'll be able to update faster now since some of my classes are ending next week and I'm jobless!!!! So yup now I have time! Thank you for letting me bother you!!!! And I totally thank you for your review!!!!!!

**CheezingIt54**: I like cheese…and I like your icon, it's a cute little kitty, like how my huge cats were three years ago…oh how time flies by…wait you don't want to hear this do you? Sorry!!!!

Okay now to your review! I know it would be, but how would I add all those things…see I just chose random things but now I feel I have to do it because you asked for it, but it'll have to wait!

I think I have been asked that, but what I'll say now is that it's a little of both, because there will be times when it's a Hinata and Sasuke chapter or a Hinata and Naruto chapter, it depends really on what I'm feeling at the moment but in the long run it'll be a…so I can't tell you you'll have to guess!!!!!! I know I suck but I hate running stuff for people well unless you're my sister!!! Because it's fun to burst her bubble!!!

Thank you and I'm sorry, I'm sorry once again for making you wait so long, I'd totally understand if you gave up on it!!!

* * *

_**So I've returned and hopefully I'll be here until January when the new school semester starts!!**_

_**Before you read anything, it's…well this chapter is one reasons why it's rated "M" for MATURE READERS, I'm sorry if I offend some of you guys, but this is real you know. **_

_**No one can turn their backs on rape and pretend it didn't happen, it did and you should report it! Sorry it's just that some people get offended when there's a rape scene in a story but its life you know? Life can't be all about love and laughing there's more. **_

_**Just remember if you keep quiet about rape then it's bound to happen to another girl by the same guy who did it to you, just think, and don't be ashamed about it happening, it wasn't your fault, no of it was.**_

_**Some of you guys might be wondering why I have so many "…" well to me they are used for when the character's thoughts aren't finished, or you know when you think of so many things at once? That's what the characters go through; they have all this things that they're thinking about so their thoughts are jumbled up.**_

_**I thought I should clear that up with you guys!**_

_**By the way my keyboard on my laptop is missing the "g" and it's kind of hard typing without the g…**_

_**Oh, why didn't I notice that this chapter was so short? I mean I finished it in a day!**_

* * *

**Chapter 5: Tears**

Today is the tomorrow Sasuke mentioned yesterday. I've been watching Sasuke all through the day but he hasn't even talked to Naruto. Not even a good morning.

"Hinata," I look up at the same math teacher who hasn't given up on me. "Come up to the board and solve the problem." I shouldn't go up and do it but my feet move and I stand. I feel every pair of eyes on me. He gives me the marker and his fingers linger too long on my own.

I look away from him as I look at the white board, this problem…I never saw this kind of equation in the book.

My shaky hand goes up and I feel the teacher stand right behind me. He's too close and I can't concentrate. I start without even paying attention.

"No." he says as he steps closer, I feel his leg go up between my own, I get closer to the board and he follows after me.

The bell rings and I was about to drop the marker but he holds my fingers to it.

"Class dismissed except for you Hinata," he steps away and I stay here against the board. My breaths come out faster. My whole body shakes in fear.

Everyone walks away, I look at Naruto but he doesn't look at me as he talks to Shikamaru.

They all leave, no one looks at me…the first time I show feelings in my eyes and no one looks.

I need help. Sasuke ditched math and I'm here alone with Kabuto-sensei…I tightly shut my eyes as he comes closer. I can feel his smile as he closes the space between us.

* * *

I walk to Biology with the usual group.

"Isn't that teacher disgusting? He's totally checking out all the chicks and pretends to drop things to look at the girl skirts hoping to see something," I hear Chouji. "Will Hinata be all right alone?" he asks looking back.

I too look back at the closed door. He wouldn't try anything, would he?

I feel someone bump into me; I glare at the guy but its only Sasuke.

"Where's Hinata?" he asks me.

"She was held back by Kabuto-sensei," Chouji answers. Sasuke doesn't look at Chouji or at me. He stands here all stiff and he suddenly looks angry. He pushes me and runs for it shoving people out of his way.

"What the fuck?" I shout.

"Let's go after him," Shikamaru says, he runs and we all catch up to Sasuke. Sasuke pauses, almost as if readying himself for what he's about to see. "Asuma-sensei!" Shikamaru yells to our Japanese teacher, and he rushes over and we all look in as Sasuke opens the door.

My stomach drops as I look in. Hinata is being held down on the desk as Kabuto stands in front of her. She stays there motionless but I notice the faint bruises on her neck and blood on the side of her mouth and nose. Her blouse is ripped open.

The anger I feel is barely being contained. Before I can do anything Sasuke punches Kabuto. He falls and Hinata just lays there. Her eyes look dead. Sasuke takes off his jacket and throws it over her. She continues to lay there not moving.

"You were about to be rapped and you can't even cry or react?" I yell at her. She doesn't move and just stays there, is she dead?

She rises and grabs a marker. She uncaps it and writes.

_If I cry would it make me feel better? If I let these tears fall will they make this incident disappear? Would this not have happened? __What are tears? What does it help if you cry? It doesn't ease the pain so why does everyone say that if you let it out it'll make you feel better? Why do they lie? I cry but it doesn't help me at all…I hate crying I hate it because it makes me feel weaker, makes me feel vulnerable and I hate that feeling…I hate the feeling of vulnerability it makes me feel so open to everyone…I don't want to be open to anyone… _she writes. I stare at her the jacket that's on the floor, it covered her but now it's on the floor; I look away from the red and exposed breasts. I hear Asuma step away from us to walk to Sasuke who keeps beating the sensei. I hear the squeak from the marker. I look at the board. _Answer me! Do tears make everything better! Do they…does it help?_

I stand here then I take off my school sweater vest and walk over to her and put it on her. She stands here letting me mover her arms however I like. She looks so defeated…so gone…how can she…

"Crying helps," I look back at Shikamaru; he looks at Hinata in her eyes. "Tears do help let everything you hold in come out." She stares at him then slowly she lifts her arm and begins to write on the board.

_Are you sure?_

"Yeah, if I'm wrong then you can punch me," he says with a small smile. I see the tears in Shikamaru's eyes and Chouji quietly cries.

"Send the principal to classroom 34, there's an incident that he has to take care of. Tell him it has to do with Hinata." Asuma sensei says into the phone.

Her left cheek is swollen and I notice how the bruises begin to set in on her neck and arms. She has blood under her short nails.

At least she fought back…

This only happens in those hentai manga I read and even then the main girl ends up enjoying it. At least that's what I heard! It's not like I read them or anything.

Rape…it doesn't…I look over at the doorway to see a golf cart that is being driven by Jirayia and Principal Sarutobi sits next to him, Tsunade and Orochimaru sit in the back.

I look at the board and watch Hinata's shaky hand start to write.

_I don't talk, it's not because I have a hidden reason why, I don't. One day I just stopped, there's nothing more to it. I can't talk now, it's been too long and it's too late. My voice is gone and it won't return. I know because I began to scream as he ripped my blouse and cut my bra. I know I screamed! I know it but nothing…there was no sound! Nothing! I try and I keep trying to be heard but I can't! There's nothing there…_she admits to us. She falls on her knees and the marker drops to the floor. Hinata cups her face and silently cries.

"What is going on? Why is Kabuto laying there?" principal Sarutobi asks. Sasuke gets up and he wipes his bloody fists on his pants, he huffs and I see tears in his eyes.

No one says anything, we can't talk because we don't want to relive what went on, just a few minutes ago, we can't…

* * *

I sit in the principal's office, Shizune-sensei; the school nurse took pictures of me to show to the police. I don't want to press charges but I don't have a choice, I'm underage so everyone else decides for me…

I was given a new bra and a clean blouse. I still feel his hands on me…I don't react outside, I stay silent as the principal talks to me. I look at the cup of tea in front of me. I was hot when it was first put there, but now it's cold.

"Hinata, you did nothing wrong," I hear him say. "It's just he thought you were an easy target because you don't talk, that's why he targeted you. He knew you wouldn't say anything." He doesn't mention the other two times this has occurred…I don't care.

I only have one more year, just one…

"I called your dad," I look up at him now, "he's on his way." I want to say something. I look back and find a silent Sasuke in the corner of the office.

This is the third time he's stopped it, and it always affects him more than me.

I should stand up and hug him but then I hear a commotion and know that **he** is here. I sit up straighter in my chair and look ahead at the wall.

"What happened this time?" he asks right away getting to the point. He doesn't even look at me and I don't look at him. "Don't you understand Sarutobi, that I pay you so that I won't have to deal with this shit!" I hear him as he types something on his blackberry.

"Hinata was once more-" but the principal is interrupted by my father.

"Yes, I know it's happened before. What do you want me to do about it? She is the one who won't talk. She brings this upon herself," he proclaims.

"No, she does not!" I hear Sasuke shot. "Hinata does nothing wrong!"

I want to thank Sasuke to look back at him and smile but I don't.

What I feel and think doesn't reach my dad. I guess we aren't connected like most parents and children are. Over time I realized that my father doesn't love me, half of me didn't give a shit but the other half…it wanted to be loved by dad…I wanted him to accept me how I' am now, to stay with me through this silence.

Instead he kicked me out of the only home; I had so that I can live in a very expensive and exclusive apartment building. My apartment was furnished by one of his four secretaries.

I hate living there. Hanabi comes to visit me every once in a while when she isn't busy with her lessons. That is taught by the very same teachers that were grooming me into the "perfect" Hyuga heiress. I hated the lessons but Hanabi seems to like them. She always tells me that she'll bear my responsibilities for me; I love my little sister…Neji is off at University, he e-mails and leaves me messages on my answering machine whenever he comes home, he visits me.

My father has me isolated from them, Hanabi has to escape to visit me and Neji had to search for me at the school to see me. Father wants me existence to be erased. He wants me to give in and die…

He is one of the reasons I have so much pride. He's pushed me the farthest and I haven't given up. He hates it and me…

"This is private family matters why the hell are you in here?" my father asks Sasuke in a lower voice.

"Because I'm Hinata's only family," Sasuke responds. I turn to look back at Sasuke. He…I could really fall in love with him, if I wasn't already in love.

I look away, what did I just…

"Hinata!" I look over at my father who stands close to the only exit. "So this one was violent," he says looking my face and neck over. "She looks fine so why am I here?" he asks ignoring me.

That's it, from here until he leaves he's going to act as if I'm not in the room. He doesn't want to bother wasting his words on me since he now understands I won't talk.

I don't pay attention to their conversations as I focus all of my attention to the wall.

I…am in love? But…why do I hurt so much when I try to think about it? What is the cause of this pain?

"Hinata," my eyes grow big as I look over at my father. "I've given you ten years to grieve! Ten years in which the mystery hasn't been solved. The Uchiha's are constantly hassling me to get to you! I've hidden you away so you could have time. But you've had enough! I'm tired of babying you, you're weak but you won't break if I mention his name, now tell me what happened to It-" Sasuke suddenly screams out loudly.

I cover my ears and tightly shut my eyes. I drown out everything. I can't hear, I don't want to…I don't get why but I know I shouldn't hear this. I can't…if I do I'll…I'm not…I don't…

I open one eye to see Sasuke's angry face and my father's murderous expression. My dad grabs Sasuke by his shirt and pulls him to a wall and holds him up against it, Sasuke's legs dangle off the floor. Both of their mouths move but I can't hear anything, I close my eye again and I pull up my legs to my chest, I feel my breaths come out faster.

I flinch as I feel someone touch my shoulder. I pull away but that warm hand stays, my eyes open and I meet those cerulean eyes that I hate. I blink back my tears, his eyes; those eyes that I hate so much stare deeply into me. I can't look away my hands still cover my ears. I look down at his mouth as it moves.

My world is silent, I'm used to it, and there isn't a voice that reaches me. Even now I keep everyone out with all my might. I don't let anyone in to save myself.

I told Naruto that I know "me" better than anyone but it's a lie. I don't know who or what I' am, I don't get "me". What Sasuke said is true, there are pieces missing…

Because of this I stopped trying to let people in; to not let their voices reach me, in my silent and dark world.

But right now I hear his voice say. "It's alright, you're safe, and you aren't alone…"

How could I hear him? My ears are covered, his voice shouldn't reach me!

My core is shaken…he can't be allowed…he shouldn't come in…

I feel he can see the real me…I feel he could discover what I hide…

I don't want to know about anything!

I want to stay in my silent world, alone.

That's how it should be so why do I take my hands off my ears and let my tears fall as I reach for him…

Why did I give in? What is it about him that is growing on me? I'm not supposed to connect with anyone…

I look into his eyes that I hate and suddenly realize that I recognize his gaze…it's the one that looks back at me in the mirror…the one that's broken and lost...we have the same troubled eyes...how...why...it doesn't matter, none of it matters...

* * *

What compels me to reach out to this broken and voiceless girl? I shouldn't hold her like this.

I hate females, I hate them all! So why am I letting this girl use my chest to cry on? I want to pull away but I can't.

Naruto Uzumaki looks after himself only! That's who I' am! It's me, damn it! So why am I here hugging her? I should be far away.

I can picture myself on the cement lunch table with everyone as they laugh at Hinata. I sit there with a fake smile as Sakura talks shit on Hinata…

"Don't you want to know what happened to-" Sasuke stops the older man.

"Shut up! Don't you understand that Hinata shouldn't hear his name! I'll hold my family off so just shut up! She needs more time." Sasuke says loudly. "What she saw…or at least what I imagine she saw…it caused her to shut herself in…" Sasuke says as he looks me in the eyes. "As her father you should understand this but it seems you don't."

What could…but the look in Sasuke's eyes orders me to stay out. I look over at the long haired man; he must be Hinata's dad. He turns his angry gaze on me.

"Who are you?" he questions me, Hinata pulls me closer to her.

"No one," I reply looking away. I feel him watching us but he doesn't say anything further to either of us.

I feel Sasuke come to us, I move away but Hinata won't let go of me. I look down at our joined hands, this isn't right. I shouldn't be here. Not with Hinata.

But I heard a similar conversation between my parents before…

See! This is why I shouldn't get close to her because she makes me remember things I shouldn't she just makes me feel! And that's bad.

I turn to look over at Sasuke he silently watches us. I force Hinata to let go and I take a step back.

She is Sasuke's, not mine. I have nothing to do with her; I sense her eyes on me at first I make sure not to look down at her.

I should not have come in, I should have run for it when I had the chance…but there was…I saw when Hinata reacted to what her father was saying it was like she realized something. Almost as if it all clicked in her head…

I stood in the open door fascinated, I remember think I wish I had a camera to capture her but then the terror she felt set in. It was so quickly, her change that if I took my eyes off of her I would've missed it.

Hinata suddenly looked like she…like the world she thought she knew wasn't real. That everything she lived for didn't exist…like the world she knew was crumbling around her…

I've lived though that feeling and I didn't want to watch the moment she lost it…that she lost what she was holding onto so tightly, I couldn't stand it so that feeling again of wanting to protect her led my first step toward her and I leant out my hand to her. So this way Hinata can find her way back to this world…

I turn my head to look down at her, she stares at me her eyes wide and innocent, I notice the black bags under her eyes.

"I meant to say that you aren't alone because you have Sasuke," the words are forced. She blinks looking into my eyes, Hinata is just…it feels like she can look into me…my gaze wanders from her to Sasuke who silently watches, his eyes catch everything. To avoid being discovered by him I look down at Hinata.

She nods at me and I become conscious that I understand what that nod means.

_I know that stupid, Sasuke is here and he'll never leave me, he won't run away. I trust him not you Naruto…_

What…I take another step away.

I've never heard her voice. So why do I feel I just heard it? I was watching her, Hinata's lips didn't move but I feel as if. Did her…could it be that her voice reached me? Did I just…I turn and look at Sasuke. His expression hasn't changed so I couldn't have heard her but why does it seem that I did?

"Hinata you should go home with your dad, take the rest of the day I'll excuse you from the rest of your classes," Sarutobi Senior says.

She looks over at him; she doesn't move and just looks at the principal unsure.

"Hurry up!" I hear her father shout, I flinch at his angry voice. Hinata just stands and takes a step forward and slowly makes her way to her dad. She doesn't rush, Hinata keeps her sloth like walk until she reaches her father's side. He grabs her arm and pulls her.

My hands clench into fists at my sides. I glance at Sasuke to find him calm and collected.

"Don't say anything," he warns the older man. Mr. Hyuga outwardly doesn't react but…no I won't speculate.

Hinata turns to look back at us and smiles, this one isn't like yesterday but…it's forced, she's putting up a façade for us.

Sasuke stiffens and he grows angry after she gives us her back and his pulled away by her father.

"I hate it when she pretends for my sake. Like she has to protect me," Sasuke whispers to me. "Doesn't she get that I'm the one who does the protecting?" I don't answer, he isn't looking for one. Sasuke just needs someone to listen to him.


	6. Forget

**SoujouInLove**: I was just about to update but then I saw that you reviewed and felt that I had to add you!!! Yay, a new reviewer, welcome!!! Thanks!!!!

I'm happy you find it good!!!

I just updated right now cuz of you!!! Thank you!!!!!

**imatwilightfan**: Was it really that long? Oh, what I said is "Afternoon, how are you?" or it could be translated as: "Good afternoon, how do you do?" at least I think that's what it was, I should really study my Japanese but I'm too lazy! Thanks, I'm glad!!! Because sometimes after I reply to my reader's review they don't review anymore, so I must wonder if I'm a bother to them because they find that I'm annoying or that I shouldn't reply to them on here.

Yup, he was, well you'll find out sooner or later! Well it wasn't a completed rape, he didn't get to finish, it's not that it's sensitive it's just that readers find it offensive, I don't even want to go into detail about it but in one of my other stories I did a scene like that and a reader got really upset and started complaining all the time, so yup! But…ah, never mind!! I know I always make Hiashi come out as an asshole, I don't get why…he is, Naruto is becoming really interested in her…Sasuke is protective of her, I'm thinking of having a Sasuke pov but I'm still wondering about it…I always like your musings, you always make me feel like I'm a good writer!!! I'm all like wow, did I really do that? I'm a dork, yes I know. Ah, Sasuke warned Hinata about Naruto because Naruto is a jerk who doesn't care about anyone but himself, he always cares about himself then about anyone else, and Naruto has a tendency to use people to his advantage so Sasuke doesn't want them to get close…but then again it might be because he was a bit jealous of their closeness…

**CheezingIt54**: I'm glad you like me updating!

Oh, I'm sorry!

Thanks!!! I was totally nervous thinking you didn't like it because of the angst!

Oh…I'm not sure how to go on…well I'll tell you that I have a fear of clowns because sometimes during my summers I'd go to my grandma's house (I was forced to stay there during the summer by my dad) and she had these porcelain clown dolls and I'd swear that they'd be watching me at night and I couldn't go to sleep…I bet you didn't want to know this…sorry I tend to write more then I should…

Kitties totally are!

I would totally like to make it happen but I can't, I'm sorry!!! It's just that I feel she has to deal with everything before being able to talk again, she can't do that, I'm sorry!!! I really am!!!

Oh, okay!! I'll remember! It's okay I like huge rants!! I feel I get to know my readers better when they write more!!!

Thank you, hope I didn't make you wait too long, it really is, I feel sorry for the people who are allergic!

Thank you!!! I really love you!

**lovingo0Kawaii0oGirl**: I know!!! How have you been?! By the way I'm going to post your second story this week, I'm really sorry it took me so long!!! I'm sorry I hope you don't hate me!!!! Yes, I'm glad you discovered this story, I'm happy that you like it!!! Yes, it'll be a triangle of sorts…maybe a love square…ah, already you've made your alliance? Wow…I feel bad for the other characters…what about Neji and Hanabi? This will be the first time I actually incorporate Hanabi in a story where she's nice.

I'm so ecstatic that you're curious about the story!!! You'll find out about Itachi soon. Well it's because Sasuke was hurt that Naruto didn't remember him so he thought that to get back he should be mean to Naruto, Sasuke gets jealous and upset if people don't remember him…he's a kid like that…I'd hoped most of you guys couldn't really decide on which pairing you like more but I already know who it is but I like to play with you guys so it'll be a while before it's established!!! Shikamaru is angry towards Hinata because she rejected him but he's a nice guy and knows that their love was never meant to be. Not to worry I will continue just because you love it!!! Thank you and please forgive me for taking so long with your story, I'm going to make it the best it can be just for you!!!!!!

Much thanks, OrangeTulips out!!!

* * *

_**First, let me ask if you guys are actually getting e-mails alerting you about my stories if you have the alert thing, because I haven't been getting the e-mails about the reviews I'm receiving. **_

_**Second, I've updated most of my stories, so if you'd like to check out those new chapters and my two new one-shots!!!**_

_**Third, let me say that since I ended **__**Just a betrayal**__** this is my new favorite story, I prefer it over all my other ones…I guess I like it because it's dark…well so is **__**The way WE live**__** but this is different not so much drama…**_

_**Fourth, is that in chapter 8 or 9 we'll finally find out why Hinata is not talking, so please look forward to that!**_

_**And be sure to check out the chapter 1, 2, and 3 from **__**Just a Thought**__**, since they are newly revised chapters!**_

_**Thanks for everyone's continued support!!!!!**_

* * *

**Chapter 6: Forget**

"I planned for all three of us to eat lunch together," Sasuke admits as he starts to dig into the bento Hinata made him.

"Even if it meant sitting here?" I question him looking down at the bento she made for herself. Sasuke gave it to me saying that I should eat it.

"Yeah, I wanted to test you out to see if you really were popular. You would think eating while the whole school population watches would be difficult but it isn't. I've gotten accustomed to it. Everyone likes me you know," Sasuke confesses to me. I can't help but roll my eyes.

"You're so vain," I mutter.

"It's a quality chick's dig," he admits.

"Bullshit," I say. "I thought you were dating Hinata," the egg omelet he was eating shoots out of his mouth, he coughs loudly and I watch him growing amused by his reaction.

He glares at me accusingly as I smile.

"You did that on purpose!" he blames me. I grin as I look away and watch as a girl wipes off Sasuke's spit from her shin. She must be at least twenty feet away.

"You give me too much credit," I say, "that was pretty far though. I'm proud of you," I pat him on his back.

"Shut up you idiot!" he shouts.

"So since when have you two been friends?" I hear Kiba ask. I look up and find him standing in front of us.

"What's it to you?" Sasuke asks angrily he doesn't even bother to look at Kiba.

"Be nice," I order him; his right eyebrow goes up in question as he glances over at me. "I just found out that this asshole is the same kid that treated me like shit when I was tiny and handsome. I used to spend my summers with his family." I admit to him, it's better for me to tell the truth then have answer tons of more questions afterwards.

"How could you forget something like that?" Kiba asks clearly confused.

"All the drugs he takes fuck up his brain," stupid Sasuke mutters under his breath.

"I have an awful memory, I just finally remembered your guys name yesterday," I confess to Kiba.

"So what are you guys the best of friends now?" Kiba questions me.

"We've always been," I say shrugging my shoulder.

"Where's Hinata?" he asks suddenly, I look at Sasuke before I can answer Sasuke speaks up.

"What matters is that she'll be here tomorrow," I keep my gaze on him as he looks up at Kiba who is clearly not understanding anything.

Is he trying to convince himself? Does he have reason to believe otherwise?

As it turns out Sasuke was wrong.

Hinata didn't come to school the next day, she didn't come to school the week after, neither two weeks after…

* * *

It's been twenty-one days since I began to have lunch with Sasuke and occasionally hung out with him after school.

He acts as if everything's fine that he isn't worried but I can clearly see that he's on the edge, another day of her not coming and he'll grow crazy. I see it but Sasuke denies it.

Sasuke denies tons of stuff in particular the feelings he has towards Hinata. He's told me that he doesn't love Hinata but as the human lie detector I clearly see his lie.

Unless he believes that he doesn't love her. Which I find crazy; how could he not understand his own feelings?

But then again there could be something I'm missing…

"What are you thinking about?" I hear Sasuke ask me, "Wow, I can't believe I just asked you that."

"You offend me, I do have my moments in which I'm so deep in thought that I forget what I'm doing," I tell him as I bite into the rice ball I bought.

"I went to her house finally," Sasuke tell me after a pause. He's been going daily but as he put they never let him go farther than the entrance gate. Which are two or three gates inside the estate. "I wanted to see Hinata right, then they tell me that 'Hinata-san' which is really weird. At the Hyuga house they always called her 'Hinata-hime' or 'Hinata-dono.' Then I heard someone call Hinata's younger sister 'Hanabi-dono.' The household staff only calls the heiress like that. They then told me that Hinata hasn't been living there for the past two years. Why is it that she never told me?"

"How is she supposed to say anything?" I ask him, he turns to glare at me. "She has no voice," I clearly say it.

"She does! I've heard it," he whispers, I look away from him.

"If you don't love her why do you continue to stay with her?" I finally ask. That's been bugging me for the longest time. He doesn't say anything as he looks ahead, he looks serious and kind of out of it. I know that look; I've always hated it, because I didn't understand it. he has a faraway look, it's almost as if he can see everything and nothing at the same time but I get the feeling that he can see something that one else can… He sees more than normal people can and I hate it.

"Friends are supposed to stay with their friends through everything, isn't that the way it's supposed to be? We don't stay with them just through the good times but also the dark times," he says to me.

"I've only had one friend and I didn't even remember him. I've never gotten close to anyone so don't ask me," I say.

"Well I only have one more then you so I don't know either. But I think that's how it's supposed to be," Sasuke affirms me. "Hinata's dealt with a lot, more than a girl her age should deal with. She's learned to cope with everything in two ways. The first is she chose to erase certain memories and the second is in order not to talk about those memories she forced herself not to speak. I think over time Hinata has forgotten what her own voice sounds like." He says lying down on the grass.

I look up at the bright blue sky. Doesn't she know that no matter how awful those events were they still changed her. She could try as much as she wants to forget but those memories are still in her. It doesn't matter how deep she hid them they can still resurface in any moment.

Try to forget, it won't work believe me.

"Its weird how time still continues even when you think it'll stop I doesn't. It still goes on and on," I say out of nowhere. "Do you think we could force our self to stop time?"

Sasuke doesn't say anything at first he just looks away.

"No," he softly tells me, "time can't stop, it keeps going. Even if you stop, time will continue."

Does that mean Sasuke's time has stopped somewhere?

"It'll stop once you're dead," I hear Shikamaru say.

"Ah, the emo speaks," Sasuke says with an evil smile.

"I'm not emo that's your role, I'm the morbidly realistic depressed teen," Shikamaru responds.

"How is that even better?" I ask.

"Emo is a label but morbidly realistic depressed is a definition of sorts," Shikamaru tells me. "So still no sign of Hinata?" he asks.

It seems that Sasuke and Shikamaru have some sort of alliance that I don't understand. They both hate one another yet they can still talk to one another…their friendship of sorts is just weird like they are.

"None, I went to her house and they told me that Hinata doesn't live there anymore," Sasuke says sitting up.

"Don't you have her cell phone number?" Shikamaru asks Sasuke.

"She doesn't have one," I gasp as does Shikamaru.

"What?" we both yell out together shocked beyond belief. "How is that possible in this day and age?"

Sasuke looks a bit amused. "Don't know," he answers.

"Wait," Shikamaru says he walks away from us to go back to his table. He goes to TenTen, she ignores him but he keeps bothering her, she nods finally he asks her something again and she nods. He stays there then grabs her cell phone from her ear and runs to us. I turn to look at Sasuke and he shrugs his shoulder.

"Neji!" Shikamaru shouts as he throws the cell phone at Sasuke.

"Hey Neji, what's Hinata's address?" Sasuke asks as he puts the phone to his hear. I hear the bell ring and wave good-bye to him; he waves me off and continues to talk. So now he won't grow crazy with worry.

Now I'll be going back to my other table and Sasuke will get back to being with Hinata only. It's fine I knew this arrangement wasn't permanent.

I don't want to grow attached to someone; I don't need that in my life.

* * *

"He's been going everyday to the Hyuga compound," Hanabi says as she eats the food I made. I stare at her knowing she'll go on. "Shouldn't you have told Uchiha-san that you moved?"

She's being nice…Hanabi should say that I was kicked out and was "forced" to either live here or on the streets.

Which would you have picked?

I chose the obvious one…

I uncap the marker and write on the small white board that Hanabi bought me.

I put up the board and she reads it out loud.

'How am I supposed to tell him? In a letter or what?' she taps her chin with her index finger as she thinks about it.

"Yes, that would've been nice," she answers with a smile. I glare at her and wipe off the marker with my hand.

'I hate you,' she reads, Hanabi then looks at me and shakes her head.

"You don't mean that Onee-sama!" she says close to tears. I sigh then hear the door bell ring. I look at Hanabi and she stares back.

There are only two people who visit me, one is Hanabi and the other is my cousin Neji. He's away right now, plus Neji always calls me first to tell me he's coming over so it isn't him.

'It's probably some of the kids from the building pulling a prank. Just ignore it,' Hanabi nods but the door bell continues to ring and now the knocking has started.

"I don't know Onee-sama, maybe its Sasuke-san," Hanabi says. "I haven't been allowed to see him but he probably got your address from one of the servants," she admits pushing her chair back and she stands.

'It could be probably one of father's goons whose come to take you back!' I write and she smiles at me.

"I doubt it, he's busy right now with a merger of some sort," she tells me. She leaves me to walk to the door. I wait for her to come back and tell me I was right, that it was one of the kids playing around.

"Stupid!" I hear Sasuke's voice; I look up startled to see him in my dining room. His eyes show the feelings he's had all this time. I see how desperate and scared he's become. Is it because of me? "You should've told me you moved!" he shouts at me. Has he been worrying about me?

"He has," I look over at the foyer and see Naruto stand there unsure if he should come further in. "He's really been worried," I look down at the table. I don't like this! I don't want him here, I want Naruto out.

Sasuke I can deal with, I understand that he can see through me but not this stranger. I don't want Naruto to know me…I hate him, he shouldn't…

"Come in, I'm sorry but who are you?" my little sister asks the boy I hate.

"I'm Sasuke's friend, Uzumaki Naruto," he answers her nicely.

"My name is Hyuga Hanabi, please make yourself at home," I look up and glare at the back of Hanabi's head.

This isn't her place to invite strangers in! Doesn't she get that I don't like him? Can't she see that?

"I shouldn't, Hinata doesn't like me. I just came with Sasuke but I should leave now," he says. I smile and wave good-bye. He looks at me clearly amused at my reaction.

"No, you should stay, I insist. My sister made too much food and we can't possibly eat it all," I watch as she grabs his upper arm and pulls him in. I turn to look at Sasuke and find him watching me.

"How have you been?" he whispers to me. I write on my white board.

'Good and you?' I ask. He looks away from the board to stare at me. I want to smile at his concern but that would just make him angry. 'I promise I just wanted to make sure the gossip died down before I went back to school.'

"Gossip about what?" Hanabi asks me. She attends a very exclusive private school, the very same one that Sasuke and I are supposed to be attending.

'I was caught having sex in the girl's bathroom with Sasuke,' I write, Sasuke slaps me behind the head.

"Your sister is a loser, don't believe her, things when on, that's all," Sasuke is just too vague about things and why is he blushing like that? Now Hanabi is going to be wondering what went on.

'Don't worry Hanabi nothing happened, I just fought with a girl,' I write, yeah, she'll believe this because of the slight bruises still on my face and neck.

"Did you kick her ass?" she asks me sitting back down and growing visibly excited.

'I did, she had a purple face when I was done with her,' I lie with a superior smile. This is how it should be; my little sister should look up to me not down!

"What was the fight over?" she asks me innocently.

'Over stupid Sasuke,' I admit with a disgusted look on my face.

"Well! He's a bad influence on you," she says.

'I know but he told me that if I ever leave him he'll commit suicide because he can't live without me,' I lower my head waiting for him to slap my behind the head but as I look over at him wondering why it's taking him so long to hit me I find him frozen in fear.

His coloring looks a little grey and he steps away from me, I look at Hanabi and find a similar coloring on her. They both look freaked out and speechless. I turn to stare at Naruto and find him watching Sasuke intently.

'What's the matter?' I ask them on the board, 'I was just joking.'

"That isn't…it's not funny at all Onee-sama…" Hanabi says close to tears.

"Where's the bathroom?" Sasuke asks looking down at the floor; his too long hair covers his face from my prying eyes.

"Go down the hallway and it's the send door on the left," Hanabi whispers. Sasuke leaves towards the bathroom. "Are you trying to be mean Hinata?" my sister ask me as she wipes her tears, I'm confused what's going on? What did I do?

'No, I don't get it, what's going on?' I ask my sister as I lean forward to grab her hand, she shoves my hand away.

"Nothing don't worry about it," she says getting up and walks towards the kitchen. I sit here wondering what I did wrong.

"No one said anything," Naruto says after Hanabi leaves, I glare at him, I can care less about this. I did something that hurt both Sasuke and Hanabi so I don't care about anything else, but he ignores me as he keeps talking. "Not Shikamaru, Chouji, or Asuma-sensei none of us told anyone about what happened." He tells me as he sits down next to where Hanabi was sitting. My table sits six but I usually only use one chair.

'Why?' I write.

"Because it would be wrong to tell it…we aren't cruel like that," he says.

'So I've missed three weeks for no reason?' I ask him.

"Yeah, I actually have all the homework you've missed when Sasuke asked me to come with him I thought you would want to do your homework."

'You know me too well,' I hope he understand I'm being sarcastic but it seems he doesn't get it.

"Shikamaru was going to tag along but then he decided not to," Naruto tells me as he looks into my eyes.

'Why would he come?' I question finding it weird that he would care that much for me. Someone who doesn't talk to him anymore; we were never friends so why is he interested?

"Because he cares about you," Naruto says, I raise my eyebrows in question. "There are other people who worry about you that aren't Sasuke."

'Do you?' I ask him and I feel my cheeks burn red.

"No, I don't," he answers quickly, for some reason something in me feels sad.

'That's good because I don't either!' I write just as quickly to admit it like he did, he laughs.

"I could care less!" he admits loudly.

'Fine!' I look away from him and this heavy silence comes over us. I don't look at him; I keep my gaze out the window.

What is his problem?

"You should be happy that there are people who care about you. Be glad that you aren't alone in the world," he says after a long silence. I don't look at him and I don't respond to his words.

I rather be alone…I don't want anyone, I didn't ask for them. I only…there was only…

"So what have you been doing all this time?" Sasuke asks me coming back normal, like when he first came in. I let out a sigh and I happily smile up at him.

'Nothing,' I reply, 'I just stayed in this lonely apartment.'

"Is you dad paying for this place?" I nod. "Why didn't you tell me you moved?" he questions me.

'How did you want me to tell you?' I write.

"You could've written your address on a paper and given it to me, it's that easy," he says sitting on the opposite chair from Hanabi's vacant seat. "Where are your plates? I'm hungry for your food!" I glare at him and stand to go get plates for the two boys.

I find Hanabi in there crying, I stand in the doorway wondering why she's crying. I silently go to her and she turns to look up at me as she stays sitting down on the floor.

"Where are you?" she whispers to me in a eerie voice as her pale hand reaches out to touch my face, I stare back at her feeling chills go up my spine as her cold fingers touch me. "Where is my sister? Why did I lose you Hinata? Was it that traumatic? Was I that bad that you just stopped living?" she shouts at me in an accusing tone as she pulls her fingers away and stands up.

I stand here as I look over at her wondering what she's talking about.

"Why did he…why did he do this to you! I hate him! I hate him!" she yells as she grabs some glasses and throws them to the floor, she grabs anything and begins to throw it as she continues to sob.

I step back my eyes grow wide, I've never seen my calm and happy little sister like this, and I feel the tears form in my eyes. Could she…why is she acting like this? I grab my hair and shake my head, I don't understand I don't!

"Hanabi! Don't you dare!" I hear Sasuke say as he appears behind me, I let go of my hair and look at him, and his eyes soften as he looks into my crazy eyes. He always seems to calm me…he always brings me back from my silent insanity…always Sasuke.

"Maybe she'll come back if we tell her," she says, I take another step back. My sister has gone crazy; her eyes look wild and out of it. "I'm tired Sasuke, I'm so tired of this! It's like the fucken pink elephant in the room! She was to talk about it! She has to!" Hanabi cries out.

"Hinata go back, I'll return with the plates," Sasuke orders me as he walks past me and comforts Hanabi, why…I look at them and watch as Sasuke holds my small sister in his arms…it looks almost like they are lovers instead of strangers…I grab my shirt where my heart is and feel it hurt…why does…it hurts to see Sasuke hold my sister like that…he should only hold me…

I want to argue with him to get his attention but I don't. I do as I'm told and walk away. I know something is wrong with me, even I can see it now, and I do.

I didn't go to school because the things my dad said had me thinking back to the past.

I realized there were gaps in my memory…that there are events, people and things that happened which I couldn't remember. I freaked out, I tried to recall those memories but nothing…I failed…

I feel the front of my head pound against my skull. I see Naruto sitting there and I grab my white board and write.

'I'm going to lie down, will you be okay by yourself?' I question him without looking up.

"Yeah," he answers, I rub my forehead as I make my way to my bedroom. I close the door behind me and I slide down the door.

My head hurts; the pounding increases and I hug my bent up legs to me and rest my forehead on my knees.

I'm forcing myself to forget this…but why…

What is it? What could be so bad that I'd do this to myself?

Why does it feel that if I dig any deeper I'll break? That I'll lose myself?

That my quiet world will become chaotic and out of my control?

I have to make sure that I never remember those times…to protect my quiet world I'll keep myself from finding out the truth.

I hate to if I want to continue living, even if my existence is pathetic I rather be alive then dead…


	7. Lunch

**SoujouInLove**: No problem!!!!

I thank you!!!! I really hope you'll continue to find it good later on!!!!

Yes, they are the best period!!!!

Oh, it makes me so happy!!!! Much thanks!!! I need your cheers!!!!

I thank you!!! Take care!!!!

**XxL0V3islik3aR0S3xX**: Seriously you think so?! Much thanks!!! I like intense!!! I know right? Thanks again!!!! I really appreciate your comments!!!

**Always-there-with-tears**: Of course!! Don't worry there will be more to come!!! Ah shucks!!! Much thanks I'm really happy that you love it a ton!!! Thank you! Totally made my day that it's one of your favorite's thank you!!!!

**in your dreams as well**: Well I kind of establish it here but in the next chapter you'll know for sure! No it's not because she had a child, I never thought of that…that's not the reason she isn't speaking. It'll be clear soon so just be patient!

**CheezingIt54**: It wasn't her dad; it'll all be clear later.

Wow I'm sorry I didn't know that!! I'll try to hurry up so you won't die!!!

I'm glad thank you!!! Ah you're so kind to me!!! Thank you!!! Now for sure I feel motivated to hurry up for you!!!

They really are creepy…

Much thanks!!! I made you wait too long sorry about that!!! Thank you so much!!!! I appreciate your kindness!!! I really do!

**Hinata6**: Wow, thank you!!!! I'm really thankful, I'm glad you like Naruto some people don't like it because they like the clueless Naruto. I don't want to give anything away so I won't…I'll keep my mouth shut about your comment because I don't want to ruin it for you!!!! I know there'll be more NaruHina and SasuHina!! I want them in situations with one another!!! Seriously?! I thought you gave up on it for a minute because you didn't review but I'm so happy that I can make you happy!!! It makes me happy to make you happy!! Well anyone really!!! I always feel so much better when readers tell me that!!! Thank you!!! Don't worry I will!!! Thanks so much!!!

* * *

_**So I decided to do Hinata's writing as italic instead of just having the one parentheses, I hope it doesn't annoy too many of you guys.**_

_**So yup I had time this weekend to type!! I dropped two classes so now I can actually type and write my stories I just have to be motivated…**_

_**So please look forward to more updates.**_

_**I decided on chapter 9 as the time when I write what happened to Hinata for her to lose her voice. **_

* * *

**Chapter 7: Lunch**

I sit here and look out the huge windows of her living room, I shouldn't have allowed Sasuke to drag me along, and I should've just gone home.

"Where's Hinata?" Sasuke asks with plates in his arms, I point at the white board she wrote on. He looks up then down again and turns his eyes up towards the dark hall where the bathroom is in. "She'll be okay," I look up at him wondering what he's going on about.

"Will you?" I find myself asking. Sasuke suddenly looks at me. "Not that I care or anything but will you be?" I glance away from him and down at the table.

"So you can actually care about someone other than yourself," he murmurs, I feel my face turn red.

"Idiot! Don't be a fool! I only care about myself no one else but me!" I admit too loudly. Sasuke laughs at me; I feel my face become redder.

"What's going on?" I hear that girl's voice, I turn to stare at the kitchen door and find the small girl. She has to be in junior high but she looks thin and young. She looks like Hinata but she's different…

"Nothing, it's just that this dude is becoming shy," Sasuke says coughing.

"Oh?" I stare at her eyes and find them red and a bit swollen. "I've never heard of a guy being shy," she admits. "Where's onee-sama?" she asks as she looks around the room.

"She went to her room," Sasuke answers. I look at the two of them; they look pretty comfortable around one another. I've noticed that most girls are nervous around Sasuke and he usually ignores girls but he isn't ignoring her.

"Are the Hyuga's powerful?" I ask suddenly both of them turn to look at me. "It's just that Sasuke used to say that the Uchiha's are powerful and only other powerful families are allowed to associate themselves with the Uchiha's." Sasuke was pretty obnoxious back then, no if I think about it he still is…

"Wow you actually remembered something," Sasuke murmurs. I ignore his comment and look up at the girl.

"Well," she starts off, "you could say that the Hyuga's are above the Uchiha's on the food chain. But the Uchiha's are on top of the dying Namikaze's. The only man that was capable of doing something about his once powerful family is gone."

"Hanabi watch your tongue, you're in the presence of that man's only child," Sasuke speaks up as he eats.

"What but he has-" she stops to stare at me. "Your last name is Uzumaki correct?" she asks walking towards me.

"Yeah, father wanted me to take his women's last name, so I did. He thought it would be better for me," I say glancing over at her as she sits down in front of me.

"I'm sorry about-" I cut her off.

"Thanks," I say quickly with a forced smile.

"Wow…I don't know…how am I supposed to…" she mumbles to herself as she looks over at Sasuke. He watches her and shrugs his shoulders as he continues to eat.

"Don't worry about it," I say, she turns to stare at me, "I'm no one so don't address me like I' am. I should leave, I'll see you tomorrow," I say to Sasuke as I stand up from my chair.

"Yeah," he says as he waves at me. I turn back and watch as Hanabi leans into Sasuke's face and he smiles at her. I can't…what is going on with them? I walk to the door and let myself out. So yeah, I'm the freaking Namikaze heir. All I've inherited was a mountain of debts left to me thanks to the lady who gave birth to me.

My father was a responsible man, he was admired by everyone. He slowly began to make our family richer and strong but then he fell in love with the women who gave birth to me. She began to suck his life dry; it was because of her that my father killed himself. If she would've…

No, I don't care if that lady is still alive, and I have a feeling that she's still living in Konoha. She's the main reason I've been running away. I didn't…I hate her.

She is the one who made me like this, she is to blame.

I hate her; I hope she rots in hell soon. I don't care about her, not one bit, I don't…

* * *

I'm nervous, I walk slower than usual, I shouldn't have come today. In another day or week maybe, it'll be fine if I return then.

"Hinata!" I whirl around and only catch a glimpse of a smile before I'm crushed against my favorite sensei. "Oh my child! I've missed you!" Kurenai sensei cries out. I try to pull away from her bear hug but she's too strong.

"That's sexual harassment sensei," I hear a tired voice say. I'm suddenly let go of, and I gasp. I turn my head to look over at Shikamaru, and then I look down. "Don't," I hear him whisper. "I could never think less of you about anything, be proud." He proclaims to me as I watch his back as he slowly walks away from us.

What was that about? I just looked down because I felt something in my eye.

"Could it be he's in love with you?" Kurenai asks me. Without taking my eyes off his back I shake my head. He isn't, not anymore.

Maybe last year he still was, those feelings still lingered but not anymore. He's moved on, I can see it and I feel happy.

I turn around and see Shino walk with Gaara. I stare into Shino's sunglasses. I find myself smiling at him and wave hi at Shino. He stops to watch me.

I' am lucky to have people care about me even through everything. They kept their distance but still they kept close to me. I'm happy…

I can picture his smile under his pulled up color of his jacket. I feel Gaara's shocked gaze on my face.

"Well you seem to be in a good mood today!" Sensei happily says. I nod and look up at her, "I'm glad," she admits with a wide-happy smile.

We walk together to the class room. I keep my gaze down on the ground. I don't think anyone noticed my absence so it'll be fine.

"Come on," Kurenai-sensei encourages me as she squeezes my hand once. I take a deep breath then walk in with my head bent down. "Good morning," Kurenai says as she walks to her desk.

I slowly make my way to my desk. I look up at Sasuke to find him in his seat already. I tilt my head at him and a small smile comes onto his mouth.

"I beat you," he says proudly, I shrug one shoulder. It doesn't matter because tomorrow he'll be absent or late. "Did you do the bento for him?" he asks me. I nod as I glare at Naruto's back. "Are you sure you aren't mad that I'm going to ask him to eat with us?" he questions me as I sit down next to him.

I turn my scowl at Sasuke as I grab a pen and write on a piece of paper.

'_If I could I'd yell but I can't so all I can do is make you and him a nasty lunch for making this kind of decision without me!_' I write, he smirks and I slit my eyes at him.

"I still don't get why you hate him," he mumbles.

'_You are the one who warned me about him idiot! And now you want me to be friends with him?! Make up your mind stupid!_'

"So you are mad," he whispers looking down at his desk.

'_Not really, I can't be mad because that's a foreign feeling to me. I don't feel anything_.'

"Yes you do," he says looking into my eyes. I would like to argue with him further but then I feel sensei's eyes on me. I sit forward and keep my eyes on her.

She starts today lesson and I begin to feel lost they are way ahead from me. I guess this is what I get for missing three weeks of school and just staying in my pj's all day watching TV.

I have a feeling that the maid that comes to my apartment is getting paid more to give information on me to my dad. He probably thinks I secretly talk when no one is around. I don't know if it could be called hope on his part or distrust.

I don't know my father well enough to figure him out. I think that's bad, I mean to not even know one's father. For him to be a complete stranger even though we lived together for many years and his blood flows in me. I'd be depressed but I've gotten over it.

Before I know it the class is over and I stay seated for the next class. The sensei will probably get here in five or ten minutes.

"I'll be back," Sasuke tell me. I nod without looking up at him, I stare at my notes. I lean back as some papers float down before my eyes. I look up and see Gaara holding up some papers.

"Notes," that's his first word to me; he's never spoken to me before, never. I tilt my head to the side to look up at him. He meets my eyes. "Yes?" he questions me; I nod slowly and accept his papers. He leaves me before I could give him my thanks. I write him a note and throw it at the back of his head. He glowers back and I raise my hand to let him know that I was the one who hit him. He picks up the paper and reads it.

I start the long process of copying his notes. I squint trying to figure out his little letters. Our school is weird.

The principal decided that we alternate weekly, for example one week we have the normal Japanese way of the teachers coming to our class. Then we do it the American way where the students walk to class. The only class that we still have to walk to daily is biology; since we work on a new lab every day.

Just as I get into my work I feel someone beside me. I look up to find Sakura there. I glance at her then I go back to my work.

"The least you can say is 'Hello Sakura-sama,'" she whispers. I ignore her.

Does she hate me because as kids I picked on her or what?

"Leave her alone," I hear Gaara say. I stare over at him and he walks over to us. "Leave Hinata alone," he says it in a louder more forceful tone. My pen falls out of my fingers. He's standing up for me, he's never talked to me before seven minutes ago and he's standing up for me…

"You do know what happens when you go against me don't you?" she whispers in a shaky voice.

"I…don't…care…" he pauses after every word almost as if he's talking to an idiot. I smile and Sakura grows visibly pissed.

"If you do anything to my brother I will kick your ass Sakura," Temari says standing.

"I'll help since I think of myself as an equal opportunist," I hear Kankuro say.

"Family," Gaara says in a disgusted tone but I can see that he's happy that they are taking a stand against Sakura I lower my head.

"Don't," I stare up into those cerulean eyes that reflect so much. "Do not lower your head look up at Gaara's back, see it and keep your eyes on it. That's the back that's helping you."

"Are you standing against me too?!" Sakura yells as she whirls back to face Naruto.

"Sure why not?" Naruto asks with a happy smile. I don't look away from Gaara.

They shouldn't be doing this…

"It's about fucken time you idiots," I hear VP Jiraiya's voice. "Sakura Haruno I'd like a word with you," I turn to glance at him. He smiles and winks. "She's just jealous that your boobs are bigger," he says with a few hiccups, I smile. "Hinata, I'd like to talk to you later in-" he gets cut off.

"No you don't," Sasuke says from behind. "You will not touch her Jiraiya," Sasuke orders as he walks around Jiraiya.

I won't tell him that I've gone to him alone before and he hasn't tried anything on me. I usually go in to drink tea with him and he just tells me his exploits when he was younger. I know some of the stories he tells me are exaggerated but its fine because the story is better with a few embellishments. I have fun. I usually take notes because he wants me to write his biography.

"So what went on while I was away?" Sasuke asks and I ignore him and keep copying my notes.

I can't say thank you so how do I express it? What should I do?

"She'll make Shino and you a bento as thanks," I hear Sasuke announce, I stare over at him and see Naruto looking away. He told Sasuke what occurred.

'_What should I sell my bentos? Who the heck are you to make these kinds of important decisions? You jerk!_' I write quickly as he walks over to me.

"She just wrote that this is her way of saying thanks," Sasuke says with a laugh. I grab my pen and try to stab his hand but he moves it away and the metal tip of the pen flies off hitting the chair in front of me.

"Hinata it's good to have you back. How did you spend your vacation?" Asuma-sensei sarcastically asks me. I shrug my shoulders and put away my and Gaara's notes. I'll just ask Shiho sensei to let me borrow the copier. I'm too lazy to write them all…

Why couldn't Sasuke do this for me? I look over at him and find his head on his desk. His eyes are closed, he's sleeping. He knows the consequences of sleeping in this class. I raise my hand with a smile and point at Sasuke's sleeping form. Asuma sensei grins, everyone in his way ducks as he touches the Kleenex box. He throws it and it hits Sasuke's square in the face. I look forward and write pretending to pay attention to the lesson. I hold in my laugh, as I sense Sasuke's frown but I ignore it. He jumped up…and he smacked his forehead on the desk…

Sasuke thought he was safe from being hit by Asuma sensei by sitting all the way in the back. He was oh so wrong.

"Real mature Asuma," Sasuke says bending down to the side to toss the tissue box back. "Thanks rat," Sasuke mutters to me. He has an authoritative issue. He refuses to call our sensei's; sensei. I don't get why. Maybe because he wants to be an ass…no one says anything though…

Ah yes, Asuma sensei hates it when students sleep during his math class. He's got tired of having students sleep in his class so now he throws the tissue box at them to wake them up and keep them up. Shikamaru used to always sleep but being constantly bombarded with tissue boxes has left him wide awake at least in this class.

Okay, so if you sleep in class you'll be sure to be woken up by a tissue box in the face. He used to walk around and hit the sleepers with the box but now he just throws it. That's why when people see him grab the tissue box everyone ducks their head. He sometimes grabs it and never throws it; he just likes to see us all react.

He goes on and on about integers and equations. Stupid algebra, math is a nightmare to me. I always seem to fail and the only reason I'm passing the class is because Sasuke lets me copy off of his test and copy homework. I make sure not to copy all the answers correctly because then I'll be found out. I've been able to keep above a C so I'm happy.

Math hates me and I hate it. I have no use for it now or later in life.

* * *

I feel my eyelids start to close as I listen to Asuma sensei. How can anyone stay awake in the morning in Math? How is that scientifically possible?!

I force my eyes wide open and see Asuma sensei grab a hold of the tissue box.

"You're fast aren't you?" he asks me slightly impressed.

"Had to stay on my toes for the longest time," I answer. He doesn't respond and he just stares at me. Does he know my story?

How many of the people from this school know the truth? I should care but I don't. to me it doesn't matter how many people have heard, it's not like I'm hiding it or anything…but I'm not telling everyone about it either.

It's the past so whatever. It has nothing to do with my life now but it did shape who I' am…I think I should hate my dad but I can't I just pity him.

"Hinata and Naruto please come up to the board. I'm going to say an equation write it on the board then you have to solve it using the order of operations," Asuma sensei says. I stand and walk to the board and grab the orange marker. I feel Hinata next to me before I turn to see her. She grabs the red marker.

"Okay whoever gets it correct will receive ten extra credit points on the next test. So parentheses 72 to the third power divided by 27 plus 2,083 times 12 to the fourth power parentheses times 13 plus four take away 110,027 divided by 7/8 plus 273,117. Well go for it."

I look at the equation I wrote and compare it to the one Hinata wrote. Did I write it wrong or did Hinata?

"Both of you are idiots, neither of wrote the equation correct." I hear Sasuke's snobby voice.

I watch as Hinata's hand moves quickly.

'_Well why don't you come up here and show us the correct equation stupid!!!_'

"Wow Hinata I didn't imagine you liked math so much," I say sarcastically then she turns her head to the side to scowl at me.

"Because the two of you wrote it incorrectly I'm going to take away five points from your next exam. Go back to your seats you failures," sensei orders us.

"So mean, won't Kurenai sensei get mad Hinata?" I ask her, Hinata's eyes grow wide then a sad smile comes onto her lips and she nods slowly.

'_Who knows how Kurenai sensei reacts when I tell her today. Do you think she'll get mad at our math teacher?_'

"Yeah, she will. I mean you just got back from your vacation and to have this math sensei push you so hard the first day back is really cruel-" I get cut off by a red faced Asuma sensei.

"Ok, no minus points just go back to your seats before I regret my decision," I stick out my hand palm out to Hinata but she stands there staring at my hand.

I look into her eyes as she tilts her head to the side I reach for her hand and pull it forward her face grows a bit red and I feel my own grow hot.

"It's called a high five," I whisper to her, she looks up into my eyes; I look back into her lavender colored eyes. Why does she hide what she feels? Does she let anyone into her world?

Her eyes search mine. I hear someone clear his throat I look to the side and find Sasuke stand there we suddenly pull apart but then she crashes into me. I look down at her and find our fingers intertwined as we hold hands did I hold onto her hand? We both stare down at our joined hands Hinata's face becomes redder and a smile comes onto her lips. She suddenly lets go and walks away. I stare down at my hand and it still feels warm and it tingles, I bend my head down to look at the hand she was holding.

Wait! I look up and watch as Sasuke begins to solve the equation. I'm acting like a girl. Her hand was really soft like a pancake, that's how her hand felt to me.

"You're falling for her aren't you?" I look to my left and see Ino sitting there. She stares at me and I look away from her.

"I don't know what you mean," I reply as a triumphant Sasuke finishes the equation.

"I know that look you have on your face," she whispers as she leans towards me. I look over at her watching Shikamaru's back. "After all that's the look I have when I stare at Shikamaru." Why is she telling me this?

"I'm not…" I pause and she looks away from Shikamaru to stare at me. "Don't confuse me with yourself. I don't love her or anyone I only love myself." I admit out loud. Ino doesn't say anything further but I can see that she doesn't believe me I don't care if she believes me or not.

* * *

As soon as fourth period is over everyone stands and leaves I slowly gather my stuff as I glare at Sasuke's back.

"Naruto want to eat with us?" Sasuke shouts out before the class could leave. Naruto stands frozen by his desk. I feel my face grow warm as I glance at him. Naruto looks so cute just standing there…what did I just think?!

How could I even think that? What's wrong with me?! I'm acting like a girl!! How? It's so disgusting!

"Hinata hurry up or we're leaving you behind." I look up to stare at Sasuke then I hold up the bento's and Sasuke's jaw drops. "Sorry Hinata-hime! Would you like me to carry your bag?" Sasuke asks bowing. I nod once and he comes over to hold my back. I walk next to Sasuke on his left and Naruto walks on Sasuke's right side.

This is going to be weird, I just know it! I hope it is awkward and that way Sasuke won't ask him to come along again. Stupid Sasuke!

"Hey where are you going stupid?" I whirl back and find both boys sit down on a small patch of grass in front of the cafeteria. "This is our spot now," Sasuke says sitting down. My hand clenches to my side, I sit between both boys and I untie the knot on top of the three bento's. I toss the one on top at Sasuke, he catches it. I hand the second one to Naruto and keep the last one for myself. "Are you still mad?" Sasuke asks me with a sigh.

"About what?" the nosy Naruto asks.

"Hinata is a baby when it comes to doing new things, so right now she's acting like a baby," stupid Sasuke!

"Ah, she's one of those people," I slowly turn my head to glare at the blonde haired boy. "Sorry," he murmurs.

I open my bento and start to eat; none of us say anything at first.

"So are you two dating?" Naruto suddenly asks. I nod and look over at a purple faced Sasuke. He suddenly coughs loudly and the egg omelet he was eating shoots out of his mouth and hits a girl on her leg. That girl is a at least twenty feet away. I applaud Sasuke.

"Hey, isn't that the chick you hit last time?" Naruto asks.

"Stupid! Why the hell are you asking me again?" Sasuke shouts red faced. "It was on purpose wasn't it?" he accuses Naruto; I turn to stare at Naruto waiting for him to say something back.

"Well I got my answer this time. The last time I asked you didn't answer so I had to ask again. It's my curious side that has to know," Naruto is just rambling, he isn't curious, he's totally nosy. I eat and turn towards Sasuke and wait for his come back

"What? I didn't answer you," Sasuke says, I whirl to Naruto.

"No, but Hinata did," Naruto rats on me. I keep my angry eyes on Naruto.

"What? How?" Sasuke asks.

"By nodding," next thing I know I'm slapped behind my head.

"Stupid why would you say yes when we aren't!" Sasuke yells at me.

"You just broke her heart," Naruto uses a fake caring tone. I glare at him over my shoulder then shyly look up at Sasuke and make a heart over my heart and point at him. I see his pale face become red and he slaps me behind the head again.

"Idiot! Don't lie!" he shouts at me loudly. I hide my grin and slowly nod, pretending to understand my lesson.

"So you aren't together?" the nosy Naruto asks. Before I can respond I hear Sasuke speak up.

"No, we aren't," Sasuke says. He's no fun! "Why are you interested in Hinata?" Sasuke teasingly asks.

"No!" Naruto admits quickly. "I can't love." I turn my head to look at Naruto, he must be joking. But his expression shows that he really thinks this. I grab my backpack and take out the legal pad I use to take notes.

I start to write then I show it to Naruto. I watch as his eyes move as he reads it.

"What did she write?" Sasuke asks.

"Some worthless shit," Naruto says. I poke him between his shoulder blades. "Ow! What the fuck!" he shouts. I glare at him and I write something new.

"Read it out loud, Hinata is being a meanie and is ignoring me," of course Sasuke would say that.

"'_You can't stop love from happening, it just does. You can fight but it won't make a difference. Love is like a punch in the face it hurts and you'll always remember the feeling afterwards. It's there even if you don't want to believe it_."' Naruto reads in a annoying voice. I should become a poet! I'm good with words!!!

"Yeah, that's bullshit, it makes no sense," Sasuke says, I stab Naruto with my finger on his back.

"What the hell is your problem!!!" he shouts, I feel a lot of people turn to look at us.

'_Sasuke's too far from me so I couldn't do anything to him_,' I write.

"Liar! He's a few inches from you!" his voice is really high.

"Stop being a baby Naruto," Sasuke says.

"Yeah well you say that because she isn't stabbing you!" he shouts at Sasuke. Naruto is really sensitive…

"She does, always. I have bruises do you want to see?" Sasuke asks.

"Stupid, you just want to take off your shirt in front of all the girls," I hear Naruto mutter. I smile and nod. I duck my head and Sasuke's hand flies over my head. "Good reflexes Hinata," Naruto says surprised. I feel a silly smile come onto my lips.

"Don't encourage her idiot!" Sasuke shouts upset.

'_If you slap me behind the head again I'll make you sweet lunches only! Sweet rice, mochi, sweet been paste buns, and dango!!!_' I write quickly and put the paper in his face.

I hear a loud gasp come from Sasuke.

"You have caused her to rebel against me!" Sasuke accuses Naruto after a long pause.

"What? I've told you before haven't I? I'm a bad influence on everyone who comes in contact with me." Naruto responds as he lies back on the grass. I look over at him and silently disagree with him as I hear Sasuke mutter how sad he feels….Naruto can change people in a way that no one can…after all in his own way he's made me different in my own quiet way…


	8. First

**CheezingIt54**: Nope, you're in a stalker free zone!!!!

Don't worry he opens up here!!!! But he still has to love himself!

Yup! If a certain blue haired girl can change his way of thinking then yup, he'll forgive her if she ever comes looking for him. Although it would be difficult for him. They made it into a movie a year ago or so right? Wait let me google it! In 2007! It might seem fun if I do that…

I'm really content you loved it!!! I'll try to keep up the awesomeness!!!

I will just for you!!!! Thanks for your encouragement I need it!!!

**imatwilightfan**: That's always good! I know, at first I planned it a bit too quickly because I wanted to get to the good stuff with the couple, but I decided to pull back a bit. Thanks, I'm glad!!! Oh, it's not like a real hard slap behind the head, it's a small tap. I forgot what anime I watched where the guy would do that to the girl, I don't think its mean; I personally think it's cute and believe it to be that he's comfortable enough with her to do that. Kind of like a sister or brother hitting you. He does, I'll show it later. The last one I received was your personal review of the second story I wrote for you. Did you send me more PM's? Thanks I need all the power I can get!!!

I remember the "_Notting Hill_" one!!! I love that movie and Hugh Grant! Have you seen "_Two Weeks Notice_" with Sandra Bullock? It's on top list of favorite romantic movies ever!!! Both are wonderful lines!!! Does it matter in which story I use them for? Although the _Notting Hill_ one seems right for a confession from Hinata to one of the guys…

Thanks again for being so cool and encouraging especially because you ask lots of questions!!! I'm totally into my stories and I love discussing them with you!!! Thank you!!!!!

* * *

_**As many of you can tell in this chapter I finally reveal the pairing, don't worry though I'll provide more triangle or square love interests…**_

_**I'm working on the next chapter so that I can make you proud!!!**_

_**So look forward to it!!!!!!!!!!**_

* * *

**Chapter 8: First**

"You look happy," I turn to stare at Sasuke, it's Friday and I've gotten used to being around Naruto. I've found myself being…dare I say it…normal…which is totally a new experience for me. Sasuke looks away from me. I watch him wondering what he means. "You used to smile just with me," he whispers to me in a hollow voice. He suddenly turns red and whirls his head to me, my eyes grow big. "Not that it's important to me or anything!" he shouts quite loudly. "Don't look at me with those eyes!" he demands of me.

I quickly look away. When he says that I know it means he doesn't want me looking into him.

"I'll be-" he doesn't finish and he walks away. I look up to stare at his back. I feel my heart clench and my stomach clusters with knots.

Why does it feel as if Sasuke is slipping through my fingers? I've noticed little things that have changed in him since Naruto got here. Not that I think Naruto is to blame but it feels like Sasuke's finally leaving my silent world…

And it terrifies me…

I walk out of the bathroom shaking my wet hands, I hate using paper towels. I stand outside the open doors of the Main building only to find Sasuke standing by the auditorium doors. From what I've come to understand no one is supposed to be there during lunch, since it's an underground passage.

He suddenly turns to stare at me. "I need to tell you something." He says why would he talk to me away from Hinata? Unless he doesn't want her to know…

I walk to him and he stares at me.

"I've been trying to decide whether or not I should mention it to you," he says not looking at me at all but instead he stares down. "You haven't asked about him yet and I want to keep it that way…" he stops to finally look up at me. I stare back growing confused by his actions and words.

"Who?" I ask.

"Itachi," I watch him waiting for him to continue and he doesn't, I have to keep pressing him for details. It's that nosy side of me…

"To who?" I find myself whispering.

"Hinata, whatever you do never mention his name in front of her." I keep my eyes on him hoping he'll give me further details but his mouth looks firmly shut.

"Why shouldn't I mention Itachi to Hinata?" he just watches me with an expression that makes me feel mentally ill. "I need a reason why," I say a bit angrily, I mean come on how else am I supposed to react? I'm not mentally ill and he doesn't have to look at me like I' am!!

Plus, I become upset when someone tells me not to do something; it makes me want to do it even more. I'm normal like that.

"Just trust me," he responds walking away.

"I need a reason Sasuke," I announce to his retreating back.

"Its private family problems," he says without missing a beat.

"Bullshit, just tell me. I won't tell anyone," I respond.

"I can't," he says growling angry and it's visible on his face as he looks back at me.

"Why?" I shout.

"Because it's not my secret to tell!" he shouts back.

"Fine, I'll go ask her," I say pushing him aside with my shoulder.

"Stop it! Don't you get it? I don't want you to mention him because he's the reason she's shut herself in!" he admits as he grabs my shoulder to turn me around to face him.

"What?" I ask and I look into his eyes, his expression, his eyes, his mouth…it's all twisted in agony and guilt. It's weird to see Sasuke actually express his emotions on his face, he never did. It's not who he is.

"It was all Itachi's fault…all his…God it hurts," Sasuke whispers closing his eyes. "Fuck, I think I'm going to cry." No man wants other people to see him cry so I reach for the door handle to the auditorium and grab Sasuke to shove him inside. "This is why I didn't want to tell you," he admits.

"I'll be back," I say as I leave through the door that I came in from. I walk normal like towards a lonely Hinata who keeps her head bend down. I feel something in my throat as I stare at her. I try to clear it away but this thing is persistent.

"Hey dork, what are you doing?" I ask her and she slowly looks up at me, those eyes of hers haunt me. They're just so empty that it's difficult to believe she's actually alive I watch her mouth as she moves her lips. I hide my surprise.

She just mouthed, "_nothing, where's Sasuke?_" my heart rate is rising to a thousand beats a second.

Last time she did this I couldn't understand her. Plus she got embarrassed.

"He's ditching and I'm going with him," I say clearing my throat.

"_Don't go!_" she mouths with tears gathering in her eyes. "_I'll be lonely without you!_" I look down at Hinata I don't know what to do. My heart tells me to stay but I've never listed to it. If I stay I run the risk…the thing is I have a feeling that I'll…

I won't even think such an evil thought!

"I'll go tell him that I can't leave with him, just wait for me here," I say quickly and with a red face, I grab Sasuke's stuff and runaway in humiliation.

I feel this huge red cloud of shame hovering over me, I just…

"Why'd you runaway?" Sasuke asks me with red eyes. "Are you scared or some shit?" he questions me in a angry voice.

"No, I went to get your stuff because I would imagine that you don't want to stay here so I left to get your bag," I say holding it up.

"Oh? But I have nowhere to go, I don't want to go home," he admits.

"Take out your cell phone," he stares at me and he does as I say. I search for his GPS and write my address. "There go hang out in my apartment," I tell him. "I'm on the third floor apartment 3G," I say to him and hand over my keys.

"Are you certain?" he asks unsure as he looks at my keys.

"Yeah, its fine I don't mind."

"T-thanks," he says with his face down.

"Sure, after all you're my only friend," I say with a shrug of my shoulders. "I'll see you tomorrow."

"I'll probably be there still when you get home," he admits.

"Okay, I'll see you later then," I tell him with a wave.

I walk away awkwardly, I'm left with doubt and questions Sasuke will answer when I get home.

"I won't mention him to Hinata, I promise," I say before leaving.

"Thank you," Sasuke shouts at my back before I go away I'll mention to him that Hinata was trying to talk to me but no voice came out. Wait…should I?

As I make my way to her I find Hinata just sitting there she reminds me of a dog waiting for its owner.

She looks up at me and smiles, I stop to watch her. I feel like I can't breathe…her smile has left me breathless and I feel stupid about it. I walk to her with a bright red face.

I sit next to her and she pats my shoulder I look at the paper and read it out loud.

"_Did I reach you? Were you able to hear my voice?"_ I gaze at her.

"You reached me but I wasn't able to hear you voice, I'm sorry," I whisper. She looks away from me. She writes on a paper and shows it to me.

"_I'm glad_," I pause from reading it, I look over at her eyes as I read the last part, "_that I reached you…_" I sit here surprised.

Does she understand the implication? It's like…I don't understand Hinata. She's just so different from anyone I've dealt with. I don't know how to react to her. I wasn't even lying; this girl has actually reached me. I've tried to stop it from happening but to no avail, Hinata has made me different. I actually care for her and I…want to protect her. A poke on my arm makes me jump in surprise. I look up and see everyone walking I look to my right and find Hinata sitting there with half a smile on her mouth.

"The bell rang?" I ask her, she nods with that magical half smile on her lips, she looks…for once I see life shine in her eyes and I wonder if it's because of me…

She gets up and bends forward to gather her belongings.

Holy shit…it just hit me. I've actually admitted to myself that I'm in love with Hinata. I can actually feel this for someone who isn't me…

This can't be happening…I just can't…my head rises and I stare at Hinata. All these new emotions calm down inside me as I stare at her. Just a second ago my emotions were jumbled up, but as I stare into her honest eyes I grow calm.

Is this love? Does love change people? But first what the hell is love? Is it like Hinata mentioned? Is it like a punch to the face? Will I always remember this feeling?

Why is she smiling so happily? Why is it that her smile makes me feel that everything will turn out okay?

"What the hell are you two doing?" I look over at Shikamaru. "The bell rang you guys are going to be late." He says before walking away. I clear my throat and look at Hinata.

"Come on," I say walking ahead of her. My heart beat quickens as she walks beside me. I'll be okay. Everything will turn out fine. At least that's what I'm hoping.

* * *

I push the cart of books to the back of the library. I see some students walk around the library searching for a book. I ignore them and stand before a bookcase and start searching for the books "home."

"Hey, Hinata," the mention of my name makes me look over at the person who called me I gaze back and find that smiling face of Naruto's, he's acting as if I haven't seen him all day. What a weirdo… "I have a temper problem," he suddenly tells me, "I've always had it, and if I talk to someone I want them to acknowledge me you know. I don't want to be forgotten, I want everyone to remember me…" I stop and keep my back to him. What is he going on about?

But he's the opposite of me, he wants to be known but I want to blend in…he wants to stand out and have the spotlight where I want to hide and avoid anyone…this guy.

I whirl around and I find him watching the floor.

"I'm…a coward who needs to be reminded that I exist I need people to hear me and listen to me or else I'll feel I'll stop existing you know?" he asks me in a whisper, he then looks up and I meet his eyes. They show how vulnerable he's feeling at the moment, those eyes are squeezing my heart. "It's stupid right?" I shake my head quickly.

How could he tell me this, a stranger who doesn't even know him at all?

"I'm telling you this because I feel like you'll listen you know," he tells me taking a step closer to me. "You aren't the kind of girl who would pretend to listen while you're actually thinking about something completely different, I hate those girls." He keeps telling me things that he shouldn't.

Isn't he afraid that I'll tell someone? I mean Sasuke tells me things because he knows I don't talk so he doesn't run the risk of everyone finding out about his secrets. Plus the things he tells me aren't earth shattering or anything like that. But this guy…

"That is why I talk loud and act like an idiot, I do these things to hold on to the attention, I live for it you know?" he tells me still looking into my eyes. "There are times when I can tell people are lying, it's like my sixth sense but there's something about you that I can't really put my finger on it…it's like you are the one person where I have to guess whether you are lying or telling the truth."

What does he gain from talking to me, I frown a bit. How can he tell when people are lying? Is that a gift or something?

"Can I ask you something?" he questions me softly, I nod. "Do you not talk at all?" he asks me in a funny tone, I half smile and nod. "Wow…" he murmurs I stare at him more deeply, why is he blushing like that? "You look cute when you smile," he mutters. I give him my back and lower my head. He's teasing me again. "It's the truth! I don't lie! Look I don't filter the things I say if I did it would be no fun, so I say what I want to say whenever I want to say it! That's just who I am."

Something about Naruto has me thinking, he has me wondering more about him. I'm never that curious.

Like the other day I read this new manga and I've become obsessed with it! I mean I go online and search all about it but then while I search I find a new manga and become interested in that one instead. It's an unending cycle that keeps going and going.

So for me to find him interesting enough that I want to ask more questions and to just listen to him more, it has me a bit scared.

"Ha, it feels weird to talk to you," he admits, I nod I get that a lot. "It makes me feel happy that there's someone I can come to just to talk. You make me feel at ease. I always felt this unused energy bubbling in me like I always have to keep moving but being with you has me feeling calm and happy!"

He is really weird, how can this make him happy? I sigh and give him my back once more and walk further into the back part of the library, I have to find another book's home.

I can sense his eyes on my back as I keep searching; it's almost as if he can't stop from staring at me. I look down feeling embarrassed.

"You do that a lot don't you?" he whispers, I look back forgetting my impossibly red face to meet his eyes that reflect his amusement towards me but also his observant nature. "You for some reason always keep your head down why?" I look down, shrug my shoulder, and walk away. "It's weird, it's kind of like I can or am starting to understand you more now. I get you in a way that I don't get people whom I always talk to," he comments.

I sigh, can't he leave me alone? I mean I understand that he can feel comfortable around me because I don't stare at him in a ogling way that most girls do but I do like my space and alone time.

Can't he go bug someone else? But then again a part of me feels comfortable around him I feel I can be myself around him. Something about Naruto has me feeling secure…And this feeling is growing and is becoming dangerous for me.

"I'm starting to understand you," he says as I walk away only to walk into a square table, I hear him chuckle, I'm glad I can make him laugh. I walk away and this time look around to make sure nothing gets in my way. "It's kind of cute. You know that whole act of you becoming a klutz around me." There's that word again…why does "cute" get me all flustered?

Sasuke always says that there's something in me that brings out his desire to protect me. I think that's why he sticks around this school. I think it's me that keeps him here…

I don't want to be a burden to him though. I'm glad that he keeps me company but I don't want to tie him down, he deserves more…

I look over at Naruto as he sits next to me at the table. Why is he telling me all this? Am I his priest too? Is he confessing to me?

"You must be wondering why I'm telling you everything," he whispers. Those stunning cerulean eyes meet my plain eyes, I feel like I can't breathe. There are so many different kinds of emotions that are passing in his eyes. So many… "I feel that you should get to know me better."

_Why_? I find myself writing.

"Don't know just because I guess," he answers with half a smile. That half smile is hiding something. I'm not sure how I know but I do. I find myself smiling and leaning against his shoulder and move him.

_Come on tell me!_ I write on the paper.

"Nope!" he responds with a wider smile.

_I hate you, just thought you should know that!_

"You come off kind of snobbish in your writing, I liked you better when I had to guess and not really know what you were thinking," he mutters in a joking manner but I don't get it. "Look I'm a sarcastic bastard," he admits to me, I stare at him waiting.

_And…_

"Nothing just thought you should know people tend to tell me that the things I say can be harsh."

_Just because I look weak doesn't mean I' am, I'm stronger then I'm given credit. I don't react I'm provoked, I'm used to it you know. I've gotten accustomed to people talking about me in front of me and behind my back. People sometimes forget that I exist so they talk about me as if I'm not in front of them but to me it makes no difference. _

He stares at me and that expression on his handsome face reflects the sadness he feels towards me. I shake my head not wanting his pity.

_Wow did I just leave you speechless?_ The grin on his face makes my own form.

"Yeah kind of; I didn't know people still thought that way…but I had a feeling you were that strong."

_Don't think I forgot about earlier!! Tell me please!_ I write in big words.

"Oh, you didn't?" He asks me in a different voice, I feel my eyes grow bigger as I lean back a bit; his smile grows a bit wider at my reaction. He's using his "sweet" voice which I imagine he uses to pick up women; I'm put off by it though. Although I do feel a slight blush appear on my cheeks, He leans forward ready to continue but then I fall back but he grabs my arm. Naruto laughs as I turn my deadly glower at him, the bastard only grins.

I suddenly push him away and sit straight and look ahead. Was I just…could this be what is called…flirt…flirting? I feel like I'm choking on my words…

Disgusting! I stand up quickly and walk away; I lower my face in shame. I have…I can't believe I just flirted!

It isn't who I' am! I don't flirt!! I don't!!

On top of flirting I ran away from him! I ran!!

I'm so disgusting! I walk into the girl's bathroom and go into the first empty stall. I breathe hard while I stand in here.

I lean back against one of the stall walls, I just realize that I'll be alone if Sasuke leaves me…all alone…and that I love someone else…also I've just become conscious that Naruto and I can't be together.

Even if I were in love with Naruto, I can't be with him, I can't. This revelation of mine has me suddenly sad. I mean heartbreaking sad, the kind that leaves this pain in my heart that won't leave.

I feel this need to cry and to keep crying until tears of blood come out.

Why am I feeling this? What is this foreign emotion?

I can't…I couldn't…I feel something warm slide down my cheeks I reach up and touch the bottom of my eyes why am I crying?

Seriously? Am I this sad because I can't be with him?

I can't stop crying.

"Hinata?" I look to the side and just see the stall wall. "Are you in here? I was on my way to the attendance office when I saw you walk in here." I open the door and see Kurenai sensei. She looks at my face and quickly comes over to me. "What's wrong honey?" she questions me suddenly becoming worried I just hug her as I cry on her. I feel sadder now. I cry harder and my body trembles.

I can't be with him! I can't be happy with Naruto.

"Are you hurt somewhere? Did someone do something?" Sensei asks in a mixture of fear and anger. I nod against her chest. "Where does it hurt?" she asks back in worry mode.

I pull away from her and tap my heart.

"What?" she asks growing confused. I hug her once more hiding in her warmth. I close my eyes trying to push the tears back but then suddenly I begin to wonder if this is what a mother's embrace feels like.

"Come on let's go to my classroom," she says pulling away from me and coming to my side to rest her arm on my shoulder. She guides me towards her classroom.

This pain in my chest won't go away, I know it won't. Just thinking this makes the tears fall faster.

I'm in love with Naruto and I couldn't feel worse. Love isn't as happy as they make out to be in those shojo manga's!

* * *

I'm not worried; I don't care where she's at! It doesn't matter to me! Nope, not at all! She left me! After she was flirting with me and she left without getting that ugly ass bathroom pass! How is that even fair? I mean I'm always obligated to use it whenever I go to the bathroom. If I don't Shiho sensei says that she'll give me detention!!! She hates me!

"No it's fine sensei, I'll keep her belongings here." I look over at the librarian, as soon as she hangs up I run to her desk.

"Where did Hinata go?" I ask.

"With Kurenai sensei," she answers me pushing her glasses up.

"Is she okay? Did something happen? Did someone do something to Hinata? Answer me sensei!" I shout.

"We are in a library so lower your voice!" she shouts back. "Hinata is just fine, sensei just wanted to talk to Hinata and so she took her."

I find myself sighing with relief, I'm glad she's safe.

"Could you take care of the people at the counter?" Shioh sensei asks me. I nod and walk over to the counter.

The line grows longer and I find myself preoccupied with this instead of thinking about my sudden awareness of love.

* * *

_What is love?_ I write on the board, I look back at Sensei as she sits on a student's desk with a mug of coffee in her hand.

"It's an irrational emotion, that's useless but oh so wonderful," sensei says with a sigh.

_How do you know when you're in love?_

"It's different for each person. But from my experience you know you're in love with a man when your palms grow sweaty," yeah, that's happened to me… "You're heart races when he's near you," yup, "you always picture his smiling face in your mind," check. "You suddenly find yourself dreaming of your wedding," no that hasn't happened. "Most of all you just know," she says looking into my eyes.

I know…I know…

"Why were you crying?" Kurenai sensei whispers.

_Because I realized that I'm in love…_

"See that could be a sign too!" she tells me happily.

I shake my head. _I can't be with him_, I confess_. I'm too damaged to make him happy. Above everything I want him to be happy, that's what I really want for him._

"Love means being selfish," Kurenai says as she walks to me to stand beside me. "Who gives a shit if you're damaged? Be selfish Hinata, take that love, you're a girl who should take a chance, you might become happy. And you might even be able to find what you've been searching for."

My voice…if I become selfish and hold onto my love with both hands I might be able to find my voice? Is it possible?

"Did you realize something?" her voice brings me back to reality.

_I want to be selfish_, I admit on the board. She smiles at me approvingly.

"Go for it and don't regret your decision. Whatever happens be sure to be proud of your choice. If you can't then that means the love you felt wasn't real. Take the leap and be brave." A new found respect towards Kurenai sensei has begun to grow.

_Thank you!_ I write, she smiles fondly at me.

"My door is always open for you Hinata," I go to her and hug her tightly. "Go on, here's a pass you're twenty minutes late to your next period."

She's cleared any doubts I may have had. I will take the leap and hopefully someone will be there to catch me.


	9. Itachi

**SoujouInLove**: Truly? You aren't lying to me? I know how you feel though, when I write something and it feel that I did something good, I feel super hyper too! It makes me feel better to know that someone gets hyper from my stories! Thanks! We're like sisters, I'm a total lazy ass and I hate doing things too! I so agree with you! It's just too much work to do things and there's nothing to gain. There's no need for me to forgive you! You gave your review so that's all that matters to me! Thanks so much! I think I may use the first few lines of the poem for the story, I'm still not sure if I want Naruto or Hinata to say it…I'll have to discuss it with myself further. It's a very beautiful poem! I have never been good with poems; give my thanks to your friend! If you don't mind me asking can I have a name she'd like to go by to give her credit and of course I'll give you the finder's credit. If you want you can put in the review or in a PM. What ever floats your boat! Thanks so much again! I really need your cheering even in your sleep! Thanks!

**Hinata6**: You don't think it was too soon? I'm kind of wondering about my pace…although I'm seriously happy that you liked it! You'll find out in this chapter, finally right? Nope not rape, I wonder if what I came up with was on your radar or if I surprised you, you must tell me! I'm so sorry I made you wait so long! So sorry!

I really did update whenever I wanted…once again sorry for the wait. Thanks so much, I really need to read that, I need the love! Thanks!

**CheezingIt54**: I'm glad it was fast; at least I hope it makes up for the update for taking so long…sorry about that! I know me too! Don't worry you'll find out what Itachi did in this chapter, I won't leave you in suspense too long, I get right to it! I should really read the book it sounds pretty interesting.

I so was! I shout that out when there is a moment between Hinata and Naruto in other stories, my mother says I'm crazy but in truth I'm just so happy!

I love the pairing! Although I'm starting to love Hinata and Itachi…even though they never meet in the manga…I still love them!

No you are filled of awesomeness!

Thanks, I'll try to keep up the work and I wish you peace too!

* * *

_**It took me forever, but I'm thinking of changing the end, it doesn't really feel right to me. **_

_**Feedback may be needed in order to decide if I should change it or not.**_

_**My next update will either be **__Gossip is never True__**, or **__TWWL__**, or **__Rebels__**, or **__Hinata Hyuga adventures__**, **__Do Over__**, maybe even **__I'll always find you__**…I'm still not sure…**_

* * *

**Chapter 9: Itachi**

I stand in front of my apartment door, I ditched last period because I had to find out more from Sasuke. I couldn't wait… I want to know why he blames Itachi for Hinata's silence.

For some reason I can't go in, I'm scared…I want to hear why but I don't…I'm confused and troubled…

But then suddenly I knock on my door. I gave Sasuke my only set of keys.

"It's me," I shout, "Naruto," I'm not sure why I just yelled out my name to him… The door opens and he stares at me.

"You ditched," he states as he walks away. I close and lock the door behind me.

I can't from words; I walk to my small kitchen and leave my bag on my dinning table.

"You have a nice apartment," Sasuke says.

"Thanks," I shout over my shoulder.

"I'd like to live alone but since I'm the Uchiha heir I can't leave the compound," I turn back to stare at Sasuke as I grab two soda cans.

"I thought Itachi was the heir," I say confused as I walk back to the living room.

"He can't…not anymore…" Sasuke says lowering his head. What does he mean? I watch him then I pop my soda open and he looks up at me.

"Do you love Hinata?" I turn to stare at a serious Sasuke as he watches me closely.

"What is your definition of love?" I retort as I lean back in my leather armchair.

"It's not my definition you should care about but your own," he responds.

"That word doesn't exist in my vocabulary," I reply easily and take a drink from my soda. I put the other soda can in front of Sasuke. He grabs it and plays around with it in his hands. He's distracting himself so he won't hit me for being an idiot.

"Don't lie!" Sasuke simply says. I look away from him. I pause and think about these new emotions that have begun to grow.

"I think it could be love," I admit with sweaty palms, a thundering heart and a red face. This is the first time I've said it out loud.

"There's something you should know…" he stops suddenly as he puts the soda can down. I feel my stomach drop to my feet, I knew it!

I knew Sasuke is in love with Hinata and he isn't going to give her up! Shit that's it! I fell right into his trap! The bastard…

"The reason…I mentioned earlier that I wouldn't tell you why you aren't able to mention Itachi's name to Hinata. But now I feel I should give you the reason for it. The reason Hinata lost her voice was Itachi's fault." My eyes grow huge as I watch Sasuke's pained expression.

"In the past Hinata loved my brother, I think she still might…To her he was her universe…the reason she thought she existed in this world…he was her everything." Sasuke lets out a shaky breath as he takes a small pause. "The Uchiha's and Hyuga's came to an agreement and decided to use both of them to unite the two powerful clans. Hinata and Itachi were happy; at least I thought Itachi was we didn't talk much. I was jealous of Hinata because she was the only one my brother opened up to. They were always together. He walked to our school just to pick her up and escort her back to her compound. I never understood what Itachi saw in Hinata, she was always shy and didn't talk much, but she was in some way outgoing and happy. It was no surprise when ever I found Hinata in our house, she was like family and I was expected to treat her as much. Sometimes they would wander out to the woods in our backyard…" the look in his eyes and on his face shows me that he is seeing something that happened in the past. He pauses and I wait for him to continue his story. Whatever he's going to say next I know will answer my questions.

"That day I walked out of my room to search for something to eat I came down and grew surprised when I found some adult Hyuga's in our house. My mother saw me and asked where I was. I told her in my bedroom. She then asked if I've seen Itachi or Hinata. I remember I looked out the windows and grew surprised to find it raining and dark out. I answered no then she ordered me to my room. I didn't argue because even as a kid I could read the atmosphere. But as I went up the stairs something caught my attention. I went to my dad's open study and saw Hinata just standing there outside the locked French doors. I opened the doors and called out to her after I yelled out her name she turned about to stare at me. I'll never forget those eyes or her expression." He tightly shuts his eyes as he covers his face with his hands then he removes them. "Deep down in my stomach I knew something awful had occurred with tears sliding out of her eyes. At least I thought they were tears, the rain was so falling so hard I wasn't sure. She whispered to me: '_Itachi killed himself and I saw it happened, I couldn't stop him…I'm sorry, it's…I couldn't stop him…_' Her words, voice, everything about Hinata from that night haunts me…those were the last words she ever spoke. I…I told my parents that they shouldn't push Hinata because if they did they would never know what really happened. She was, well is just too fragile to answer any questions." Sasuke looks really haunted by it. Seeing Hinata must remind him that Itachi is dead.

"So he…" I stop as Sasuke looks up at me. "He committed suicide in front of Hinata?" I ask shocked at Itachi's suicide…if I think back to him I could never read him. I never knew if he was lying or what. Itachi was just very difficult to know. But he had everything in the world; he had everything at his disposal, every single thing.

"We think that but we have never found a body. Even after all this time I've been protecting her because she still isn't ready to speak about those events."

"No body?" I whisper my question.

"I have other theories but my family won't listen to them…" Sasuke responds.

"Tell me," I order Sasuke in a loud demanding tone. He raises his eyebrow in question. "Please," I say in my normal voice. He glares at me a while longer.

"I…even though I didn't know Itachi that well, I always got the feeling that he didn't want to be the heir of the Uchiha's. So what if…" Sasuke stops himself as he looks down at the floor. I see him grow a bit embarrassed. "I shouldn't even mention it but…" he turns his face up to stare into my eyes. "What if he faked his suicide in order to get out of all his responsibilities? What Hinata saw might not have been real, she could have thought she saw Itachi commit suicide but could have staged it? And while he's out there living his life away from constraints a Hinata is here stuck in the past. She can't move forward because of him!" I grow surprised when I see Sasuke cry again, "un," I hear him as he passes the back of his hands over his eyes to wipe the tears away.

"He's scarred her in a way that has caused her world to stop on that night. So instead of him dying he killed Hinata, he…killed her…" I whisper as I keep my anger in. I join my hands together in fists as I rest my forehead on them. I feel the hot tears in my eyes blur my vision. "If he did fake his death, he just used her…he made sure she wouldn't speak, he traumatized her." I yell angrily.

I sense Sasuke's gaze on me as I cry silently. If Sasuke is correct then…he seriously did use Hinata just so he could have someone as a witness to his suicide. I hate him, I hate Itachi. I don't care if he really did commit suicide; he still did it in front of her. It's his fault that Hinata's voice is gone. Itachi is to blame.

"I thought it was her dad's fault," I speak up as I keep thinking about Hinata. I now know the truth to those dead eyes that haunt me when I dream about Hinata.

"No, her father is just pathetic. He couldn't take her silence so he forced her to leave. From what Hanabi tells me, he checks up on her everyday without anyone knowing."

"He was a complete asshole to her when he came to the school so how could he care about her?" I ask surprised that Sasuke is defending him.

"People have different ways of showing love. Hiashi shows his in the most unconventional way." I guess I sort of understand his pathetic reasoning.

"How did Itachi commit suicide in front of Hinata?" I ask Sasuke after a short pause.

"There's this waterfall a few miles away from the compound. Itachi taught Hinata and me how to swim in a lake under the waterfall, there's this thirty feet high waterfall that Itachi liked to stand on. Well next to it, but from what Hinata said was that he jumped off of it."

I sit back in my chair. He jumped off of a thirty feet waterfall? He jumped to his death. Hinata must've felt so helpless, watching as the man she love threw himself…

Fuck that's some ugly shit she lived through…

"How old was she?" I ponder out loud.

"Seven years old," Sasuke responds. I now understand why Sasuke and Hinata are so close.

"Seven…" I whisper as I throw myself back in my sofa. "If your brother is still alive I will hunt him down. He doesn't deserve to live." I say up at the ceiling.

"It's really weird," I hear Sasuke comment, I turn my eyes to him. "You've always been interested in yourself and never about anyone else. So to see you react like this…it's surprising to say the least. Most of all it's freaking me out. It makes me think the world is out of whack." He tells me with an ironic smile on his lips. I glare at his stupid smiling face.

"This isn't the time for you to tease me. Have you tried looking for Itachi? Have someone search for him? Hired anyone?" I'm trying to get him to forget about my lack of self interest.

The world is seriously out of whack. I never thought I could fall in love with a girl. Much less someone as damaged as Hinata Hyuga. Love seriously fucks people up.

* * *

What I feel for Naruto can not be love, it just can't. I mean it's too soon. I don't know anything about him. All I know is that Naruto and Sasuke knew each other when they were kids and are still pretty close.

I bring my bent legs up to my chest and rest my forehead on my knees. This just feels wrong, it's really twisted and not in a good way.

I mindlessly watch the TV I can't think straight.

"_Hinata,"_ I hear someone call out to me. I quickly open my eyes and find my apartment empty. That voice heard so familiar. _"Promise me you'll never speak again. No matter how hard everyone forces you to talk you'll never tell anyone."_

"_I promise you," _I answer him. I cover my ears. What is this? Why am I hearing this? What can this mean?

"_But don't ever forget about me and how you feel towards me,"_ He orders me, and then I hear a blood curdling scream.

My eyes open wide as I see the sunshine through my large windows. That had to be a nightmare. It had to be, I didn't see anything it was all black I just heard the voices. I close my eyes hoping to get rid of these feelings of guilt and sorrow.

I stand on shaky feet and walk to my bedroom. This is the last time I sleep on the sofa.

I felt so real…those feelings…the words all of it had to be real. I must have lived through this but why don't I remember it? I change into the school uniform without thinking.

I grab all the bentos and my shoulder bag. I walk out of my apartment and don't bother locking the door.

The conversation keeps playing in my head.

"Oi Hinata!" I hear a familiar voice call out to me. I ignore him and keep walking as I stay focused on the cement under me. "Hey! Didn't you hear me call out to you?" Naruto asks me. I nod and keep my eyes down. "That's just mean you know. It took a lot of balls to call out to you like that." He's pretending to be angry, I shrug off his words. I want to be alone. "Here let me take those," he says as he takes the bentos away.

I finally look up and I see his smiling face. Seeing Naruto like this calms me. He makes me feel that everything will turn out fine. All my problems fade away and it scares me. I shouldn't feel this peace. Not me. I don't deserve it.

"Are you alright?" he questions me softly as he leans down towards me. I move away and nod my answer. I feel my face become hot; I felt his breath on my cheek… I walk faster. "Hey hold on, Hinata!" he calls out to me. I shouldn't get close to him. I don't want to be near him, he makes me want to forget everything. Every single emotion of not caring what anyone thinks…Naruto makes me want to be normal…

"I have feelings for you!" he suddenly shouts at me from behind. I stop walking as I stand here unable to breath. "I mean, I think of you as a friend, which is an honor by the way so don't shut me out. If you do I'll probably become an outcast and resort to stealing banks and stuff then I'll be shot to death and I'll blame you for my fate. It'll be on you!" he yells.

I really wish I had a notepad so that I could write to him and call him an idiot. How dare he say that! It so will not be my fault it would be his for resorting to such maneuvers and stuff. I'm not guilty of anything. Instead I just turn my face to glare at him. He smiles uneasily.

"I-I'm not…that is…I didn't mean to…what can I say?" he asks me as he walks closer to me. "I'm an idiot that doesn't know when to keep his mouth shut, sorry. I really have a problem don't I?" He questions me softly and with a chuckle.

I nod my agreement. "See, you-" he suddenly stops as he looks ahead; I follow the direction of his eyes and see a beautiful woman that has bright red hair. Her large sunglasses cover her eyes, I look at her clothing and find the dress she's wearing very cute, I wonder if I could pull off such a colorful dress. Does Naruto know her?

I look back at Naruto and the expression on his face makes me think that the lady may be a ghost. He looks so shocked to see her that I wonder who she is to him.

"Naruto…" the lady says as she nears us. "Naruto." She pulls off her sunglasses and I see her violet eyes look at Naruto, the love she feels for him shines through them.

Wait, is Naruto a gigolo? Could this be his current sugar mama? Oh my god! I can't believe it! He's _that_ kind of guy. I can't wait to tell Sasuke what his best friend does for a living!

"Leave me alone," he says, his voice makes goose bumps go down my back. He…I turn my head back to stare at an enraged Naruto. He looks like he wants to kill the lady in front of me. "Go to hell!" he yells out. He then grabs my arm and pulls me away. His short nails dig into my skin as he continues to drag me behind him. I try to pull my arm away but his hold is to strong. So I poke his arm, he suddenly looks back at me and notices my red arm. He quickly takes his hand off of me.

"Shit! I'm sorry, fuck I'm such a…" I stop him as I look into his eyes, they show his regret but I still see the anger he feels. "This is not my day…" he can't complete his sentences. "I feel…I can't…" he suddenly looks into me and I realize that he wants to leave me but doesn't know if he should. I gently remove the bentos from his tight grip and smile at him. His expression changes as he keeps looking into my eyes. "I-what I do best is run. I'm sorry but I don't think I'll be able to sit still in class so I'm going to leave…is that okay?" he whispers to me. I untie the knot of the cloth on top of the bentos. I hand him the bento I prepared for him and he slowly reaches forward for it. "Are you sure?" he asks me in a whisper. I nod yes and he holds it in his hands. "Thank you, tell Sasuke that I'm sorry," he says to me before he walks away.

Just who was she to him? I feel that I shouldn't ask him because I won't get an answer from him. His expression showed that he didn't want to talk about her or anything. What does she mean to Naruto? Who is she? I shake off this insecure feeling off of me as I enter the school. I turn back to stare at Naruto's retreating back; he looks so small as he goes away.

"What are you staring at?" Sasuke asks me, I turn back and see Sasuke look forward in the direction I was looking at. I turn around and face Sasuke, I shake my head. "Okay, so how about you come inside now, class starts in a few minutes. If we're late the principal might give us detention again." Sasuke reaches out for my hand and leads me towards the classroom. I stare down at his hand and it doesn't feel the same as Naruto's hand. Wait, I look up at Sasuke's back and find myself wondering why he's stuck around, what do I mean to him?

I've never wanted my voice more than ever. I need to speak, I have to get across to Sasuke, and I have questions he needs to answer me. What can I do to get him to answer me?

"I love you," Sasuke says out of nowhere, I feel I can't breath. He turns around and I find a blush on his face, he looks so different, that look in his eyes shows his innocence. "I always have even when you were with…" he pauses for a minute as he looks into my eyes. "This is a burden for you isn't it?" he whispers. I shake my head but he's already decided that it is. "How can I be stupid enough to tell you this? I love you yet you haven't even noticed me. It must have been my talk with Naruto that has me telling you about this. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to…I do you know. I really love you, so much that it hurts me to see you mute like this. Can't you at least say something?" he whispers.

Instead of talking I walk forward and hug him to me. I hold him tight against me as I close my eyes against the tears. I can't love Sasuke, he can't love me either. I know it, he knows it.

I want to tell him to not to lie to me but I can't find the words. I can't form the words in my mouth; I need him to understand that what he feels is not love. It can't be.

"Do you love Naruto?" he asks me, I pull away from him as I stare at him. Did he just…I pull up my arm and flatten my hand as I slap him across the cheek.

He lied to me! I feel my tears burn my eyes. He just said all that so that I could answer him. He doesn't love me, no one does. Sasuke doesn't…

I give him my back as I run away from Sasuke. He just played with me like it was nothing…what a…

"Hinata?" I look at the entrance of the school and see Hanabi there. "Onee-sama what is the matter?" she asks me. I shake my head and wipe my tears away. "Onee-sama, would you like to come home?" she questions me. I stand still as I look over at her. Could this mean that I'll be able to live with them again? That I can be with my family again?

I nod as I feel Sasuke's betrayal still sting but having Hanabi here is making me feel better.

"_I love you_," his words are still lingering me; I give Hanabi my back and run back to Sasuke. I have to get him to answer me. Why did he just proclaim his love for me? What is his reason for such a lie? Sasuke is my best friend and he means too much to me and I can't accept his lie. I have to figure out why he said that.

I find Sasuke in the same spot where I left him. I put my shoulder bag on the floor and take out my notepad and marker.

_Why are you lying to me? What do you gain from hurting me?_ I turn the pad over and show it to him.

"Let's talk about during lunch," he answers. I grab the back of his shirt and keep him in place. He glares back at me and I mouth the words.

_No, now!_ His eyes grow huge as he realizes what I just did.

"No, I don't want to talk about it." He says regaining his composer; he shoves my hand off of his shirt. I tackle Sasuke from behind and he lets out an oaf as he lands hard on the ground and I pin him to the floor.

_Tell me!_ I mouth. I get off of him and he stays on the floor looking up into my angry expression. I go to my notepad and begin to write. _You are my brother, you are the one person I was always able to count on, the one person who was always there for me so why are you doing this to me? Why are you hurting me with this lie Sasuke? _I throw the notepad on his face and he picks it up and reads my sloppy words.

"My feelings are true, I do love you. So don't call it a lie! This is true, my feelings are true so don't deny them! I sure as hell don't understand why, maybe because I can't have you and that's why I love you. But then again it can be because over time I've noticed how awesome you really are. I don't know, I can't explain it but I love you Hinata…" he admits to me as he looks down at the floor. "I'm pretty stupid to be putting all of this on you but I had to tell you before you decided to actually move on from-" he stops himself from going on. "God, it's just so hard to talk to you but not talk about…" he pauses. "How would you react if I mentioned his name to you? Would you suffer a mental breakdown? Or would you actually be able to talk…would you be able to use your voice?" he ponders as he walks closer to me.

"Sasuke Uchiha, don't you dare speak that name to my Onee-sama!" I hear Hanabi yell out. I find her standing next to me. "What are you doing?" she shouts.

"I'm…I told her the truth, I love her Hanabi…" he speaks up to my sister. I watch as my sister's expression changes, she looks so sad, so heartbroken.

"But I thought…you and me? What was that?" she asks keeping her feelings inside.

"Let's talk about this some other time," Sasuke says and I lift my head to look around and find us in the middle of a crowd. I see Shino and Gaara staring at me, TenTen is with Temari and they too watch us. Kankuro, Shikamaru, Chouji, Kiba, Sai and Ino look at me waiting for me to do something; to say something. I start to see the edges of my vision become black until finally everyone is gone.

"_Don't ignore me Hinata, I've always been a part of you, it's time you acknowledge me, you promised you wouldn't forget about me. You said that you would always remember me, so why have you removed me from your heart? Why is Sasuke there instead? Why?"_ The scary voice from earlier is calling out to me. I want to get away. Why do I fear this voice? Why do I want it to go away? Who is he to me? _"I took your voice…" _

I can't breath, I can't…my voice is gone and I can't tell anyone that I can't breath, I can't…

* * *

_**There finally you guys know why she can't talk. So yeah, don't worry she wasn't raped then had her child taken away from her, she just lost it because of Itachi. **_

_**I hope you guys don't hate me for the reason.**_

_**Next chapter will be Sasuke's chapter looking back at the past…**_


	10. Childhood

**SoujouInLove**: You'd probably be disappointed if you did meet me in reality.

I will check it out today!

So happy! I' am in another story not so much for this one. So I' am a cruel cruel person. It would be child abuse. I'm an extremely evil and twisted person, at least as author in real life I'm a normal girl! I never knew there was a "iluvorangetulips" way, I'm honored! You have made my new year!

I'm glad, I just hope I don't disappoint you! You are too kind, I wish I was brilliant but you honor me with such kind words! Thank you!

I hope your nightmares weren't so bad, Hinata forgives you for having nightmares of her.

Totally fine! My parents are still protective of me even though I'm of age…parents pfbt!

Okay I will! I'm glad she did!

Thanks I need it, I hope you like this chapter, it's really short…you must tell me the truth about what you think, I need to read it! You are too kind and I hope I don't disappoint you any further!

**E-Y-J Studio**: Hello I just read SoujouInLove's review and appreciate you reading it and liking it! I hope you continue to enjoying reading it! Thanks so much!

**CheezingIt54**: Seriously he is!

Poor Hinata indeed…or is she lucky?

Yup you are spot on! It really is out, did you like the secret? Or was it blah? Must know! There does, like what really happened to Itachi, who will Hinata speak to first, what is Kushina's intentions, what is going on with Hanabi and Sasuke, but most of all who will Hinata chose?

Thanks so much, you don't understand how much your awesome words help me continue the story! I just hope I don't lose your interest!

**Hinata6**: I feel like you're going to get irritated with me with such long e-mails and replying to you so quickly! I don't give you time to breathe! Sorry! But I'm really happy, now to your review!

I'm really glad it did, I myself enjoy surprising people! Yeah, totally love different, I want to be a different type of writer! You have no idea. I'm still trying to decide who should see him first… I'm so glad you like my story! I like to bring a little bit of happiness to my friends lives! Just know that you made my year!

True, one sort of backed down and the other one wouldn't. I'm still trying to decide what she will do…that'll be a surprise for next chapter. No, it isn't Karin but Naruto's mom. You'll find out a bit more about her in a coming chapter.

Oh how you make me happy! I feel like a kid that found her favorite toy again! So happy!

I have to admit that this story is short, really short. I hope you enjoy it!

* * *

_**This chapter was made possible because of Hinata6! Thanks so much for all of your encouragement B!**_

_**So this is Sasuke's own short POV, and the last part is Naruto.**_

_**Is my writing confusing or something? I get requests to label whose POV it is but I just can't do it…**_

_**Even though some of you might not care this chapter was inspired by Hinata6 of course but also with the help of the songs "Sometime Around Midnight" by The Airborne Toxic Event and "The Story" by Brandi Carlile.**_

_**Without further ado…forgive me for the short chapter but it feels correct for Sasuke to have a short chapter, he's a mystery after all!**_

_**

* * *

**_

**Chapter 10: Childhood**

I find myself sitting next to Hinata as she lays on one of the beds of the school's infirmary. She fainted outside of the school grounds and I carried her inside. Hanabi had to leave so I'm the only one here for her.

It's always been like that just me and Hinata…Hinata and me…always…until Itachi took her away from me.

I knew that I shouldn't have told her the truth but she made me so angry. She can't tell me what I do feel and what I don't feel. But even I can admit that my love for Hinata isn't as pure as Naruto's. My love for Hinata has been tainted by Itachi. He ruined everything.

From the start the Uchiha's and the Hyuga's have wanted to unite. Actually Hinata's mom was supposed to marry my dad but then the future leader of the Hyuga's wanted her so he got her.

I was born and many months later Hinata was born, to our respective families. The families then decided that it would be Hinata and I that would unite the two families but then Itachi intervened.

He said that the firstborn's should marry each other after all it was only logical. But I know what he saw in Hinata. She was timid and quiet. Itachi thought that he'd be able to control her and the Hyuga fortune. Itachi never once loved Hinata. There was always an ulterior motive to his decisions.

But I could be wrong. Itachi was an enigma to me. I could truthfully say that he was a mystery and continues to be one.

Hinata as a kid would always come to our house to play with me or to study. It was during those times that I fully understood what I felt for Hinata was love and that Itachi slowly began to twist it into something far uglier.

* * *

"_I know all my hiragana!" Hinata tells Itachi as he walks into the room._

"_I expect no less from you," Itachi says with a fake smile. "How about you Sasuke?" I nod my answer._

"_Nii-san you shouldn't come and bother us because when you do Hinata forgets everything and only focuses on you." I say as I look down at my workbook._

"_Someone is jealous," he replies._

"_I like butterflies!" Hinata randomly says. We both turn to look at her. "Crows are funny, pigeons are cuter than penguins and I like listening to classical music it makes me happy!" Hinata admits with a pretty smile and tilt of the head._

"_That's good," Itachi says as he pats her head. "I just wanted to say hi but I've got my own work to do." He then leaves._

_She turns to me and smiles; she starts to hum as she continues to do her homework._

_Sometimes I wonder if she does this to make Itachi leave._

"_Sasuke are you going ahead of our homework?" she questions me. I nod as I look down at the book I brought home. Sensei doesn't know that I took this book home. "I'm going to tell on you," she threatens._

_I look up at her and wonder if she's more perceptive than I thought._

"_Why are you my friend?" I suddenly ask her, she doesn't look up from her paper as she responds._

"_Because I like you and you need me," she answers me._

"_Why do I need you?" I question her, she looks up then. Her eyes have grown wider like she's flabbergasted I haven't figured it out yet._

"_If I'm not your friend then you'd forget that you are a kid," her response leaves me astonished. She happily smiles at me then turns her attention back to her homework. _

_There are times when she surprises me like this and I wonder if it's this that I love the most of Hinata. Her ability to see and know the real me._

_

* * *

_

_I've always been the type of kid that was cynical. Where Hinata saw butterflies as cute I saw them as freaky insects that acted beautiful for an ulterior motive. I learned from a young age that we're all predators in some sense or another. Every single person on the Earth does something to benefit themselves._

_My parents never even tried to get to know me; they let their servants raise me. That's how my cynical side came to be. I realized that all of these people are here because they are paid. Sometimes they'd forget all about me and I'd have to fend for myself. Some of them would steal money from my family and my parents wouldn't notice._

_I watched as these people would milk my parents for the most amount of money. It was in their best interest for their own sake to make more money for less work…_

_

* * *

_

"_Sasuke your hold is too tight," my eyes open and I find a seven year old Hinata. My hand shakes as I clutch onto her arm._

_Hinata is the only one who hasn't betrayed me. There is no underhanded motive for her friendship. She leans forward and pulls back her bangs with her hand. She rests her forehead on mine. I close my eyes._

"_You aren't sick, are you okay?" she asks me as she pulls back. I hug her to me and she falls on top of me on my bed._

"_Never stop being my friend, never. I need you Hinata even if Itachi tells you not to see me anymore don't listen. Be with me forever," I whisper in her ear._

_She pulls away and looks down at me I feel my face turn redder. "Stupid we will always be friends," she confesses as she gets off of me. "Hurry up Itachi wants to leave, right?" I feel my color drain as I slowly turn to stare at my brother's emotionless eyes look at me. "It's going to be fun! I'll finally know how to swim, will it be difficult?" she asks as she jumps towards Itachi. _

_I look away from the two of them. Did he hear everything? I know he saw it but…_

"_Hinata why don't you go eat breakfast while Sasuke gets ready?" he semi-orders her._

"_All righty!" she announces jumping out of my room, she waves bye to me as she goes through the open door. Itachi closes it and I stand up from my bed._

"_Do you want her?" he suddenly asks me._

"_No," I announce as I go to my closet. I'm shaking._

"_She's mine you know that yet you still desire her. Do you want her because she's mine? Or do you want her to take her away from me? She loves me, she loves me more than she does you," why does he have to be like this? I keep my back to him._

"_I don't care," I respond._

"_Liar, you have always wanted what was mine, always was jealous of what I had. It's pathetic Sasuke. Or is it that you want me?" I whirl around and glare at him._

"_That's just disgusting!" I yell._

"_Is it? Maybe you want Hinata out of the way so that we could be together. I've heard of little brothers loving their older brothers in a sexual sense," he has a straight face I can't tell if he's joking or what. What he says has me shaking in anger. "Sasuke I never knew you were that type of guy," he says as he slowly walks to me._

"_Get out of my room! Get out!" I scream, he laughs that cold laugh and starts to make his way to the door._

"_You just want her because you can't have her. What you feel for Hinata isn't love far from it. It stems from an ugly obsession you have with me, isn't that right little brother?" he leaves my room closing the door softly on his way out._

_Is it true? Is my love tainted and not pure like I thought it was? Could he be right? I suddenly feel like I have to throw up. I don't feel up to going with them so I stay in my room. I go to my window and watch as Hinata runs outside and Itachi walks after her. He suddenly turns back to look up at me and I walk away from my window._

_It can't be true; my love for Hinata is pure. I never thought of him when I fell for Hinata, he never crossed my mind. Or am I lying to myself…_

_

* * *

_

_I walk to school Hinata didn't wait for me. All weekend I stayed in my room, Hinata didn't come over after she left with Itachi. He returned at night. It feels weird not having her next to me as she randomly says things. I run to school wanting to talk to her before she enters class. I get there faster and I find her alone in the classroom. She looks at me and her eyes, something is wrong. Her feelings can't be seen in her lavender eyes. She's closed off from me…I start to panic as she sits there and I stand in the doorway._

"_Good morning," I say to her, she looks away from me. My throat grows dry. "Why didn't you come back?" I whisper forcing my mouth to form the words and to make the sounds…_

"_I can't be your friend anymore Sasuke," she says with her face bent down. "Itachi-sama forced me to promise not to speak to you again; I have to listen to him."_

"_But you promised me first," I respond walking to her sitting form._

"_It doesn't matter, Itachi-sama is my future husband, I have to listen to him," she still avoids looking at me. I feel the tears form in my eyes. I can't cry, not now._

"_You really do love him more than me?" I question her; this is what I want her to answer most of all. I have to hear her response, this is what is going to make me decide if I'll fight for her or just not care anymore. She slowly looks up and those eyes, the ones that I love become cold and they suddenly freeze my whole body._

"_Yes, Itachi-sama will always come first," she answers in a hollow voice that isn't like Hinata at all._

"_I hate you, I hate you so much! You're just like all of them, no you are the worst! I trusted you, I trusted you and…I thought we were friends…I thought we would be together…even after you married Itachi. Just die!" I yell at her as I run out of the classroom. I don't wait for her to respond or anything._

_

* * *

_

The two of us got along because she was going to be family. But I grew to love her because she understood me, she got me…she knew me the best…

Like always Itachi ruined it, he ruined our friendship. Neither spoke to me again, they acted as if I didn't exist they left me out. I was happy, so happy…but then later that year Itachi committed suicide and it changed Hinata. For some reason she erased Itachi from her memory. She acted as if she didn't remember him. There are no memories of Itachi in her; they probably reside in her heart locked away in a safe.

After everything she turned to me, with no voice she came to me like a wounded and abused puppy. I took one look into her eyes and knew she needed me. I couldn't bring myself to give her my back. I walked and she followed, she waited outside of the boy's bathroom each time I went to the bathroom. How could I turn my back to her?

When people picked on her, I looked away as she pleaded with me with her eyes. Without saying a word with her mouth her eyes showed that she wanted me to save her. Only then did I give her my back. A part of me was happy when she was picked on because long ago she gave me her back; she chose Itachi over me and still does.

She lost her voice because of Itachi. She still holds a part of him in her and that kills me. Even after his death he's leading her life. He made her like this and she doesn't even try to change. She disgusts me yet I can't keep away.

I love her none the less…

I love her and know that this love I feel isn't what real love is supposed to be…

My love for Hinata is tainted just like Itachi predicted…

He still leads my life after his death too…he shaped our futures…

I look down at Hinata as she lies there. For some reason I feel she's awake but is pretending to be asleep. She wants me to leave.

"I never wanted my feelings to bring you down," I speak up swallowing the lump in my throat. "I love you Hinata, I really do. It doesn't mean you have to love me back. Just continue to rely on me until you could stand on your own. At least do that for me. After everything I've suffered because of you I want you to still need me. Don't accept my hand when you fall just continue to want me…continue to seek me out…don't give me your back again…I don't know if I could survive if you do again…I've suffered enough haven't I?" I question her. I grab my stuff and leave the room. Before I do I look back and see a six year old Hinata.

"_Sasuke is the best person in the whole wide world! My bestest friend! I love you more than pigeons and crows! Tons more! Now follow my lead and let's go back to the classroom hopping on one leg! Promise me that we'll be together forever?_"

"I promise to be with you through everything," I whisper the same response as so many years ago. I have to let her go don't I? I have to let go of this Hinata, the one I remember and fell in love with.

She isn't the Hinata I knew, she isn't at least not anymore and that hurts me.

* * *

I run as fast as I can, I have to get away from her. How did she find me? Jiraiya promised me that she would never find me, that I would be safe from her. How is it that my mother found me?

I hate her, I hate her! She is the reason my dad killed himself, she is the sole reason that I have no father. She ruined his life, she killed him! It is because of her that I can't live a normal life, she is to blame. She killed me when she killed dad. I hate her.

I never had the warmth of a mother, never understood love because of her. It's her fault I run away, her fault I can't love Hinata properly. I run into an alley out of breath and I fall down. I figured she would still be here. After all in her own eyes she did no wrong.

How could she be so bold? How dare she speak to me like nothing happened? It's almost as if she's acting like she never left me with a father that was slowly killing himself because of her.

"_Naruto, don't hate your mother. It was never her fault; I've been a weakling, a weakling that death overtook. It's not Kushina's responsibility that I'm so weak_…" those were my father's last words to me.

How could he expect me not to blame her? She left me with him, she made me watch him die…little by little…she could've taken me with her but she made me stay with dad…

I can't forgive her and never will. I won't!

I'd rather go to hell then forgive her.


	11. Past

**ByakuganHyuuga360:** Is it really? I always feel bad for Naruto and he's my favorite character and I wanted him to have the shining moment and you know actually get the girl through love and determination! Thank you for the exception! I know I hate him too…and yet there will be more Itachi to come! Bwhahaha!

**CheezingIt54**: I know! I never really get to write them as kids and I was like I bet Hinata was an outgoing little girl who bossed Sasuke around without him noticing!

I always wanted her to be like that just sprout random stuff during stressful but also happy situations.

That he is, not a fine ass but just a jerk-faced-ass.

I know it'll take a while because you'll know after this chapter why he hates his mom so much. Sasuke on the other part…it's pretty hard because he has his brother's girlfriend as a constant reminder that even if he's dead he's still in charge of his life. But I guess Sasuke could have some happiness in the end…

I will! I will never give up and continue to bother you with this story! I'm so happy they make you happy!

**Takichixhc**: Yay! New reader! Welcome and I'm glad you love it! Because of this I must declare my love for you! Is it unique? Now my love for you has grown ginormous! I'm pretty sure there are some unique stories on here! I should really start reading again. I'm so happy you are and I hope you will continue to!

Sorry it took me so long but I finally made it happen! I actually had most of the chapter typed out last year I just completely forgot about it…sorry!

**Hinata6:** I feel like no time has gone by since this review…it's still the same with the late replies and I promise to reply soon~!

Never feel stupid with me! It's okay to make mistakes but you are not stupid!

Why thank you! I hope you like this chapter! Did you like it? So happy that you did! Yes! I'm telling you this usually when people have asked me I always deny them because it's a spoiler but yup he'll make an appearance! You'll know in this chapter the relationship he had with this parents, and you'll know why he hates his mom so much.

I'm glad that you did it's because of this loser story that I can honestly call you my friend! I hope you enjoy it! By the way the Hinata picture you reblogged for the new anime movie Oh MY GLOB! She is going to be a bad ass character! I know it with that outfit! And stupid Sasuke is going to be a flirt! Oh my GLOB! I can't wait! I secretly hope he flirts with Hinata and all that! Oh I can't wait for it! I hope it's going to be good and the fact that his parents are alive! I feel the tears in my eyes already! Sorry I just had to talk to you about it now! Are you watching animes this season? I'm virtually watching them all! Okay not really but the good ones I' am. This is the season where I've watched the most anime! And it's cool because two of my favorites are licensed for release here so I'll be buying them! But yes we have much to catch up on and I'll reply to the email you sent last year! Glob I'm behind!

* * *

_Hello my favorite people in the world! How are you today? Excited because the awesomeness of Legend of Korra and Young Justice hasn't worn out yet?_

_Saturdays are just like they were when I was a kid!_

_So I enabled anonymous reviews again. Not sure if it's a good decision or not! We'll see…_

_So an update on my life: I got accepted into a State University! So excited yet terrified about it! So I'm not sure how this fall is going to be but I'll try to update these months because I believe that fall semester begins in August…so yes I finally got that stupid C in calculus. Just last year I was crying because of a D and now I graduated from my community college! Didn't attend my graduation but that's all right._

_I guess that's all…oh I hope all of you are doing well!_

_And I'm mostly on _**tumblr**_ by the way! If you're on there and don't mind following me and if you tell me who you are I'll follow you back my page is: _**comicsare4women2**_ so you guys can see for yourselves just how much of a dork I really am! Now that's it! I hope you enjoy this chapter now without further delay here is the chapter!_

* * *

**Chapter 11: Past**

I wait a few minutes after Sasuke leaves then I open my eyes. Does he really love me?

I can't…Sasuke has always been with me, he's always been there. Will I be able to act like I normally do after this? What about Naruto?

This love I'm starting to feel for Naruto is it real? Do I love Naruto? I decided that I did but I feel that I shouldn't want him anymore because of Sasuke. I know he doesn't want to pressure me but I can't just tell him no. Sasuke…he's like my brother just like Neji.

I have to give Sasuke a chance don't I?

But then I think about that voice that I've heard. Am I trying to forget that man? Why don't I want to remember him? Are the memories bad or good? Could they change me? But why do I force myself to not remember?

I have so many questions about myself that I can't even answer.

"Hinata do you want to go to class?" I shake my head "Or do you want to continue to rest?" I nod and lay on my side as Shizune-sensei continues to do her work and closes the curtain around my bed.

Everything is so complicated. I just want to live a peaceful like without any troubles.

Why did I…the tears start to fall, I don't…I cry silently as I start to wonder if I'm going to lose Sasuke…Please not him.

I spent all day in the nurse's office. Now its lunch time and I lost my courage. I was going to eat lunch with Sasuke but I lost my nerve.

Now here I sit in the library eating alone. I never realized how lonely it really is. Sasuke is probably out there having fun with all the girls. I use my chopsticks to stab my rice.

"It isn't the rice's fault that you my friend are an idiot," I stare up surprised to find Sasuke here. "I was waiting for you all day and nothing. No Hinata to be seen. I knew you'd be in here like a loner. Remember this Hinata you are not alone in the world." I feel my eyes grow huge. "Believe that you have friends who will be with you through everything."

I keep my eyes on him. How should I react? I don't fully understand what it means to feel. All my life I was advised to never show how I feel or what I'm thinking. My sensei's always told me to not feel anything. When I'm with Sasuke it's different. But right now I'm conflicted. What am I supposed to express? Gratitude? Happiness? Sorrow? What is it that I'm supposed to feel?

I look up at Sasuke wondering what he thinks I should feel instead I watch as he comes over to me and sits next to me.

"I had a similar upbringing. So even I' am having troubled feelings. I'm not sure what you're supposed to feel. I'm not going to tell you. I think you have to discover them yourself. That way you'll learn how to feel all on your own." Sasuke can be pretty wise if he puts his mind to it. I smile at him and nod my agreement. "Do you know where Naruto is?" Sasuke questions me.

I take out my notepad and pen and write down.

_We were walking to school together when a lady came and called out to him. It looked like he saw a ghost, then he got angry. She was really pretty._

I stare at Sasuke amazed at how his jaw hangs open. I sort of want to put my finger in his mouth…

"Holy shit…" he mumbles. "Did you notice anything weird about him?" he questions me in a urgent manner.

_Like he was in a hurry and wanted to run for it._

"Fuck!" he shouts this is so not Sasuke. He never yells or gets surprised. So to see him react this way makes me feel like I should fall off my chair.

"Shut up Uchiha-san!" Shiho sensei screams. My eyes grow huge at her reaction. She really doesn't like Sasuke. I lower myself in my chair to avoid her angry gaze. Sasuke's should get in trouble not me.

"Look," Sasuke directs his words at me. "I have to go look for Naruto before he does anything idiotic. I'm sorry." He rushes the words out before he bolts for it. I stand up surprised at his reactions. Sasuke can actually feel…no he loves Naruto like a brother…

"Don't think about him!" I look back and find a young girl standing by the bookcase behind me.

_Who are you?_

"You before you lost your voice," she responds. "I have your voice because I'm protecting you, if you tell the truth you'd be breaking your promise. You can't break your promise, you can't!" she pleads with me in a desperate voice.

_When will I get my voice back?_

"You can't ever get it back if you do you'll give away his secrets. We must protect them at all costs! He depended on us! It means the world that he chose us! Is your voice more important than him?" she asks me growing angry.

_Yes._

"We've changed. He was my sun now he's but a fog in your heart. Is there no meaning in your life? Who are you Hinata? I knew who I was but what about you?" she questions me as she looks into me and waits for my answer.

_I' am the quiet girl who never cries in front of her tormenters, Sasuke's best friend and a girl who is falling in love with Uzumaki Naruto._

"Yo," I look back over my shoulder and see a smiling Chouji and an embarrassed Shikamaru. "We were in the main hallway when we saw Sasuke run out of the entrance. Is everything all right?" he asks me in a concerned manner. I was about to nod but I shake my head and walk to my writing pad and write.

_No, Sasuke is concerned that Naruto is going to do something stupid. So he went to go look for him._

"Isn't Sasuke lazy? I mean he never ran in P.E. so it was freaky to watch him running like that it felt like the world was going to end. Who knew he could care for anyone else." Shikamaru comments as he takes a seat at the table in front of me I go back to the chair I was sitting at before and sit down.

_Does he run funny? Do you have video proof? I always thought he had no physical strength in him. But I think Naruto and Sasuke are in a "special" relationship together. Maybe you four could double date?_

"Ha ha, it seems our secret is out," Chouji says as he puts his arm around Shikamaru's shoulders. My eyes widen and I feel my jaw drop. I knew it! I knew they were together!

"We're kidding jerk," Shikamaru speaks up. "Look we're straight and honestly admit that we are really close we love each other but not in a sexual sense. Why can't two guys be close without being viewed as gay?"

_Can girls be close to each other without guys imagining them making out behind closed doors? _I question them as I stare at them with a skeptical glance.

"Y-yes!" Chouji stammers with pink cheeks and avoids looking at me in the eyes.

"Ino and Sakura…" Shikamaru murmurs with a silly grin on his lips.

_Idiots_, I write down before leaning towards them and flicking their foreheads with my bent fingers.

"Ow!" they say in unison as they reach up to run their forehead.

"Hinata there is no need for violence," Chouji semi-shouts.

_Violence solves all the world problems so violence is definitely needed here_. I scribble quickly.

"You should've talked to us like this before," Shikamaru murmurs as he looks away from me.

_I'm sorry_. I begin; _I don't understand what lead me to stop communicating with all my friends. At the time when I lost my voice Sasuke was the only one who didn't treat me differently. All of you starred at me with pity and I hated it. I had no need for pity what I wanted was for you guys to understand me and hear me without a voice but now I comprehend that I was stupid. Sasuke never understood me and I feel that everyone would've continued to care about me even though I can't talk. After all, we were just kids it was hard to understand. I hope we can start over again and be friends like we were once before. Is that okay?_

Next thing I know I'm pulled out of my chair and I' am being bear hugged by Chouji. He lifts me off my feet and circles around; I get dizzy when he sets me down.

"We've wanted to hear that for the longest time," Shikamaru admits with a happy smile. I find my eyes get blurry and I roughly rub my tears away.

It feels like I'm starting to return to the child I was. Maybe I can be like who was before when I was always surrounded by friends. Maybe I'm getting closer to receiving my voice.

"No you aren't," I hear myself in the back of my head

Chouji hugs me again and this time I find my arms circling around his softness.

* * *

I look at her doorbell and before I can think it over more I ring her doorbell as I stand outside Hinata's apartment.

I don't know why I'm here; it's two in the morning. I stop ringing the doorbell and give the door my back just then the door opens.

I look into her eyes and find myself losing myself in the lavender abyss. She suddenly moves to the side. I take that as her invitation and step into her entrance. I grab some slippers and walk in silently. I show her the bento and she grabs it. She motions for me to sit down at her dining table and I do. A few minutes later she returns with a tray full of food. She sets up the table and I watch her hands. They look so pale.

"I'm sorry for bothering you so late. You didn't have to make me food," I tell her. She shakes her head and reaches for the white board and writes.

_I'm an insomniac, I can't sleep at night. I sleep a few hours during the day. Plus I always make too much food. You are welcome here anytime. _I read it once more to make sure I read it correctly.

I look into her eyes and find myself talking without thinking.

"I'm using you," I blurt out. She looks at me without judging anything I'm saying. "I'm like everyone else who go to you to spill their secrets. I just want to get it off my chest. I don't want to lie to you anymore," I confess. She erases what she wrote earlier.

_I don't mind being used by you since you admitted it. But before you continue eat first or else it'll get cold. We have all night for you to talk to me about what's troubling you._

How can the one girl who can't talk know exactly what to write?

I know she has something to say but is waiting until we are done eating. I've always had a difficult time connecting to people. I never understood why people wanted someone else to get them. But as I sit here in silence I finally understand the concept, the need to have someone in my life that gets me. There is this comfort and security in life, I've missed it. I hide my face as the tears slide down my cheeks. This is all because of her…I'm feeling this because of the lady…I hate her.

I feel Hinata's warmth and I look up to find her hand on top of mine and she squeezes my fingers. I continue to eat with one hand. Being with her it makes me feel like home…

Once I'm done eating Hinata brings over some mint tea with sugar cookies

I drink the tea and reach out for a cookie as I go over what I want to talk to her about.

I look to my right and find her sitting next to me with the whiteboard on her lap. Her hands hold onto the warm teacup with both hands. Her empty yet beautiful eyes focus on me. I feel my jaw loosen as I stare down at my steaming tea.

"I had a good childhood," I begin my story. "I had a wonderful dad and mom. We were happy but my mom she was never happy. She always wanted more and forced my dad to make even more money than he already had. But it never satisfied her. My dad he did some shady deals and he lost it all because of it. Mom stayed for a month but then she left my dad and me. By then my dad had turned to alcohol for comfort and to take him out of the reality that was his life. I had to be the adult at the age of seven. I could barely write yet I went out shopping, made the food, and cleaned the house. I took care of everything because my dad wouldn't function like an adult would. They only time he would do anything was when he went out to by his sake and beer, he always told me he loved me and was happy that I stayed with him and didn't leave him like my mother did. He was…he used to be a very happy man, he was strong, his eyes had this determination that never broke, he was nice and loving, he was everything to me. I hate my mom because she killed him, she killed that strong man that loved me and the city, he lived to serve everyone…he turned to alcohol because of her and she just abandon her family to rot because she couldn't get any more money out of us." I think back to those days and I become sweaty and shake. I look up at Hinata and look into those eyes that I lose myself in so easily. "He used to always tell me that I shouldn't hate my mom, that none if it was her fault. I watched my dad deteriorate, I watched as the alcohol killed him, slowly. No one had any idea it had gotten this bad by the time Jiraiya found us I had been with my dad's dead body for a week." I finally let out the truth. The reason I ran and continue to run. I watched my father die and I couldn't help him. I was a kid who couldn't call for help when I saw my dad get worse.

"I killed him" I cry out and I find myself in her arms and she hugs me tightly. I cry on her shoulders, and I can't stop seeing my father's dead body. I hate that woman, I detest and blame her for my dad's death. If she would've stayed he wouldn't have killed himself like that. He would've been happy and not turned to drinking. Dad would still be alive. We'd be happy. But no, she chose money over love. She left us…

I don't know how much time has passed but I look out her window over her shoulder and notice the sun.

"Why didn't you tell me its morning?" I ask her as I pull away from her thin frame.

She shrugs her shoulders indicating that it doesn't matter.

"Are you going to be okay for school?" I question her and she nods with a weak smile on her lips. "Get dressed I'll go home, take a quick shower and come back so we can go get some coffee," I say before she could respond.

* * *

I wanted to shout out that there was no need but I couldn't. I go to my room and do my hair in braids and put on my uniform double checking that I put on some deodorant. I'm too lazy to take a shower so I go into my kitchen and put on my apron and quickly prepare the bento's for today's lunch. I usually prepare everything the night before and just cook it in the morning and assemble it in the morning too. There is something fun in finding places to add sides or main dishes in such a small container. And there are days where instead of putting steamed rice I put in some noodles or something else. I guess I just really enjoy cooking because it takes my mind off things. I get to follow directions and slowly watch as my food comes together. I never taste it as it cooks, I don't do that I'm not sure why. I just like the rhythm and the order of things. I know some cooks don't follow measurements and just eyeball it but I can't do that. I think there is a reason why there are directions in a recipe and precise measurements because that's how it's meant to be. No more or no less. I hear my doorbell ring and walk to the door and open it to find an out of breath Naruto standing on the other side. He gives me a wide grin and I can't help but smile back.

"Are you ready?" he questions me with a wide smile. I watch him and realize what he's doing, I go to my dining table and get the whiteboard and I write.

_I know that you are suffering after what you told me but I'm telling you now that you do not have to lie to me. Be your true self with me alone_, I write and I watch as his lower lip trembles a bit.

"I don't want to be like that. My dad he wouldn't have wanted me to smile and enjoy life you know? I don't want to be depressed and sad all the time it isn't how he brought me up." He admits to me in a clear and happy voice. I stare at him growing even more jealous of his attitude and resolve. And how he could smile so easily even though he… "Come on let's go buy some coffee," he says as he reaches out for my arm and drags me away. But I stop him and point at the kitchen. "The bentos," he mumbles and I nod. He lets go of me and I walk into my kitchen and finish packing the bentos and cover them with the lids and tie them all together with a cloth and Naruto takes them from me and once again grabs my arm and instead of fighting him I walk behind him in a normal pace.

He can be so impatient just like a child. Wait wouldn't coffee make this worse? Maybe it isn't such a good idea to go get some coffee. He grabs my book bag and puts it over his shoulder on the opposite side of his hip where his rests. Naruto lets go of my arm and I lock my door only to bump into the maid father sends.

"Hyuga-sama good morning," she says as she bows at me. She rises and turns her attention to Naruto and I look over at him and find a funny expression on his face.

"You really are loaded aren't you?" he questions me and I shake my head intending to say that it's my father who is rich. "Oh, I wish I had a rich parent," he mumbles and directs his attention to the maid and bows. "I'm Hinata's friend, my name is Naruto Uzumaki it's a pleasure to meet you," he semi-shouts.

"Thank you for taking care of Hyuga-sama," she says as she bows back at Naruto. He laughs at her.

"She takes care of me," he says with a wide smile. I'm beginning to think that he has no other smile other than his big wide infectious one. "We should be going," he announces as he walks faster than before and I try to keep up. He suddenly looks back and notices my flushed face as I breathe harder.

"I forget that I'm with you I guess this means the stairs are out of the question?" he asks me and I nod vigorously, how does he have so much energy even though he didn't even go to sleep? We wait for the elevator and once the doors open we walk in and wait a few minutes until we stop at the first floor. "I actually don't live that far from here," he tells me as he looks around the elevator. "I saw your light on when I was walking by and I decided to come and check to see if you were still up, so you don't sleep at all at night?" he asks me and I shake my head. I usually take naps after school unless Hanabi comes over then I wait until she leaves to take my nap.

"I noticed that all your lights were on," he tells me and my eyes widen as I stare into his honest eyes. "Are you scared of the dark?" he questions me softly. I can't lie and just nod my answer. "So am I, it's just something about the darkness that it feels like it's enveloping me in some kind of evil entity. Is that what happens to you?" he asks me.

For me it feels as if all my past demons come out to haunt me in the darkness that's why I need all the lights on. The coldness of the darkness makes me shake in fear. He lets go of my arm and the elevator door dings and I walk out of the elevator and wait on the other side for Naruto. He looks at me waiting and takes a few steps forward and I give him my back and walk ahead of him. I think back to what I talked about with Kurenai-sensei and I feel myself turn bright red. Yet I think back to Sasuke's expression when he told me that he loved me…I can't do this to Sasuke. He's my best friend, the one guy who stood by me and never left my side. I can't just not think of loving Sasuke I should give him a chance…I think.

"Something is troubling you," Naruto suddenly says as he leans forward and looks under my bent face. I suddenly feel redder and push his face away with my sweaty hand. Why does he do this? He makes me more nervous than usual. I've never felt this before with any guy. He just makes my heart jump that's the only way to explain it. Is that normal? Am I finally becoming a normal girl? "What is it?" he asks in a sing song voice. I stop and reach for my book bag that Naruto has and take out the yellow legal pad and a blue highlighter. I write down how Sasuke confessed his love to me.

I watch his expression as he reads it and it stays blank then a small smile comes up on his mouth.

"I knew he was lying to me. I could tell he loved you even though he denied it to me to my face even. How do you feel about him? You can't just say no to him it'll put your friendship in jeopardy even though he says it doesn't matter it does. At least it does in dramas and stuff. I've never fallen in love and don't intend to, just like I don't want kids to a women to nag me I plan to be alone the rest of my life," he tells me in a honest clear voice. I watch him for a minute wondering if what happened to his dad turned him away from happiness.

Or is this his own punishment for not saving his dad? Does he plan to live a lonely life?

_He told me that what I decide won't affect our friendship_. I write on the paper. _ I also believe he is lying to me; he doesn't love me not really. If anything he feels something deeper like he cares for me like a sister or something_. It's wrong to ignore his feelings but I can't truly accept them. I don't see Sasuke as a man but as someone whom I cherish as a friend.

"You can't say that without Sasuke telling you that. It's not right for you to deny someone else's feelings, it makes you look weak Hyuga and bitter," Naruto says in an angry voice and I notice the disappointment in his eyes. I feel my eyes widen as I grow surprised that he could feel anger over this.

_Are you seriously getting upset over this?_ I write quickly and he looks away from me. I wait for his response.

"It's just…when people deny other's feelings their own private feelings without even thinking of the person it's unacceptable to me. You shouldn't deny something that you know nothing about. Are you inside his heart? Can you read his mind? No, so don't think that it's okay to deny someone's honest feelings about you. Don't dismiss something so important and beautiful," he tells me in a semi-angry tone. I gulp down my salvia. I look away from him and stare at the bright sky.

I get what he's trying to say but I can't bring myself to believe in Sasuke. I love Sasuke but the way he's treated me over the last few years has always had me wondering. If somewhere deep inside of him does he resent me or something. Does he hate me for something that I did to him? Because he has enjoyed the torment our classmates have put me through. Because I have to admit that if he actually loved me he wouldn't let me live through that.

I turn my head to stare at Naruto. Suddenly I have this need to tell him all this. To let him know, why I don't believe in Sasuke. Instead I keep quiet, like always. This is the one time I wish I could scream. To scream so loud it hurts my throat and leaves my lungs empty of air. Before I know it my vision becomes blurry. I stop walking and try to force myself to stop crying. Instead the tears come down faster. I bring my hands up to my eyes and wipe the tears away but more fall, I rub my eyes hard hoping to stop them but nothing comes of it. I've become a cry baby…this isn't me. I'm not supposed to feel anything or care about anything. I'm supposed to be indifferent to everything. But Naruto's words they hurt. They hurt me so much.

I know Sasuke doesn't love me. I know it yet Naruto got mad at me for writing my opinion. Naruto got mad at me…I gasp for air as I sob into my cupped hands.

"What's wrong?" I hear Naruto ask me, I shake my head. "Why are you crying?" he questions me terrified, he reaches out to touch my shoulder but I pull away from him.

I crash into someone and I take my hands off of my eyes to see Gaara there with Temari and Kankuro. All three look at Naruto and he ignores them and focuses on me. I turn around and give Naruto my back and grab onto Gaara's arm, he stares at me wondering what is going on.

"What did you do to the girl, new boy?" Kankuro angrily asks Naruto as he steps up to him.

"Nothing, we were just talking!" he says. I look at Gaara and he looks at me and without even trying to ask me anything he puts his arm around me and walks with me to school. We walk alone Kankuro and Temari staying behind and bothering Naruto with questions. Gaara doesn't say anything and the tears stop falling after a while in silence. Gaara doesn't look at me as he removes his arm.

"He most likely didn't know he was saying anything bad. I've watched him and could tell that he doesn't know how to talk to normal people. He doesn't realize when he's being an asshole. So don't take it seriously," he tells me as he walks away from me. I stand alone watching as Gaara leaves me. Gaara will always be a mystery to me.

"Yo," I hear Sasuke say to me as he sneaks up behind me. "What's all that commotion with Naruto and the siblings?" he questions me acting as if nothing is different. He hasn't even looked over at me. I write down on my notepad and I shove it in his face.

_I need to talk to you about everything._ He finally looks at me and notices my red eyes but chooses to ignore it.

"I don't want to talk to you," he says as he begins to walk away. I grab his shoulder and whirl him around by force and slap him on his left cheek. He looks down at me shocked and awe clouding his expression.

_You WILL listen to me_. I write angrily. I grab him by his sleeve and pull him along with me.


	12. Compassion

**Gah, I don't know what to do! This is the first time in a long time that I don't get one review for my story…I'm heartbroken…**

**But it's okay. I love this story too much to give up on it.**

**It's actually true what teachers say. Reading the story out loud helps you in catching mistakes. I've been doing that a lot recently and I catch almost everything! I'm quite proud!**

…**so yeah…**

**I thought this Spring Anime Season was going to suck but I have found many animes to watch I'm really happy! I love Tamako Market, it's so adorable! KyoAni is seriously the best animation studio! I NEED a Dera Mochimazzi plush! Especially when he gets really fat! Oh my globs I love him!**

**But yeah…**

**KUROKO NO BASUKE GETS A SECOND SEASON! I'M SO HAPPY! I GET TO SEE AOMINE ANIMATED AGAIN! YAY!**

**OH! I'm going to give you a sneak peek at the new story I'm writing at the end of this chapter!**

* * *

**I'm like really awkward at the moment…** here is the usual since I'm putting this on all of my stories so everyone can know:

Here is the link to a community I created on google+ ask to join if you would like! I have some chapters up for download {old stories only sorry} Just remove the brackets and put periods instead of dots:

[plus]dot[google]dotcom/u/0/communities/101982540686543034709?hl=en

Okay, what I have on my profile still stands. I'm not sure if I didn't express myself correctly or what but I'm going to state some things on here.

First, I'm going to leave fanfiction once I finish **ALL** my ongoing stories, for example this one and TWWL, I'll always find you, GINT, Do Over, and the special story I wrote for my friend!

Second, once I've completed all my stories I'll leave them up for a while then I will delete this account and the stories.

Third, I decided to post all my stories on my livejournal, my user name is: _**luvintulips**_, currently I have it friend locked, so if you want to read new stories of mine {they are not up now, I'm trying to focus on my current stories and revise my old stories} or if you want the newly revised chapters of JAT and JAB {with an alternate ending that I came up with before but never added it to the current story, but these aren't up either} request that I add you as my friend on livejournal by leaving me a comment. **I feel like I can control my stories better on there, also I ask you now, not to share the stories I post to livejournal to anyone. And if I do decide to email you the stories please do not distribute my stories without my consent because if you do share them without asking me then I'll just stop and not continue writing. Please respect my decisions.**

Fourth, I might also add my stories to my fanficiton tumblr, the link to it is on my profile so you could follow me or whatever you would like to keep up with me.

Fifth, I understand this is selfish and it seems vain to everyone for me to do this. But I just can't with this website anymore. It's not about reviews, at least not entirely about reviews, it's just I don't really know. So many of the people I love have left and it's sort of like…it's just not really fun…

Sixth, I will make all chapters downloadable, most likely with Word or any other sort of format; I know I could use google documents also.

Seven, is a jerk, so if you give me your email in order for me to email you the stories you need to write it out for example write your email like this: _iluvbubblegum_9 at gmail dot com_ . That's how you are supposed to write down your email if you want me to email you the stories, okay?

Eight, I' am eternally grateful to every single one of you who took the time to review or send me a PM. Some amazing friendships came out of those PM's and reviews. Every single person who takes the time to read my lame stories, I thank you and appreciate everything you have done for me. Thank you and seriously I love you! I continue to write these stories because of you, because I know that some of you are shy yet really like my stories. I'm sorry for doing this to you but I just really want you to know that you are amazing and wonderful!

Nine, this isn't over, not yet, I still have to finish all my stories. I really want to finish them soon, but I don't want to rush them. Just know that I will finish every single story on here and give you an ending, I won't give up. I'm sorry for being such a slowpoke, I'm sure if I had a laptop I wouldn't have these long periods of absence. I will finish my stories, I promise you!

* * *

**Chapter 12: Compassion**

It doesn't matter to me that we are skipping first period. I grab Sasuke by his wrist and force him into an empty classroom. I slam the door shut and let go of him as I walk to the front of the class and put my stuff on the desk and look back at him. He sits on top of a desk and looks away from me. I don't understand why I need to talk to him. I don't get _this_ need…

I grab a marker and begin to write on the white board.

_Why does Naruto think that you love me?_ I find myself asking him this first.

"I don't know," he answers. I cap the marker and face him. I wonder what type of expression I'm showing him because his eyes widen at my face. I feel this need to cry take over. I look into his eyes and mouth.

_I need you to pay attention to me, I need you to tell me the truth_, I mouth the words without any sound. _Please…_

"I do though," he says in an urgent manner. I want to shake my head but I stop myself. I give him my back and go to the white board.

_You don't. If you did you would've defend me from Sakura and Ino. You would've stopped them but you looked like you enjoyed them tormenting me. You took pleasure in seeing me weak like that. You can't say you love me after you made me suffer like that!_ I say what has been on my mind since I stopped talking. _If anything you hate me for something I can't remember… _

"I never hated you…I can't…you are Hinata: the girl who is _my_ friend. Even if you chose the _other side_ over me always. I still considered you the most important person in my world," he admits to me.

_Why did you let them bully me then? Why did I have to suffer like that when you could've easily defended me!_ I want to shout out.

"I wanted to see if you suffering would've brought out your voice!" he yells at me. My eyes grow huge at his outrage. "Don't you get it? I thought that if they pushed you hard enough then you could've spoken out! That you would've yelled at them! Cursed them! That I would've been able to hear you again! Every time I looked at Sakura treat you like shit a little part of me hoped that this was the day you would speak out. That you would finally tell off your tormenters but it seems he has a more powerful hold than I would've imagined."

I stand here unable to write anything. He looks at me I can see how haunted he really is.

"I never once took pleasure in your pain. I never wanted to prolong it but I still always had hope that one day you would finally say enough. That you would finally stand up. That you would finally give Sakura what she deserved. I stood there against everything hoping that you would finally push her away and tell her off. I wanted that to happen but it never did. I always had hope that today was the day…but after a while I gave up…I don't want to say that I've given up on hearing you again. But it seems like…it's been forever Hinata…why did you stop trying?" he questions me and sounds tired of everything. He looks so defeated so sad…I've never seen him like this…

_I made a promise I think…I promised him that I wouldn't talk ever again to protect him…_ for some reason I write. I hear movement at the back me and find Sasuke standing behind me he grabs me from my shoulders and roughly shakes me. The marker I was holding falls to the ground. The cap flies off and lands by the door. I look up to find his expression desperate. He looks like he finally found his treasure.

"Tell me his name Hinata! Say it!" he shouts at me and I look at him helplessly. I don't know his name. I don't know his face. Everything…all my memories are foggy and I can't make anything out. I push him away and bend down to pick up the marker.

_I don't remember it or him. Everything is too foggy to make anything out. Only his voice is…I can hear him…_I finally admit the truth.

I've been hearing his voice more and more. I hear him wake me from my sleep. I hear him tell me that I annoy him. That I should just sit still and shut my mouth. That I'm actually strong for being so young and a girl. That he's hopeful that I'll be good for something. His voice is what creates my nightmares. It's because of that voice I haven't been able to sleep at night. I've been reduced to sleeping during the day. And even then sometimes I still hear him.

That look of defeat overtakes his face once more. He looks so disappointed and distraught. I watch him amazed that he could feel these things. Sasuke is strong. He's been my strength for so long that to see him like this…it feels like I've…like I've taken any hope he had…

_If you were to tell me his name maybe I can remember something_…I try to help him regain what little hope he had. He looks at me and his expression changes. He's angry…

"Your dad…he took you to a psychologist when you first stopped talking," Sasuke begins. I don't remember this. "The psychologist said his name and you lost it. You couldn't handle hearing the name and he told us that if you hear it again then you just might lose it for good…" he admits to me something I have no recollection of.

_Lose what?_ I question him. I don't want to know. Not really…

"You'll lose your sanity. His name triggers something inside of you that makes you lose what little control you had," he tells me as he looks outside the windows.

_That's stupid. How could this man that I don't even remember affect me this much? How could he dictate my life how he pleases? It's pathetic and I don't believe it. Tell me what is he to me? Do you know him?_ I question him. He turns to look at the board and I watch him closely. He turns his face to the right.

"No, I have no idea who he is to you. I've never met him," he lies so easily. I grab the eraser and throw it at his head.

_I've known you long enough to figure out that you are lying to me! Why are you doing this?_ I hope he can tell that I'm angry.

"I have to protect Hinata. I have to make sure that nothing happens to you," he murmurs more to himself than to me.

I grab the marker angrily and begin to write_. How could you even believe that? How can you even stand in front of me acting as if you know nothing when the truth is that you know everything! That you know who is affecting me like this yet you chose to keep quiet! How can you be so cruel? How can you hate me so much? I want to know! I'm strong, much stronger than before and I deserve to know the name of the man that took my voice with him! I want to hear my voice. I want to talk Sasuke. I can't take this silence anymore! I just can't. I want to talk to him! I want to be able to have a normal conversation with him! I want to be able to speak and smile happily with him but you aren't letting me! You are holding me back. You are keeping me chained to you even though you have the keys in your pocket! Just help me Sasuke, help me by giving me his name!_ I plead with him. His face becomes blank as he looks at me.

"You love Naruto?" he questions me his voice is just above a whisper.

I suddenly realize what I wrote. I turn to look at Sasuke's empty eyes and it hits me. I do. It's stupid but I love Naruto.

He gets me, we've spent such little time together but I feel something so powerful for him? It's foreign…its strong and most of all its weird. It's not me. It's not who I' am.

"You love Naruto." He repeats this time it's a statement and not a question.

I'm unable to respond and he walks out on me. I stand here unsure what just happened. Is he angry? Is he hurt? Is he disappointed? I want to run after him but there is no use. There is no point in me chasing after him. I can't tell him anything. I'm just so useless…

* * *

As it turns out today is the day that Sakura returns and she zeroed in on Hinata as she comes out of an empty classroom. I walk quickly to her knowing what's about to occur.

"Did you think that it would be okay for you to act like the queen of this school you worm?" Sakura says. I step forward away from the large crowd that has gathered around them. It's like they have been waiting for this to happen after her long suspension.

"Leave her alone Sakura. I'm not going to let you bully her anymore," I look around me and direct my following words to the crowd. "Leave now you fucking rats. Leave this second or I start throwing punches!" I announce and right away they begin to disperse. No one says anything as they leave. I just hear a bunch of murmurs. I also don't fail to notice some people are just gathering further away.

"Oh, what are you her savior now, Naruto? You do understand what happens-" Sakura doesn't finish because Hinata throws her fist into her left cheek. Sakura wasn't expecting that and she falls to the ground. Hinata kicks her as she stays down then goes down on her and punches her arms and face. I pull her off of Sakura but Hinata gets out of my hold and goes down on Sakura again. I can feel as everyone watches Hinata speechless at her actions.

They've been so used to watching her take everything without doing anything in return. I'm amazed yet terrified at what she's become.

Shino runs up to us and helps me pull Hinata off of Sakura. I watch as Hinata breaths loudly and I notice the blood on her fists. Sakura cries on the ground covered in blood and bruises.

I must remember not to ever anger Hinata like that…

Her breathing becomes faster and I notice the tears in her eyes. Finally after so many years Hinata stood up for herself. She finally proved that she is strong enough to push someone down.

I for some reason feel really proud of her. Even if I got upset at her earlier for something really stupid which I had no right to get mad at. I can say that watching this Hinata gives me strength. She makes me believe that anything is possible. I really want to hug her…

"Take her to the nurses' office and I'll take Sakura," Shino directs me. Hinata gets out of my hold and walks away from me in long and angry steps. I stand here unsure if I should follow her or not. Before I think further about the consequences I chase after her retreating back.

"That was fucking awesome! You should've done that a long time ago!" I shout at her and punch her lightly on her shoulder. She turns her glare back at me and I gulp down my saliva. She is in no mood for praise. Without her having to say anything I realize that what she did right now is out of character for her. She doesn't want to hurt others. She doesn't want to bring them pain. Hinata is in pain because of what she did. She isn't proud of her moment. If anything she is disgusted with her actions and herself. I don't say anything further and I hide the fact that I'm terrified not of her but of these feelings I have for her.

I vowed to never fall in love. To never have a family because it's my punishment, it's my punishment to walk this planet alone. It's my vow to my father. I promised him that I would never be happy because I killed him. I killed the man who gave me life. So I have no right to fall in love.

I shouldn't fall in love with Hinata…

But it seems that I'm too late…

I already love her…

I love her so much that I'm willing to break my promise to the man I killed…

I'm willing to take her away from Sasuke and from Itachi who still holds her. I stand still as I watch this silent girl make her way on her own to the nurses office.

I love Hinata…I love her…

What does it really mean? What does it entail? What do I do?

She stops walking almost as if sensing my doubt and turns around to look at me. Her eyes haunt me so much. They show nothing on the surface but if you look deeply into them then you can see the person she is. The woman she is becoming. I swallow down my saliva wondering if it's normal to have a dry mouth. She is amazing…

She isn't for me though.

She should find someone who can make her happy because I can't. I can't do it. All I bring is death. I kill everyone I love…

"You know your eyes are kind of scary," she looks at me and I look down at the ground. "It's like they are full of life that…they aren't empty. They're scary because I feel that you can look into me like no one else does. It feels as if your eyes look into my soul," I look up and smile at her. "Like you know the real me, the one that I don't even know. Your eyes look into anyone's soul and that's why everyone is afraid of you…" I confess to her for some reason. She doesn't show any reaction to what I just said. I watch her as she looks down at the ground. I think she's embarrassed. She finally looks up at me and I notice a slight blush on her usually color less cheeks. She takes a step towards me and I take two. She takes another and I take one more until we are face to face just a few inches apart.

"I think I like you," I find myself admit to her eyes.

She doesn't say anything I just watch as a smile comes onto her mouth. Almost as if she is saying that she knows.

"How do you feel about me?" I question her in a whisper. A wider smile appears and she mouths the words.

_I can tolerate your presence_, she admits. I smile at her and almost as if we are both magnets we lean into one another unable to pull away and…

"What are you two doing?" Kurenai-sensei asks us as she leans into the right side of us. We jump apart and look surprised at sensei. "What happened?" she asks Hinata worried and forgetting all about the fact that we were about to kiss.

"She stood up for herself," I say not wanting to elaborate further. Kurenai-sensei looks at me almost as if she forgot I was there.

"I'll take her to Shizune you can go to class," she tells me putting her left arm around Hinata's shoulders and she guides her towards the infirmary. I stay still watching as Hinata leaves. She doesn't turn to look back at me and I'm grateful that she doesn't. If she did I would've pushed sensei out of the way to walk Hinata. I give them my back and walk in the opposite direction and make my way to class. I find Sasuke standing outside the classroom waiting for me. I stare at him and he glares at me.

"I lied, I do love her," he admits to me. I don't say anything and he doesn't continue. I look up at the sky.

"You are lying now. You don't love her, you love Hanabi," I tell him. He grabs me from my collar and raises his arm forming a fist and he's ready to punch me but he's not angry enough to actually hit me. "Hinata will never see you as anything more than a friend. She doesn't love you and never will," I admit and next thing I know I'm punched in the nose. I look at him. "If you would've treated her with respect and defended her once in a while she would have loved you. She would've never looked at me. It's your fault for not noticing her need for you. It's your fault for not helping her up," I continue to say. He ready's his fist to punch me again but Kakashi stops him.

"You don't know her! You weren't here to watch over her so you have no right to take her away from me!" he yells as Kakashi holds him back.

"I understand but it doesn't matter to her. What matters is that I'm here now and I don't plan to run away anymore. I'm going to stand next to her. I'm going to make sure she understands that I'm here for her, that I'll always be there when she needs me. I'm not leaving her anymore. I don't care if I go to hell for breaking my promise but I like her. I really do and I plan to fight for her. I want to walk next to her…" this is going to break our friendship. This is going to ruin what Sasuke and I had. It sucks but I still prefer to be with Hinata than to be his friend. He watches me and stops struggling in Kakashi's arms. Kakashi still holds him though he doesn't trust Sasuke.

"They never found his body. There's an implication that he's still alive. Are you prepared for what might come?" he asks me. He needs to hear what I have to say. He knows that what I say will decide whether he will come between us or if he will sit back and let us be together.

Sasuke was never able to answer this question. He was never able to stand up to Itachi that's why he never seriously tried to make Hinata fall in love with him. He forced himself to believe that he could never love her. He knew that he wouldn't be able to defend her if Itachi is in fact alive.

"If she wants to be with him then I won't force her to stay with me. But if there is even a little bit of hope that she will still love me than I'll stand with her. I _will_ stand against the Hyuga's and Uchiha's I don't care as long as Hinata wants me. That is all that matters, no one else," I admit to the boy who usually has all the answers. He watches me unsure of what to make out of it. He looks so confused at my answer. Almost as if he never thought of the possibility. I feel bad for him.

"I never had that determination with Hinata," Sasuke admits to me as Kakashi lets go of him. "I always saw her as his. I never could've imagined that Hinata…that she would've…" he looks at me with tears in his eyes. "I could've been with her. I could've known her better but I let him dictate my life like he's doing to her…" he tells me so stunned that he let her slip by. "She talked to me. Well not really but she moved her mouth like she was talking. You have no idea what that means. She's trying. She's trying to find her voice. It's all because of you," he gives me credit for something I had nothing to do with. "She's moving forward because she wants to be with you. She wants to be happy and she knows that she will if she's with you. Fight for her. She's worth it…" he tells me as he walks towards the boys bathroom.

"So you won't run away anymore?" Kakashi-sensei asks me. I stare at him and he looks at me. "Kushina contacted me. She wants to talk with you Naruto," he tells me and I look up towards the sky. If I want to stop running then I have to face her. But I don't want to. I don't want to see her not yet. Not when I'm finally happy… "I'll tell her you aren't ready yet. Here," he hands me a piece of paper and I see her number. "Call her when you feel you can." He tells me as he walks into the classroom. I look up at the sky. Sometimes I forget just how pretty the sky is.

* * *

I make my way to class and as I keep my head down I look up to find Naruto staring at the sky.

He's different from me. I keep looking down while he likes to look up at the vast sky. He's too bright for me. I'm grey yet he seems to be a vibrant orange…

Almost as if sensing me he looks over at me. A smile comes onto his mouth. I look away down at my hands. They have gauze to cover the cuts I have. Shizune told me that I should be suspended but Kurenai said that I shouldn't. They were arguing when I left. Sakura was crying on her bed the last time I saw her. I never meant to hurt her like that.

It's just that even if Sasuke believes that I can scream out at Sakura then maybe I would talk. But that isn't the case. I'm not going to stand up to her in that way. Instead I showed Sakura that the next time she tries anything I'll beat her again. I hated what I had to do.

I mean that was the first time I fought for real since the classes I was forced to take by my dad. I took some boxing classes along with other martial arts classes. I was always told by my teachers that I had a talent in the arts but I never wanted to do that. I never wanted to fight and beat people for a living so after I was kicked out of my house I stopped attending the classes. Most likely it was the best decision I made. I look up once more and find him watching me. He doesn't say anything because he doesn't know how to react towards me anymore. He's grown shy. I smile to myself and I walk towards the classroom door and he runs to it but before he can open it I hear Sasuke call out to me.

"What happened?" he asks as he walks towards me.

"She defended herself against Sakura," Naruto answers for me. I nod my agreement.

"Where is she now?" Sasuke asks growing worried. He used to be at the receiving end of my punches so he knows just how strong I' am.

"She's at the nurse's office, why?" Naruto questions him.

"I used to train with Hinata and she was brutal and a savage when she fought. She changed when she was in the ring or training mats. The beast took over right?" he questions me. I look to my left side towards the courtyard of the school. "Don't be embarrassed you dork."

"What? I never knew that," Naruto admits.

"I told you that I know Hinata the best," Sasuke says in a weird tone. Naruto doesn't say anything as he just watches him. "I have something I need to tell you…" he directs his words to me. "I don't love you. I've given up on being able to be with you. Also, I've been dating Hanabi for a while now," he confesses. I run to him and punch him in the stomach. "I haven't touched her or anything!" he yells before falling to his knees. I clench my fist tightly as I aim for his jaw but someone grabs my fist. I glare back to see Naruto lightly touch it.

"You'll hurt yourself," he tells me. "Wait until you're healed to kick his ass. You shouldn't further harm your fists for this piece of trash," Naruto really does understand me. I lower my arm and he doesn't let go. I watch him and he quickly drops my hand.

"So are you dating?" Sasuke questions me. I shake my red face as fast as I can. I can't see myself dating Naruto. "Well I guess that says it all. And here I was going to ask if you two wanted to have a double date with Hanabi and me." He runs away before I can hit him again. I breathe hard at his retreating back. Naruto watches me because I can feel his eyes on me. I don't meet them instead I watch the door close.

"Would it be okay if I go to your apartment at night to keep you company?" he asks me. I slowly turn my head to stare at him. I have no words to describe this feeling of happiness. Happiness alone isn't the best word. No, this goes beyond happiness…

He's going to help me fight off my demons. He's going to be there with me in order to stop them from appearing. He's just going to be there. I won't be alone any more…I could hug him but instead I nod my agreement. He grins at me and I find myself smiling at him. He opens the door for me and I walk into the classroom forgetting about our earlier argument.

What made him change his mind about telling me how he feels? Maybe tonight he'll fill me in on his change.

* * *

**So as promised here is a sneak peek at one of the two new stories I'm working on.**

**I don't know when I'll post them.**

**Most likely when I'm done with ff…I hope you like it. I should really research more…**

**Oh it took me an hour to find the notebook! I forgot where I left it then after I was reading my old stories I remembered and sure enough it was on top of my printer…I'm so lame.**

* * *

Working title: **"Crazy is just a saying not a way of living"**

Every family has secrets. Some hide them better than others. Some kids withstand the pressure that is put on them. While other's have a breaking point. At different times three suffered from their breaking point and at a young age were put away to keep their families safe from scandal. They were left alone. Parents denied their existence and acted as if they were never born. One family told anyone who would listen that their son was admitted to an exclusive boarding school in Kumogakure. Another family acted as if she was never born and denied knowing anything about her. While the last one lost his parents. Everyone has phases and these three have just begun their most difficult phase at the age of fourteen…

It's difficult to be perfect. I mean everything that I do is criticized. If one strand of hair is out of place then I get yelled at. I was used to it. I learned to withstand my parents need for my perfection. I did what I could to make them see me as the perfect son they desired. After Itachi ran away to join a rock band my parents focus zoomed in on me. I was happy for a while but then I started to feel the pressure of their love. I began to notice how I wasn't the same person as before. I was always told how to behave, who to speak to, who to befriend, suddenly I realized that I wasn't living my life. Instead I was living the life my parents wanted. I snapped…I don't have any recollection of what I did but as I lay still on the hard bed I hear some people talk amongst themselves.

"He just came in last night," I hear a girl say. "He was brought in by Sarutobi senior, he went himself to go pick this guy up. He must be some rich kid."

"Look who's talking," a boy murmurs.

"Naruto, how come you didn't tell me?" the same girl asks someone new. I open my eyes and find a guy sitting on the edge of my bed. His hair looks like a pineapple and he watches me closely. The girl is wearing long shorts, a shirt that's off her shoulders and isn't wearing any shoes. Her dark blue hair is long and it has strands of bright pink color. The hair is really long and messy. It covers her eyes. I look at the other boy in the bed across the room. He sits there as he stares out of the window.

"Sasuke," I don't even see his mouth move.

"He's made progress a year ago he wouldn't speak now he at least speaks one word at a time," the girl says as she pushes her bangs back. I catch a glimpse of lavender before it becomes enveloped in dark blue and pink. "I'm Hinata, I tried to commit suicide," she shows me the scars on her wrists. "I should've tried to cut my throat but no I had to go the classic route." She sighs. "So what do you have?"

"He must be a schizo, I'm Shikamaru," the guy on my bed says lazily.

"Oh I see it. You shouldn't hear voices because you already swallowed the pills right?" she looks over at the blond boy. He nods without looking. "Aren't you going to ask where you're at?"

"I'm in a rehab aren't I?" I finally speak.

"So normal!" she shouts. "The drugs are working. It's an insane asylum," she announces with a grin.

"We are a rehabilitation center not an asylum," someone new in a white lab coat enters the room. I watch the girl stiffen and give her back to the doctor. "How much longer are you going to keep giving me this silent treatment?" he sighs as she continues to act as if he isn't there. "I'm Kakashi Hatake, Dr. Sarutobi asked me to show you around. Shikamaru your roommate Gaara is asking for you."

"He's going to accuse me of stealing his teddy bear," he announces as he slowly stands.

"Don't worry he'll find it," Hinata says manically.

"Hinata, what have I told you about taking other's things?" Kakashi asks.

"He tried to set my hair on fire!" she screams. "Gaara knows that if my hair leaves the voices come back! He knows but he still tried to kill me!"

"Didn't you try to kill yourself?" I ask. I suddenly realize that was the wrong thing to say. She whirls around so quickly that I scarcely noticed.

"How dare you mention death so casually?" she screams. "Don't you understand the pain? I only did it because the voices told me to! Not because I wanted to! The voices! The voices! They did it, it was them!" she shouts stomping her feet.

"Brush," Naruto says. Suddenly Hinata stops and runs to Naruto. She sits on the floor while he takes out a hair brush and begins to brush her hair. I hear as she softly sings a song that seems familiar.

"Leave while you have the chance," Shikamaru whispers as he slips out the door. The two of us do the same. "See you around," he leaves.

* * *

**Pretty short preview right?**

**What?! I'm so not making you join lj or my google community so that you can join me and get this story! I would never!**

**I'm excited for it!**

**Oh, my other story has Naruto and Sasuke as butlers! And lame mysteries! I really need to read mystery novels for that story…so that I can get an idea on how to go about it…**


End file.
